Rating: PG
Pairing: Sarah/Harry
Beta: hhertzof
Summary: An AU of Doctor Who: The Soap Opera, but in this case, Sarah keeps the baby and marries Harry. The question is, was she right to do it?

Sarah can't remember the last time she felt like this. Admittedly she's been drinking, but Walt says all the right things to flatter her. Although she's sure he doesn't mean half of them and he's probably just saying them to get her into bed, she doesn't care. She's forgotten what it's like to flirt or to kiss someone without it being a duty.

Her anticipated evening of fun ends abruptly on the bed in her hotel room as Walt roughly unbuttons her blouse and it's guilt she feels, not lust.

"I'm sorry," she says to Walt, who berates her for leading him on before he leaves.

Whenever she goes away for a story she takes her wedding ring off and it lives in her purse, hidden among the coins, until she's near home. She likes to feel single again, but tonight has reminded her that her married status is something she can't forget.

Harry's a good man, but she doesn't love him and she never will. He would never cheat on her, but that's no longer enough; she needs something more in her life. Tomorrow she has to go home and tell him. And she doesn't know if she'll be able to face him at all.

~*~*~

The overnight flight means it's still early when she lands, although she has to fight the rush hour traffic on her way out of the airport. She nearly turns away, but she's expected and Elizabeth, at least, will be upset if she's not back.

Harry is behind the door as she opens it; he's on his way out. Sarah returns her daughter's enthusiastic greeting, but when her husband moves to kiss her, she turns her head away. He frowns but says nothing. She anticipates his return home with growing unease.

Although she's tired she does the washing and cleans the house like a good wife ought to. That way it won't matter if Harry doesn't get to it for a while. Then she packs and leaves her suitcase in the bedroom.

After picking her daughter up from nursery, she watches as Elizabeth tries out the new crayons Sarah's brought her back from America. Sarah makes all the right noises over the drawings and later, when no one's looking, she slips them into her suitcase.

Harry's home in time to put Elizabeth to bed, as he always is. He ignores his wife in favour of his tired daughter and Sarah is guiltily glad as she cooks. Harry spends longer on Elizabeth's bedtime story than usual and dinner is ready when he comes back downstairs.

They don't speak until after they've eaten.

"You're leaving me," he says, watching her wash a saucepan.

She doesn't know how he knows, she's just relieved she doesn't have to break it to him, and glad she has her back to him, so she can't see the expression on his face. By the time she says, "Yes," and turns around he's not quite looking at her.

"Why now?" he asks, head ducked. "What's different about today?"

The sponge she still holds drips soapy water on the floor, but neither of them notice. "I nearly had an affair." She didn't, but she could have.

His gaze flicks up to where her left hand rests on the counter. Belatedly she realises she has forgotten to put her wedding ring back on.

He sighs. "Where will you go?"

"Aunt Lavinia's." She doesn't have anyone else to go to. She doesn't want to have to admit to Lavinia that she had been wrong, that she'd made mistakes, but at least her house is big enough for Sarah to hide herself away in.

Although the topic is different, their conversation is the same as every other they've had recently. When they first married they argued constantly, although quietly so Elizabeth didn't hear. Later, it was easier to assume tacit agreement even when there was none, and silence was more common. Now Sarah suspects it was because they had nothing to say to each other.

When Harry says, "I'll get your suitcase," he doesn't wait for an argument and she doesn't offer one. They don't even say goodbye - he just puts her case in the boot of her car before going back inside the house and shutting the door.

Sarah gets in her car and wonders why, when she'd finally made the right decision, that she is crying over it.

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Fandom: Doctor Who | Type: AU, Character: Harry Sullivan, Character: Sarah Jane Smith, Length: Vignette, Pairing: Sarah/Harry, Series: Soap Opera, Type: Het | Link

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