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	<title>Angelic Paranoia - Fan Fiction &#187; Stargate Atlantis</title>
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	<description>Paranoidangel's Fan Fiction</description>
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		<title>[Stargate Atlantis] Just a Game</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/11/29/stargate-atlantis-just-a-game/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/11/29/stargate-atlantis-just-a-game/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 29 Nov 2011 19:58:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[AU]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Daniel Jackson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Elizabeth Weir]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Jack O'Neill]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Janet Fraiser]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: John Sheppard]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Jonas Quinn]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Sam Carter]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Teal'c]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Short story]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pairing: John/Elizabeth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Het]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Written for: Langford University AU]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/?p=587</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: PG Pairing: Sheppard/Weir, hints of Janet/Daniel American picker: hhertzof Spoilers: None Summary: Elizabeth goes to a football game. Notes: Part 1 is set before Dot Com, part 2 is after. Part 1 Elizabeth couldn't help but smile when she spotted John leaning against his car, waiting for her. After he'd spent days pestering her, [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: PG<br />
Pairing: Sheppard/Weir, hints of Janet/Daniel<br />
American picker: hhertzof<br />
Spoilers: None<br />
Summary: Elizabeth goes to a football game.<br />
Notes: Part 1 is set before Dot Com, part 2 is after.<br />
<span id="more-587"></span><br />
Part 1</p>
<p>Elizabeth couldn't help but smile when she spotted John leaning against his car, waiting for her. After he'd spent days pestering her, she had eventually given in and agreed to go to one of Langford's football games with him. It wasn't that she didn't support the team, she just wasn't particularly keen on football and was happy to just read the results in the school paper. John, of course, was an ardent fan. When she had asked him if this weekend's game was important he had told her in a slightly shocked tone, that they were <i>all</i> important.</p>
<p>So, in retrospect, it should not have come as a big surprise to see him dressed nearly entirely in burgundy and gold, including a Langford sweatshirt and Langford scarf. She was tempted to find out what color his socks were or ask him if he had the Langford boxers on.</p>
<p>Elizabeth, by contrast, had just dug out her Langford t-shirt from the back of her closet. She'd bought it on a whim one day, not long after she started working there, and never really had occasion to wear it since. However, it wasn't warm enough to wear on its own, so the effect was somewhat lost when she put a jacket over it.</p>
<p>"Hey," he greeted her, standing up as she approached. "Don't you at least have something in school colors?"</p>
<p>She sighed. "Just this t-shirt." Since she hadn't yet zipped her jacket up, she opened it to show him.</p>
<p>There was an expression on his face for a minute that she couldn't quite decipher, but then he pulled off his scarf and wrapped it around her. She shivered when his cold hands brushed her neck. He stepped back and smiled at the effect. "That's better. And it will keep you warm too."</p>
<p>"Thank you," she said, resisting the temptation to ask John what laundry detergent he used, because his scarf smelled wonderful.</p>
<p>"Come on." He turned in the direction of the football field. "I'll buy you a hot chocolate."</p>
<p>She followed him. "You're just trying to get me to take my coat off, aren't you?"</p>
<p>He turned to smirk at her. "It's not as if you're not wearing anything under it."</p>
<p>"Why do all men have one-track minds?" She asked rhetorically, but smiled back anyway.</p>
<p>"Two," he said, calling out to her as she trailed behind him, "don't forget football!"</p>
<p>She rolled her eyes. He was saved from her reply, though, because he was busy buying them a hot chocolate each and stopping to have a conversation about the game with the guy selling it. Elizabeth stood off to one side, cradling her hot chocolate and looked around. There weren't that many people about and none of them wanted hot drinks yet. When John had told her what time to meet him she thought it was early, but given that he knew more about the subject than she did, she assumed she'd got the kick-off time wrong. But perhaps not.</p>
<p>"Why are we so early?" she asked him, when other people came looking for drinks and he was forced to tear himself away.</p>
<p>"So we can get the best seats." His tone of voice suggested this was obvious.</p>
<p>She couldn't complain about that because she'd done the same thing herself in the past, just not for football. As she sipped her drink, she let him lead them up into the stands to where he assured her was the best place to sit, although she couldn't tell why it was an improvement over most of the other seats. Once there they found Jack and Teal'c had beat them to it. They were both in Langford colors, although Jack's consisted of the baseball team's cap and jersey, which Elizabeth had to stifle a laugh at.</p>
<p>They exchanged greetings and Elizabeth slid in next to Jack, with John on the other side of her.</p>
<p>"I didn't think you were that keen on football," she said to Jack.</p>
<p>"Hockey is better," he confirmed, "but Teal'c's a fan and I support the team."</p>
<p>"I hear the new quarterback is worth watching," Teal'c put in and before she knew it he and John had launched into a discussion over her and Jack about the merits of the members of the team.</p>
<p>"I didn't know you liked football," Jack said to her, also tuning out the other's football conversation.</p>
<p>"I don't. But I was persuaded to come. And I support the team too," she added.</p>
<p>Jack raised an eyebrow. "So the rumors are true."</p>
<p>She sighed. "Not you, too."</p>
<p>Jack just grinned at her and Elizabeth shook her head, refusing to answer.</p>
<p>Luckily for her, the smell of hot dogs intruded and she started to feel hungry, even though she had eaten before she left the house. The owner of the hot dog was a good few paces behind the scent and revealed himself to be Jonas, with Daniel in tow.</p>
<p>"Hey, guys," Daniel said, and another round of greetings were exchanged, except for Jonas who had his mouth full. His food disappeared quickly enough, though, and he sat down next to John, who had moved on to debate the merits of the opposing team. Today they were up against the Wraith. Daniel sat behind Jack, and he and Elizabeth turned round to talk to him.</p>
<p>Not that they had a chance to say much before Sam and Janet arrived. If Elizabeth didn't have a good sense of self-preservation she might have accused Janet of stalking Daniel - Elizabeth was sure her appearance so soon after Daniel's arrival was unlikely to be a coincidence. So she was unsurprised to watch Janet make a beeline for Daniel and sit next to him, although Sam was happy enough to join in the football talk. Despite being at the other end of the group, Teal'c had no problem making himself heard.</p>
<p>Out of the corner of her eye she saw Jonas's pants leg had moved up and exposed a strip of what looked suspiciously like a dark yellow sock. Not quite able to believe what she was seeing, and the possibility of what she was not, despite what she had thought about John's clothes earlier, she interrupted their conversation. "Jonas, please tell me your other sock isn't dark red."</p>
<p>Jonas flashed her a grin and a leg, and revealed that it was exactly as bad as she suspected.</p>
<p>Elizabeth groaned.</p>
<p>John leaned over to whisper in her ear, "I've got the school boxer shorts on."</p>
<p>She ignored the way his breath tickled her skin. "Why does that not surprise me?" she said in a low voice. "But how can they show how big a fan you are if no one can see them?"</p>
<p>"All you had to do was ask." He caught hold of the waistband of his pants on the side nearest to her.</p>
<p>"John!" she said, shocked, and grabbed his hand before he could do anything, not quite believing that he was willing to reveal his underwear in the football stadium.</p>
<p>There was the sound of giggling behind them, which stopped immediately when Elizabeth turned round. "I know exactly why you're here, Janet Fraiser," she said, to divert Janet's suspicions about what she thought she'd seen.</p>
<p>"And why would that be?" Janet asked, in an innocent tone.</p>
<p>Elizabeth noticed that not only were Sam and Janet staring at her - Sam looking interested, Janet her usual combination of innocent and murderous - but Daniel had also stopped his conversation with Jack to hear her answer. Despite her law background she found herself unable to mount her own defense and had to settle for, "You know."</p>
<p>Janet merely grinned and Elizabeth decided to turn her attention to the field, where the cheerleaders were gathering as the bleachers filled up. A shouting war was just starting up between the two teams' fans, led by the cheerleaders, and Elizabeth winced as John joined in. Oblivious to her discomfort he picked up one end of his scarf - that she was wearing - and waved it a bit.</p>
<p>"Would you like your scarf back?" she asked him.</p>
<p>"Huh?" he replied, before he focused on her and dropped the scarf in response. "Are you warm yet?"</p>
<p>"No." Although it had become something of a matter of pride that she was not going to take her jacket off regardless.</p>
<p>He grinned as he slid closer to her so they were almost touching at the leg and shoulder. She didn't move away. "When you are, let me know."</p>
<p>Fortunately for them both, the players started making their way onto the field and Elizabeth's ears were assaulted once more. It didn't stop once they started playing either, for John was quick to shout encouragement at the players and jeer at the opposition. Every time the Explorers scored he jumped up and Elizabeth thought she might as well have been invisible. Everyone else around them was getting into the spirit too.</p>
<p>Elizabeth couldn't help but be caught up in the excitement, but it might have been easier if she knew what was going on. It was difficult to concentrate on the game when people stood up in front of her every five minutes and all that told her was that she should have been watching beforehand, not trying to work out what she had just missed.</p>
<p>"Did you see that?" John asked, excitement in his eyes as he sat back down and noticed she was watching him.</p>
<p>"No, what just happened?"</p>
<p>"The Wraith fumbled and we scored from <i>nowhere</i>."</p>
<p>She nodded. "Okay."</p>
<p>"Never mind," he sighed. "It's half-time anyway."</p>
<p>He was right, she discovered, and she turned back to the field to watching the cheerleaders perform. She was sure she had seen at least one of them outside John's office door, which didn't surprise her. However, cheerleading routines were better appreciated by young men and Elizabeth looked for someone to to converse with. Preferably about a topic that wasn't football. But Janet and Daniel were having an earnest discussion about something Elizabeth couldn't quite hear and she didn't want to intrude. Everyone was talking about  the Explorers' amazing playing in the first half of the game.</p>
<p>Fortunately Jack leaned over and asked, "Help me with this crossword?"</p>
<p>Elizabeth looked over to see he had a folded up newspaper in his lap, containing a half-completed crossword. It said something about her concentration on the game that she hadn't even noticed Jack wasn't paying attention. Or perhaps it was just that he wasn't paying attention to the cheerleaders. "Don't you have a bet with Sam about that?"</p>
<p>He shrugged. "She's not listening."</p>
<p>Elizabeth looked over and saw that he was right, so she took pity on him. "All right, what are you stuck on?"</p>
<p>"Up, down, charmed, something."</p>
<p>It wasn't her field of expertise but she had heard of that sequence. "Strange."</p>
<p>"Hmm, yes, it is." Jack's tone suggested that he hadn't understood the answer. "Never mind."</p>
<p>She didn't get a chance to explain it to him before the second half began and everyone turned their attention back to the game.</p>
<p>They weren't far into the second half when it became clear, even to Elizabeth, that both teams were playing completely differently than their earlier performances. The Explorers had been scoring, although not often, but when they had it had been spectacular, and the Wraith had consistently missed easy shots. Now, however, the Wraith seemed to have woken up and the Explorers were struggling to catch up. The Wraith beat their impressive score during the third quarter.</p>
<p>After berating the Explorers for a while, John had lapsed into silence along with most of the rest of the crowd. Elizabeth stifled a yawn and pretended not to notice John's fingers playing with his scarf.</p>
<p>The next thing she knew she was comfortably warm, even if her pillow was a little hard. The background noise of the football game grew and she pushed herself up from her position on John's shoulder.</p>
<p>"Hello, Sleeping Beauty," he said, smiling at her, but not moving his arm from around her waist.</p>
<p>"I'm not," she replied, rubbing her eyes. She had been comfortable, even though she was sitting on a hard seat with John's shoulder for a pillow.</p>
<p>His smile turned to a grin. "What, not sleeping or not beautiful?"</p>
<p>Elizabeth opened her mouth but couldn't find a good way to answer that without incriminating herself.</p>
<p>"If you were trying to stop any rumors," Janet said, leaning down to mutter in her ear, with a grin Elizabeth didn't like the look of, "falling asleep on his shoulder wasn't the way to do it."</p>
<p>"It was only because he was sitting next to me," she said, turning round to face Janet. "It could just as easily have been Jack."</p>
<p>"Except you're sitting a lot closer to John."</p>
<p>Elizabeth glared at her even though she and John had been shoulder to shoulder the whole time - or at least whenever John was sitting down. When she turned back round to face the field John removed his arm and she could see that the game was over. The score up on the board explained why the Explorers cheerleaders were leaning despondently against each other. The crowd and the cheerleaders on the opposite side of the field were much more animated.</p>
<p>"I guess we lost," she said.</p>
<p>"Yeah," John answered, without enthusiasm.</p>
<p>"I need a drink," Jack said, with feeling.</p>
<p>"Good idea," she heard from Daniel, behind her, followed by, "I concur," from Teal'c. Jonas was the only one who didn't appear to be affected by the result, but that was just because he was more excitable to begin with and sometimes it was hard to tell the difference.</p>
<p>The walk to Maybourne's bar was not a long one. They were soon seated around a table with drinks and still no one spoke.</p>
<p>"That was..." John trailed off, obviously unable to find a good word to describe the game.</p>
<p>"Pathetic," Sam finished.</p>
<p>"Yeah, pathetic, that's it," John agreed, and heaved a big sigh.</p>
<p>Elizabeth smiled. He was actually quite sweet like this - like he needed a hug to make it all better. Not that she was about to offer, and certainly not in front of other people, even if they were their friends. Especially if they were their friends.</p>
<p>The atmosphere was quickly dispelling the comfortable warmth she had felt upon waking. She also couldn't stop thinking of all the work she needed to get done. Normally she would have tried to get through it all during the week but John was a disruptive influence. Which, admittedly, was not always a bad thing, but she did get far less work done now she had him to interrupt her every day. And yet she rarely threw him out of her office.</p>
<p>"I have to go," she said, breaking the morose silence and finishing her drink as she stood. "I have work to do," she added, smiling at John who looked puzzled at her wanting to leave.</p>
<p>There was a chorus of farewells and promises from her to Sam and Janet to meet for lunch next week. Outside, the air felt refreshing after the atmosphere in the bar, but she had no time to enjoy it because John had followed her out and cornered her outside the bar.</p>
<p>"I'm sorry." He stuck his hands in his pants pockets and looked contrite.</p>
<p>"What for?"</p>
<p>"I should have listened when you said you didn't like football. I thought once you gave it a chance--"</p>
<p>"Don't worry about it, John. I enjoyed myself." She wasn't going to think about how much of that was due to his presence. Or his shoulder.</p>
<p>He frowned. "Really? But we lost and you fell asleep."</p>
<p>She smiled. John was so focused on the game and the outcome that he failed to see what she had: she'd spent an enjoyable morning with her friends. That they lost was probably the only reason it hadn't turned into a whole day - although given the work she needed to get through before Monday morning, that was probably just as well. "See you Monday," she said, not feeling the need to explain it to him. Not least because he might then ask her to future games and she suspected the novelty would soon wear off.</p>
<p>"Wait!" he called, jogging the few steps to catch her up. She turned round to find him standing very close behind her. She resisted the immediate impulse to step backwards.</p>
<p>He put out one hand to finger her scarf. She ignored the way her heart beat faster as the back of his hand brushed her shoulder. "Can I have my scarf back?"</p>
<p>Elizabeth bit her lip to keep from smiling and shook her head. "I'm warm now," she said. "I think I'll keep it."</p>
<p>She stepped backwards, out of his reach and headed towards her car, leaving him too stunned to do anything about it.</p>
<p>~*~*~*~*~*~*~</p>
<p>Part 2</p>
<p>"It's just a football game, how long can it take to get ready?" John called up to Elizabeth.</p>
<p>She didn't bother answering, just carried on going through her wardrobe. "Aha," she said, finding what she had been looking for hidden away at the back behind some uncomfortable shoes. Watching the Langford Explorers pick their new team was not her ideal way of spending Saturday morning, but John went religiously every year and now that they were living together she was trying to take more of an interest in his interests. Even if that included football. For one reason or another they hadn't seen each other much this week, so they would at least get to spend some time together, which was how Elizabeth had rationalized it when John asked her to go with him.</p>
<p>By the time she made it to the bottom of the stairs, John was already out of the door and on the way to the car. Elizabeth rolled her eyes. Any other time she had trouble getting him out of the door late, never mind on time. And even though she had held them up, they would still be early.</p>
<p>He was so focused on getting there in time that he had driven to Langford, parked the car and bought her a coffee (so she wouldn't fall asleep this time, he told her) and handed it to her before he noticed what she was wearing. Elizabeth had never gotten around to building up the selection of Langford clothing that others had. She'd had a t-shirt once but that had long since been turned into a rag. What she did have now was a scarf, even if she hadn't worn it since the last football game she'd been to.</p>
<p>"That's my scarf," John pointed out.</p>
<p>"Good eyes." Elizabeth sipped her coffee to remind him she was holding it, therefore would be a bad idea for him to tackle her to get his scarf back. Not that it was his scarf any more. He had given it to her to keep her warm the last time he had dragged her to the football field. Refusing to give it back when he asked had started off as a game but ended up as a point of principle. Elizabeth wasn't sure why she was doing it, but she was certainly not going to stop and let him win.</p>
<p>John settled for glaring at her but Elizabeth knew he was plotting for later. It didn't matter, she would be ready.</p>
<p>Neither of them said anything as they made their way to the front row of the bleachers. Various students were already warming up and Elizabeth was unsurprised that several of them waved at John, or greeted him with a "Hey, Shep". John returned all of their greetings and asked a few of them for the names of the new players - presumably these were freshmen or older students only just trying out this year.</p>
<p>Elizabeth was seriously wondering if she should just give up now and lie down for a nap until it was all over when she was rescued by the surprise appearance of Sam Carter.</p>
<p>"Sam!" Elizabeth greeted her friend. "I didn't think anyone else would be crazy enough to be here."</p>
<p>As the potential players lined up there were a few cheers from the stand nearby, filled with students both male and female.</p>
<p>"Except for the players' fans, of course," she added.</p>
<p>"I could say the same for you," Sam replied. "Especially given what happened at the last game you went to."</p>
<p>Elizabeth rolled her eyes. Was anyone ever going to let her forget that? She kept the subject on Sam's reasons for being here and not the last game when she'd fallen asleep on John's shoulder. "John might occasionally get accused of cradle-snatching with his groupies--"</p>
<p>"Hey!" he said, without taking his eyes off the field.</p>
<p>Elizabeth ignored him. "--but I didn't think you were into the same thing."</p>
<p>"Well, in a choice between one of these guys and Rodney McKay..."</p>
<p>"I see your point." Elizabeth couldn't imagine anyone willingly dating Rodney.</p>
<p>"No, you're right. I'm trying to get more students interested in physics and I thought a course on the physics of football might help."</p>
<p>Elizabeth nodded, acknowledging the brilliance of the idea. "Sounds good."</p>
<p>"Yeah. You can imagine what McKay thought of it, though."</p>
<p>Elizabeth grinned; she could. "So what is he offering in competition?"</p>
<p>"I don't know yet. Either he's keeping it very secret, even from Radek, or he hasn't thought of anything better yet. I'm hoping for the second, although I don't think for one minute I'm going to lose this one." She sounded fierce about it.</p>
<p>"Ouch," John interrupted from beside them.</p>
<p>Elizabeth turned to the field, intending to ask what happened, but since she could see two of the players lying on the floor, she could guess, even with her meager knowledge of football.</p>
<p>"So, how's it going?" she asked him instead. Out the corner of her eye she saw Sam pull out a notebook and pen and start taking notes.</p>
<p>"I don't know why some of them are here at all," he gestured at the field, at a guy who'd just let the ball slip through his fingers. "They obviously don't know how to play."</p>
<p>"Perhaps they're hoping everyone else is going to be worse than them and they're going to get all the girls attention simply by being on the squad," she said, genuinely trying to take an interest this time.</p>
<p>"Probably. Although I think some of them do it for a dare."</p>
<p>Elizabeth rolled her eyes.</p>
<p>"There's a bunch of freshmen who look really good, but some of the old players are going to be hard to replace."</p>
<p>Throughout the training session John continued to point out those players he thought were good and would make the squad for sure, and those he thought were useless and had no chance. Elizabeth was surprised that she found his commentary interesting. But it was probably because he didn't just tell her the names of the players, he also talked about the backgrounds of the ones he knew, so she felt as if she knew them too, and was routing for them just as much as John was.</p>
<p>By the time they'd finished Elizabeth could see Sam had taken plenty of notes. Elizabeth wished her luck with the course as they departed, but Sam was already deep in thought.</p>
<p>"I think they picked the right players in the end," John said, as they made their way home.</p>
<p>"Hmm," Elizabeth said, non-committally.</p>
<p>"So, did you enjoy yourself?"</p>
<p>She could tell that was a leading question from the smile on his face. "The company was all right, I guess." She was certainly not going to give himself the satisfaction of saying yes.</p>
<p>"Only all right? And you didn't answer my question."</p>
<p>"I didn't?" She grinned. "I think I need a nap after that early morning."</p>
<p>John's smile only grew as she evaded his questions and tried to think of reasons not to go to any more games, let alone practice sessions, which he would certainly drag her along to if he could.</p>
<p>In the end, she let him have this victory. "I had a not entirely pleasant morning spent with my boyfriend and my friend."</p>
<p>"So," John began, "the next game is--"</p>
<p>"Oh, no, you don't," she cut in, pointing a finger at him. "That was my one game for the year. You can get up early if you like, but my weekends are sacred and I intend to spend them sleeping."</p>
<p>He shrugged. "It was worth a try."</p>
<p>And not just one either. John would be sure to leave it a while until she thought he had forgotten, then spring it on her when she least expected it. Probably at such a time when she was powerless to say no. There was definitely some tactical thinking she needed to employ on this problem.</p>
<p>John never quite stopped grinning all the way home and Elizabeth could tell he was making plans already. It would be annoying if she didn't find it so cute. She was almost relieved when they arrived home and could turn their attention to different topics. John certainly had another one in mind because they were barely inside the door when all of a sudden Elizabeth found herself against the wall being thoroughly kissed. Not that she was going to complain, it was just a little unexpected.</p>
<p>It was only when she realized his hands had made their way to her neck while he distracted her with his mouth that she worked out what he was doing.</p>
<p>"Oh no you don't," she said, managing to pull away and extricate her scarf from his grip.</p>
<p>"You can't say you weren't enjoying it." He pouted a little, but didn't look surprised that she'd rumbled him.</p>
<p>"Let me just hide <i>my</i> scarf and I'll be happy to pick up where we left off." She took a step towards the stairs, but he grabbed her arm.</p>
<p>"Forget about the scarf and we can get on with this sooner."</p>
<p>She raised her eyebrows. "So, you'd quite like to do this with the scarf on?"</p>
<p>John opened his mouth to retort but closed it again as he looked her up and down with a lascivious look on his face. Elizabeth couldn't help but blush under his gaze. "Kinky," he said.</p>
<p>Elizabeth laughed, although not for long because she soon found herself back against the wall, but this time John's hands were trying to remove other pieces of her clothing. Elizabeth suspected she might have won the scarf argument for good.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>[Stargate Atlantis] Just Chess</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/11/15/stargate-atlantis-just-chess/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/11/15/stargate-atlantis-just-chess/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 15 Nov 2011 21:04:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Elizabeth Weir]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Steven Caldwell]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Double drabble]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pairing: Weir/Caldwell]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Het]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/?p=585</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: PG Pairing: Weir/Caldwell Summary: They play chess. It was just chess. The first time they played, John's team were late. Elizabeth was pacing her office when Steven saw the board and challenged her to a game. It took her mind off the wait and the good news came just after he checkmated her. Smiling, [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: PG<br />
Pairing: Weir/Caldwell<br />
Summary: They play chess.<br />
<span id="more-585"></span><br />
It was just chess.</p>
<p>The first time they played, John's team were late. Elizabeth was pacing her office when Steven saw the board and challenged her to a game. It took her mind off the wait and the good news came just after he checkmated her. Smiling, she asked for a rematch.</p>
<p>It became a ritual. Whenever he was in Atlantis she challenged him for a game. Sometimes she won; often he did. The games helped him forget his bitterness at not being able to stay in Atlantis; it helped her forget the Earth she still missed.</p>
<p>Despite the time they spent together, they only ever spoke of work, but that wasn't always a safe topic as they vied for power. They couldn't even agree on how to handle the Wraith. Most games were played in silence and chess became their conversation.</p>
<p>He gambled with pawns, she tempted him with her queen. She backed him into a corner, he found a way out. They knew each other's moves; they learned new ones to surprise each other. When she kissed him neither of them said anything. When he was next on Atlantis, he kissed her.</p>
<p>It wasn't just chess any more.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>[Stargate/Atlantis] The Atlantis Sacrifice part 4</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/08/07/stargateatlantis-the-atlantis-sacrifice-part-4/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/08/07/stargateatlantis-the-atlantis-sacrifice-part-4/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 07 Aug 2011 14:59:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Daniel Jackson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Elizabeth Weir]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: General Landry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Jack O'Neill]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: John Sheppard]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Richard Woolsey]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Rodney McKay]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Ronon Dex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Teyla Emmagen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Long story]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pairing: Jack/Elizabeth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Series: The Atlantis Sacrifice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Het]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Written for: Sci-Fi Big Bang]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/?p=547</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: PG Beta: Tanaqui American-picker: hhertzof Pairing: Jack/Elizabeth Spoilers: Atlantis season 5. Summary: After recent events Jack and Elizabeth are both keen to resolve Atlantis's fate. Jack thinks Elizabeth's ascension should make that an easy task. Not only is he wrong, but they still have to deal with the IOA as well. Notes: The art [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: PG<br />
Beta: Tanaqui<br />
American-picker: hhertzof<br />
Pairing: Jack/Elizabeth<br />
Spoilers: Atlantis season 5.<br />
Summary: After recent events Jack and Elizabeth are both keen to resolve Atlantis's fate. Jack thinks Elizabeth's ascension should make that an easy task. Not only is he wrong, but they still have to deal with the IOA as well.<br />
Notes: The art for this was created by sexycazzy and can be found <a href="http://scifibigbang.livejournal.com/59425.html">here</a>.<br />
<span id="more-547"></span><br />
A week on Earth and the longer Elizabeth stayed there, the less it felt like home. The air smelled wrong, the birds didn't sound right and the noise of cars going by in the distance kept her awake. She was tired and didn't have the energy to do anything. By the time her mother brought her a coffee she'd read the same paragraph in her book three times.</p>
<p>Elizabeth smiled in thanks as she accepted the mug. Her mother hesitated, and then sat beside her on the couch.</p>
<p>"You can't just sit around all day, sweetheart." She sounded worried.</p>
<p>"I don't know what to do." Elizabeth rested her head on her mother's shoulder, wishing she was a child again and her mother could make everything better. "I can't do the only thing I want to do."</p>
<p>"You'll find something else." Her mother sounded so sure, but Elizabeth knew she was only saying that to cheer her up, so she didn't reply. "You won't get anywhere moping around the house all day. Why don't you call some of your friends?"</p>
<p>Elizabeth sighed and sat back up to take a sip of her coffee. Her mother didn't understand - and couldn't while she didn't have clearance - but Elizabeth irrationally felt that her mother should still have all the answers. "I don't have any friends here, Mom." Once she'd been in Atlantis a year there hadn't seemed any point in renewing old friendships on Earth. Now it had been even longer for them than it had for her. None of them would understand either.</p>
<p>"What about Simon?"</p>
<p>Elizabeth gave her an incredulous look. Did her mother really think she would want to speak to him? A more disturbing thought occurred to her: what if her mother and Simon had kept in touch? Elizabeth shook her head. She didn't want to know the answer to that.</p>
<p>"I know you miss Sedgewick," her mother continued, in a tone was supposed to be soothing, but didn't feel like it any more.</p>
<p>Elizabeth studied her coffee. She did miss him, but not enough to contact Simon. Besides, it had been long enough that Sedge was Simon's dog by now. He probably wouldn't even remember her.</p>
<p>Her mother sighed. "How about General O'Neill? You have to speak to him sometime."</p>
<p>Jack was the one person who would understand, but also the one person she couldn't talk to. After what he did in the SGC, he'd want an answer and she didn't have one for him yet. When she'd been in Atlantis, the promise of something more than friendship sounded like it could be something for her to embrace, but it wouldn't be fair on him to start something and then leave him. She still couldn't face the thought of never going back to Atlantis.</p>
<p>"You know I hate seeing you like this," her mother said, putting her hand on Elizabeth's shoulder.</p>
<p>Elizabeth nodded, but didn't look up. Eventually her mother gave up and left her to her coffee and her thoughts.</p>
<p>She remembered back to that last morning in Atlantis. She'd only had a few hours sleep, but that was normal. Saying goodbye to everyone wasn't. Teyla had been the easiest, after their talk the night before. She'd assured Elizabeth there were good things ahead and said it so confidently Elizabeth had believed her. However, there were good things ahead for Atlantis, too, and she hated to be leaving. She'd promised herself there would be no tears, but her eyes were already wet.</p>
<p>Ronon had helped. He'd lifted her up and spun her around, and Elizabeth had laughed at the sudden feeling of the floor no longer being under her feet. He'd been unrepentant when he put her down, despite her stern look.</p>
<p>Rodney talked a lot, promised things he couldn't deliver and a lot that he probably could. She'd believed him, when he said he'd look after the city because Rodney always did. He'd called it his city, so John had argued about whose city it was and Woolsey had rolled his eyes. Elizabeth had just stood back and watched them, smiling, her eyes glittering with tears.</p>
<p>She'd looked back at the people and place she was leaving, determined not to forget any of them. She'd managed a speech that she now couldn't remember a word of, but she knew her voice had been steady. She'd kept it short though, so she'd be done before she choked on her words. Stepping through the Stargate, she'd refused to look back; not giving herself the chance to change her mind.</p>
<p>And now she was here, in her mother's house, with only her memories and a cold cup of coffee to keep her company. In the background the phone was ringing. It did that every evening, when Jack got home from work. Elizabeth had learned how big a crisis was going on at Homeworld Security based on the lateness of the call. When her mother came back into the living room, carrying the phone, she didn't need to tell Elizabeth who it was. Elizabeth shook her head, but her mother held the phone out anyway.</p>
<p>"He says it's important," she said.</p>
<p>Elizabeth still hesitated, but her mother was unmoving, so Elizabeth was forced to take the phone from her. However, she didn't put it up to her ear immediately. First she took a deep breath, straightened her blouse, and then stood up. She didn't know what she was going to say, but she wanted to sound confident when she did.</p>
<p>"How's Earth?" Jack asked, his tone light.</p>
<p>"Still here." Beyond that she couldn't say, having not ventured out of the house since she got back to Washington.</p>
<p>"I'm glad to hear that, with all the effort we're putting into it. Dangerous place out there, you know."</p>
<p>"No, I don't," she said in a warning tone, tightening her grip on the phone. She wasn't in the mood for his joking when she only knew what she read in the paper and saw on the news, which never told her the whole story. She knew that often it didn't tell her anything at all.</p>
<p>Jack must have picked up on her tone because his turned serious as he said, "There's something we could really use your help on."</p>
<p>Glad he'd dropped the small talk, she was tempted to tell him there was nothing she could help with any more, not even Atlantis, but she was curious. Besides, it would get her mother off her back. "What is it?"</p>
<p>"Classified. I can't talk about it over an unsecure phone line. I'll pick you up tomorrow at seven am." His tone told her he was sure she wouldn't say no.</p>
<p>She wasn't ready to give in to him just yet though. "Where are we going?" she asked suspiciously. She understood that he couldn't give her all the details, but it didn't mean he needed to keep everything to himself.</p>
<p>"The Pentagon. Smart dress," he advised, sternly.</p>
<p>Elizabeth smiled. As if she'd wear anything else to the Pentagon. "I'll be there," she promised. When she ended the call, she realized Jack hadn't brought up anything about their relationship. Whatever else he was, he was a professional. At least she could count on it not getting in the way.</p>
<p>She sat back down and picked up her book. She re-read the same paragraph twice, but now it was because she was wondering what work Jack needed her to do.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>Elizabeth had lain awake half the night wondering what Homeworld Security needed her for. Her first thought had been for Atlantis, but she wasn't the expert on the city any more, not with two years of memories missing. It couldn't be anything to do with the Ancients either, because Daniel Jackson knew more about them than she did. She hadn't been able to think of a single thing she could do that no one else on the planet could. When she ran out of ideas she finally fell asleep; it wasn't much later before she was standing outside her mother's house, caffeinated and curious.</p>
<p>Jack pulled up right on time and Elizabeth got in the car. She was surprised to find that Jack drove himself. She was sure three star generals could have a driver if they wanted, but she could imagine that Jack would want to do something for himself. He had complained more than once about the inactive life of a desk job, although the word he used most often was 'boring'.</p>
<p>"What is this all about?" she asked, as he pulled away from the curb.</p>
<p>He shook his head. "You'll see."</p>
<p>"I really don't like surprises." She glared, but he was concentrating on the traffic and it was lost on him.</p>
<p>"It's a good surprise. You'll like it." He glanced over at her while they were waiting at a red light.</p>
<p>She shook her head. "How do you know?"</p>
<p>"Don't you trust me?"</p>
<p>He sounded hurt, as if she was accusing him of being untrustworthy. It was hardly a question she could say no to, but the truth was that she did trust him. Jack could always be relied on to do the right thing, even at great personal risk. So she said, "Of course I do."</p>
<p>He smiled. "Then trust me when I say you'll like it."</p>
<p>The light turned green and they shot off toward the next intersection. Elizabeth admitted defeat. If Jack was determined not to tell her anything, she wouldn't get it out of him before they reached their destination. She tried her to hardest to think of a safer topic of conversation, but the only ones she could think of involved the state of Atlantis, which she could find out for herself once they were in the Pentagon, and his kiss in the SGC. She didn't have an answer for that yet and there was nothing else going on in either of their lives to discuss.</p>
<p>They were silent for a couple of blocks until Jack spoke. "So what'cha been doing this week?" he asked conversationally.</p>
<p>Elizabeth looked over at him, wondering if he really didn't know she'd been doing nothing. She'd heard her mother talking to him on the phone, although not clearly enough to know what she had told him. He looked innocent enough though, and he was focusing on the road, so she took his question at face value. "Just adjusting to being back on Earth. And thinking."</p>
<p>He glanced over at her, eyebrows raised. "About anything in particular?"</p>
<p>You, she wanted to say, but then he'd ask her what she'd decided. Instead she said, "Atlantis. And what I'm going to do now," which was also true.</p>
<p>He nodded. She thought it was odd he didn't probe further, but was glad, given that she didn't have any answers to that question either.</p>
<p>After that, he lapsed into silence. Presumably he didn't have anything safe to talk about either. Fortunately they were nearly at the Pentagon by this time. Neither of them said anything as he parked and led her through the building. Elizabeth hadn't been to Homeworld Security's offices since the department had been set up; all her meetings had been at the SGC. She had been to the Pentagon before, but not for years and not in this part of the building. All the corridors looked the same - colorless and unappealing - and she didn't think she could remember their route.</p>
<p>The further they went the more people greeted Jack, but none of them gave Elizabeth a second look. She didn't recognize any of them, so they probably didn't know her, or hadn't known she was dead. Eventually, they reached a small office devoid of people. It was just big enough to contain a desk with a laptop on it, and a chair on either side. There was only enough space to close the door if you didn't move the chair in front of the desk too far over.</p>
<p>"This is your office," Jack said, smiling and stretching an arm out to encompass the space.</p>
<p>Elizabeth stood in the doorway and frowned. An office suggested something longer term than what she'd been imagining. With the lack of decoration, she couldn't tell what the occupant of this office was supposed to do. She wondered if it used to be a closet, albeit a large one.</p>
<p>"I've been speaking to a few people," Jack explained, sitting in the uncomfortable chair on the visitor's side of the desk. "We need someone more qualified than I am to liaise between the Air Force and the IOA."</p>
<p>She smiled. However good Jack was at other things, diplomacy wasn't one of them. He didn't have the patience.</p>
<p>"And someone in charge of diplomacy with other races, whether friend or foe," he continued, ignoring her smile at his expense. "I wanted the best qualified person to do it."</p>
<p>Elizabeth hovered in the vicinity of the desk, not wanting to sit down yet, but she was beginning to understand what he was saying. "You're offering me a job?" It wasn't the usual way of doing things, but then neither was being picked up by the Vice President to be taken to the President's office and handed a story (and a lot of boxes of reports) about Earth's dealing with alien races. Look how that one turned out.</p>
<p>Jack nodded. "I am."</p>
<p>She went around the desk and leaned on the back of the chair behind it. "What if I say no?"</p>
<p>"Try it for a day before you decide." He grinned. He knew he had her.</p>
<p>Well, it wasn't as if she had anything better to do. Daytime TV didn't get any less monotonous and Jack had put her in a position where she didn't feel like she had a choice. He'd presented her with a fait accompli and she couldn't just walk out of the Pentagon now. Especially when she was in the best place, the SGC excepted, to find out what was going on in Atlantis.</p>
<p>So she said, "All right", sat down and opened the laptop.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>It didn't feel like a whole day had gone by. This past week the days had dragged on interminably until Elizabeth was glad to go to bed, but then she hadn't had a job or a purpose since she'd gotten back from Atlantis. This day had been busy, though. She'd spent the morning in meetings with various IOA personnel who hadn't been willing to listen to her at first, because of what she'd done while she was ascended. It didn't help that Jack had done a good job of getting their backs up. Although from what she could tell, their main complaint was that he didn't do everything they asked and spend all his days in meetings with them.</p>
<p>Once the IOA had gotten all their complaints out of their system, they'd been able to busy themselves with the problems between the military and civilian personnel on board Destiny. Elizabeth suspected it would be something they'd need to sort out among themselves, but she could at least offer advice based on her experience. In the end they'd decided to set up a meeting between Elizabeth and Camille Wray the next time she used the stones.</p>
<p>Lunch had been a hurried sandwich while she caught up on all the emails that had accumulated during the morning. She'd only just finished eating when General Landry called asking for advice about the trade agreement with the people on P3X-455. Since Elizabeth knew nothing about it, she'd spent an hour going through the paperwork and looking at precedents. She hadn't been able to solve the problem, but she had come up with a proposal that both parties ought to be able to compromise on, as long as they went about it the right way.</p>
<p>By the end of the day, there was still plenty for her to do and she had been used to working long hours, so she would have happily carried on had Jack not poked his head round her office door.</p>
<p>"Ready to go home?" he asked.</p>
<p>She frowned and looked at her watch. "I don't know where the day's gone. I'm sure I only just had lunch."</p>
<p>He grinned, came inside and sat down. "Good day then?"</p>
<p>She nodded. "A lot of the people you already have can handle this stuff, just as they have been, but I think you do need someone to coordinate it all." Although she wouldn't say no to getting stuck into some of the off-world negotiations.</p>
<p>"You want the job?"</p>
<p>"I do," she said, smiling as she shut down her computer. Closing the lid of the laptop and leaning on it, she said in a more serious tone, "Jack, why did you get me this job?"</p>
<p>He shrugged and picked up a snow globe of the Washington Monument she'd somehow acquired over the course of the day. "Because you're the best person for it."</p>
<p>"That's it?" She knew she sounded skeptical. Jack might want to give people jobs without a second thought, but he still couldn't do exactly what he liked, even though he was head of Homeworld Security.</p>
<p>"That's it." He tipped the snow globe over and back again, watching the snow fall slowly on the Monument. He met her eyes briefly and he must have seen her curiosity in them, because he placed the snow globe carefully back on her desk. "And I remember what happened the last time you left Atlantis," he said quietly. "I didn't think it would do you any good to wallow. Neither did your mother," he added, still studying the settling snow in the snow globe.</p>
<p>As much as she knew her mother was only looking out for her, Elizabeth still wished she wouldn't interfere. She wasn't a child. She wasn't ready to admit that he was right yet, though.</p>
<p>When Jack stood up, she followed suit, deciding that there was more than enough work to do tomorrow and none of it was urgent. While she was putting on her coat he asked, "How about dinner?" Despite the casualness of his question, he looked tense.</p>
<p>During a quiet coffee break earlier in the day Elizabeth had wondered whether she'd correctly interpreted Jack's actions just before she left the SGC. So far he'd acted exactly the same as he had before she'd ascended. Now she studied him and the way he looked at her confirmed she had understood his meaning. If they were going to keep working in the same department she would have to make a decision for both their sakes. She had told Teyla that Jack could be a reason to stay on Earth, so perhaps dinner would be a good place to start.</p>
<p>"I'd like that," she said with a smile.</p>
<p>He instantly relaxed. "I'll cook," he said. "The barbecue's been suffering from a bad case of disuse."</p>
<p>She wasn't surprised, since it was early spring. "Is there any time you don't barbecue?" she wondered aloud, as she followed him out of her office.</p>
<p>He turned back to say, "Tastes better when it snows."</p>
<p>She laughed, glad it was at least too warm for that.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>Elizabeth stepped closer to the barbecue, seeking out the small amount of warmth it gave off. When she'd dressed that morning she'd been expecting to spend the day inside the Pentagon and not part of the evening standing outside at dusk. Jack was intently focused on the barbecue as one of the sausages he'd turned rolled back over, so it still had the blackened side on the bottom. Elizabeth hoped that meant they were cooking on the inside too. She wondered if he even knew how to cook in a kitchen. Although she knew everything that was written in his file, that didn't include anything domestic, or anything else that personal.</p>
<p>At last the sausage behaved itself and stayed where he wanted it, so Elizabeth broke the silence that had emerged while he fought with it. "You could just put those on the grill inside." It would also mean they wouldn't end up eating completely blackened sausages.</p>
<p>"Then what would be the point of a barbecue?" he asked, looking up at her. She had her arms folded across her body and was trying not to shiver. But she didn't want to go inside and leave him to it because then what would be the point of her being here? "You cold?" Jack asked.</p>
<p>She nodded. "It's not really barbecue weather yet." Whatever he thought, most of the population would disagree with him.</p>
<p>He divided his attention between her and the barbecue, and then said. "Keep an eye on the sausages." He passed her the tongs, then dashed inside.</p>
<p>Elizabeth thought about poking the sausages, but all they needed was some time to cook.</p>
<p>Jack was only gone a couple of minutes. When he returned he had a white jacket with him that looked warm. He draped it over her shoulders, then came around her to take the tongs back. "Looks good on you."</p>
<p>She smiled and pulled the jacket around her. "Thanks." It was wonderfully warm, but given that he hadn't got anything for himself she wondered if he wasn't feeling the cold or wasn't prepared to admit it. Since he seemed determined to have this barbecue, she suspected the latter was the more likely answer.</p>
<p>He stared at the barbecue, before putting the tongs down beside it and looking over at her. "So what happened in Atlantis?"</p>
<p>She shook her head, not wanting to go over it again. "It's all in the report."</p>
<p>"You know me and reports." He grinned.</p>
<p>She did, but she also knew that at least some of it was a ruse and she was sure he knew what had happened, even if he'd just gotten a verbal report from someone. She leaned back against the short wall next to the barbecue and waited for him to ask something more specific.</p>
<p>"I thought you might decide to stay in Atlantis," he said slowly.</p>
<p>"I thought about it." She put her hands in the pockets of the borrowed jacket. "But it turns out Richard Woolsey's a better commander than I am."</p>
<p>"I'm sure that's not true." He gave her a sympathetic look.</p>
<p>She knew he was lying; he was a better judge of strategy than that. "I got us into a mess and he got us out of it. If it wasn't for him I would probably be dead and the Pegasus Galaxy would be in danger." She shrugged, trying to look as if it was no big deal.</p>
<p>He picked up the tongs again and twirled them in his hands. "You still could have stayed."</p>
<p>She had already spent a week second guessing herself and thinking about what she could have done differently. At the very least, she could have avoided putting Woolsey into a situation that ended with John blowing up an Asgard ship. The last thing she wanted was Jack going over the possibilities with her. "And if I can't be in command, what would I have done instead?" she asked, a little more harshly than he deserved.</p>
<p>He shrugged. "What would you have liked to have done?"</p>
<p>"The one thing I can't do." She blinked away the tears that were collecting in her eyes and turned to face the house so he wouldn't see. This was why she didn't want to talk about it. Before he could labor the point, she decided not to let him continue with this conversation and said, "I'm going inside." She stood up straight and opened the back door, expecting him to say something. But he didn't, not even when she paused and glanced back at him before closing the door behind her.</p>
<p>He was the one person she thought would understand and now it sounded like he didn't at all. It took a few deep breaths before she was sure she wasn't going to cry, although she wasn't sure what she was going to do.</p>
<p>She heard the door open behind her. She only wanted to hear what he was going to say if it was the right thing, though, so she didn't move.</p>
<p>"I know what it's like not being able to do the job you want to," he said softly.</p>
<p>That wasn't what she'd been expecting, but it did pique her interest. She turned to face him and discovered he was standing closer than she'd expected, but she didn't step back. "What would you rather be doing?" He'd had many varied jobs throughout his career and she didn't know which was his favorite. Assuming it was even one of those.</p>
<p>"Going through the Stargate." He looked a little nostalgic - perhaps he was remembering the good times.</p>
<p>"You could still do that." Even if it wasn't the same as getting to do it every day, at least he could do it sometimes. Being the leader of the Atlantis Expedition wasn't an occasional thing: you either were or you weren't.</p>
<p>He shook his head. "I'm needed where I am." He put a hand on her shoulder. "And you're needed where you are."</p>
<p>She nodded. Maybe it was true, but it didn't make it any easier to accept.</p>
<p>"And I want you to stay on Earth," he added. He looked a little lost and she didn't think he was asking just for the benefit of Homeworld Security. "I forgive you for spying on me - I know you had good intentions."</p>
<p>She was tempted to point out that the road to hell was paved with good intentions but she knew he hated clichés. And if, as it seemed, she had helped him by visiting him that meant she couldn't regret it. So she said nothing and gave him her answer by reaching up and kissing him. They'd done it before, but it had always the prelude to something more. Now she could just enjoy the feel of his lips against hers, even if he did smell of smoke.</p>
<p>"I wasn't sure if I made my feelings clear," he said when they parted. He was smiling, just as she was.</p>
<p>"You did." She put her hand on his arm, almost as if they were dancing. "I just needed to give up Atlantis first." She still wasn't ready to abandon all hope of going back just yet, especially now she had a job that meant she might be needed there for negotiations sometime. But she was beginning to think he might be worth the sacrifice.</p>
<p>"Then I'm very glad I got you the job. Which you're perfect for, by the way."</p>
<p>She ducked her head for a moment. Sometimes Jack could be so sweet. He didn't let her hide her smile, though, because he put a hand on her cheek and leaned down to kiss her again. She moved her hands to the back of his neck and kissed him back hard enough to make him forget all about the sausages on the barbecue. She didn't want to stop: he tasted like home.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
			<wfw:commentRss>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/08/07/stargateatlantis-the-atlantis-sacrifice-part-4/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>[Stargate/Atlantis] The Atlantis Sacrifice part 3</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/08/07/stargateatlantis-the-atlantis-sacrifice-part-3/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/08/07/stargateatlantis-the-atlantis-sacrifice-part-3/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 07 Aug 2011 14:57:31 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Daniel Jackson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Elizabeth Weir]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: General Landry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Jack O'Neill]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: John Sheppard]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Richard Woolsey]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Rodney McKay]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Ronon Dex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Teyla Emmagen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Long story]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pairing: Jack/Elizabeth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Series: The Atlantis Sacrifice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Het]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Written for: Sci-Fi Big Bang]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/?p=545</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: PG Beta: Tanaqui American-picker: hhertzof Pairing: Jack/Elizabeth Spoilers: Atlantis season 5. Summary: After recent events Jack and Elizabeth are both keen to resolve Atlantis's fate. Jack thinks Elizabeth's ascension should make that an easy task. Not only is he wrong, but they still have to deal with the IOA as well. Notes: The art [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: PG<br />
Beta: Tanaqui<br />
American-picker: hhertzof<br />
Pairing: Jack/Elizabeth<br />
Spoilers: Atlantis season 5.<br />
Summary: After recent events Jack and Elizabeth are both keen to resolve Atlantis's fate. Jack thinks Elizabeth's ascension should make that an easy task. Not only is he wrong, but they still have to deal with the IOA as well.<br />
Notes: The art for this was created by sexycazzy and can be found <a href="http://scifibigbang.livejournal.com/59425.html">here</a>.<br />
<span id="more-545"></span><br />
Elizabeth stepped through the Stargate into a familiar scene. The gate room itself was empty, but upstairs a mixture of familiar and unfamiliar people sat at their stations. She couldn't hear what any of them were saying from this distance, though from the level of activity she could tell they were busy, but there wasn't a major crisis currently going on. She smiled as she smelled the sea air she remembered so well. All that she could see and hear told her that she was finally home.</p>
<p>"Dr. Weir, it is good to see you."</p>
<p>Elizabeth returned Teyla's smile as she came down the stairs to greet herself and Woolsey. "It's good to be back, Teyla."</p>
<p>Teyla then turned to Woolsey, who was looking amused at Elizabeth's reverie, and said, "The Replicators have not contacted us in your absence."</p>
<p>Elizabeth took a step back, remembering that it was Woolsey who was in charge now, not her, and Teyla must have been filling in during his absence. She guessed that John Sheppard might not be trusted to be in command after what he'd done. At her command. She tried not to think about it and to just focus on the positive aspects of being back in Atlantis in Pegasus. Fortunately, a distraction arrived in the guise of John Sheppard himself.</p>
<p>"Elizabeth," he said, a big grin on his face. "You taking over again?"</p>
<p>She shook her head. "The IOA wants Woolsey to stay in charge."</p>
<p>John opened his mouth, then closed it again. Woolsey had been in Atlantis for a year and nothing awful had happened during that time, so he couldn't have been doing that badly, and John didn't look like he hated the idea of Woolsey staying either. Still, she wondered what he would have said if Woolsey hadn't been in earshot, discussing the current state of Atlantis with Teyla. But now was not the time to ask and she wasn't sure she would like either answer.</p>
<p>"They demoted you," she said, spotting the Major's emblem on his uniform.</p>
<p>"Tends to happen when you disobey orders." He said it lightly, but she could see the hurt in his eyes.</p>
<p>"I'm sorry," she said softly. It was her fault and it would be the second black mark on his record.</p>
<p>He shook his head. "I'm not. I'm just glad Atlantis is back where it belongs."</p>
<p>So was she, but she wished there had been another way. She wished she could remember why she'd felt the need to take such drastic action.</p>
<p>"Dr. Weir." Having finished catching up with Teyla, Woolsey called her name and she turned back to him.</p>
<p>"We should meet in my office," he continued.</p>
<p>She nodded and they all trooped up to Woolsey's office. Elizabeth hesitated at the door. It had been her office once. The walls still looked the same and the desk hadn't changed, but there were other knick-knacks on it and the laptop was new. She could only see the back of the silver photo frame from here, but she knew Sedge wouldn't be on the photo inside it. Woolsey sat in what had been her chair. John and Teyla took seats along the wall as if nothing was different, which to them was true. Elizabeth hesitated for a moment, not sure where she belonged, before she sat beside John.</p>
<p>"We can call the Replicators whenever you're ready," Woolsey said, once they were all seated.</p>
<p>Elizabeth nodded. She wasn't sure she would ever feel ready, but since they were in Woolsey's office there must be details he wanted to clear up first. "I've read the reports," she assured him. "I know they must hate me for tricking them, but I also know how much they want to ascend and they can't do that unless they make peace."</p>
<p>Woolsey leaned forward. "They don't sound a great deal like they intend to."</p>
<p>"I will make sure they do," Elizabeth promised, sounding more confident than she felt.</p>
<p>"Mr. Woolsey?"</p>
<p>Elizabeth looked round to see an unfamiliar young man in his twenties standing at the office doorway. Where was Chuck?</p>
<p>"The Replicators are calling," the technician continued.</p>
<p>Woolsey nodded. "We can put them off if you'd like," he said to Elizabeth.</p>
<p>She shook her head. "They already know I'm here." She didn't know how, but it couldn't be coincidence that they would choose now to contact Atlantis again. She took a deep breath. "I'm ready."</p>
<p>Elizabeth waited for Woolsey to come out from behind his desk before she followed him back to the control room, with John and Teyla close behind. Woolsey nodded at the technician who'd called them in and then pressed a button on the console in front of him. Elizabeth took a deep breath and stood up straight in front of the monitor. John, Teyla and Woolsey all stayed nearby, but out of the range of the camera.</p>
<p>A woman appeared on screen against an unremarkable gray background. Elizabeth studied her. She knew from the reports that this was Lia and that they had once been friends, although Elizabeth didn't know her now. Since she didn't want the Replicators to know this, she smiled and said, "It's good to see you're well."</p>
<p>Lia scowled. "I'm surprised, after what you did."</p>
<p>Elizabeth closed her eyes for a moment and concentrated on not letting her disappointment show. "I know and I'm sorry. But you have to put your anger behind you if you want to ascend."</p>
<p>Lia nodded. "Will you help us?"</p>
<p>Lia accepted Elizabeth's apology faster than she would have expected, based on the hatred in Lia's earlier statement. She didn't know what Lia had thought of her in the past, so she decided to take her question at face value and keep her doubts in mind. But still she hesitated. When she'd been a Replicator and understood what they were going through maybe she would have happily helped them. But since she didn't remember ascending there was nothing she could say that she wouldn't already have told them.</p>
<p>"You believe that we are lesser beings. That we can't ascend," Lia said accusingly, her eyes flashing, apparently taking Elizabeth's hesitation for a refusal.</p>
<p>"No," Elizabeth said quickly, shaking her head. She stepped closer to the monitor, as if there weren't a dozen people in the room listening to the conversation. "I was punished for the actions I took when I was ascended. I'm human again now." She hoped that telling Lia the truth would gain her trust.</p>
<p>Lia frowned at her. "Can you prove it?"</p>
<p>Elizabeth reached out and touched the camera lens above the monitor, hoping that would be enough.</p>
<p>It must have been because, despite her unchanging expression, Lia said, "You can still help us." She sounded reasonable again now.</p>
<p>Elizabeth wasn't sure if that would be a good idea. She didn't know what ascended Replicators would be like, but she still felt responsible for leading them down this path in the first place. "What will you do if I don't?" she asked, wanting to know how much of a threat they were likely to be.</p>
<p>Lia stood perfectly still, but there was a warning sound from one of the other monitors and then the city shook. When Elizabeth looked over she could see a flashing light on the screen.</p>
<p>"Warning shot," John said, quietly enough that the microphone wouldn't pick it up.</p>
<p>Elizabeth looked back up at Lia, understanding the position the Replicators were putting her in. "Then I will," she said. "But I'll have to come to you." It would be easier to negotiate with them face to face and they couldn't risk the Replicators in Atlantis again. It would be far better to only put herself at risk.</p>
<p>"No," John said quickly, looking worried. "You can't go up there alone."</p>
<p>"You may bring one other," Lia said graciously.</p>
<p>Elizabeth looked over to Woolsey, since it was his decision, ultimately. "I'll take Ronon," she said, hoping he was still in Atlantis. Woolsey nodded. "But we'll need someone to fly the Puddlejumper."</p>
<p>"There's no need," Lia said. "We have transporter technology."</p>
<p>Elizabeth raised her eyebrows, wondering just what ship the Replicators had gotten hold of.</p>
<p>"We'll need a little time to prepare," Woolsey objected, coming up behind Elizabeth.</p>
<p>Lia nodded. "You have ten minutes." The picture went blank.</p>
<p>"I don't like this." John joined them. "That ship they're on has a hell of a lot more firepower than the last one."</p>
<p>That did make it sound as if going there would be a bad idea, but Elizabeth looked each of the men in the eye. "They don't have anything to gain from hurting me. I've read the reports. None of the remaining Replicators ever acted against us." She had to believe that they were peaceful, otherwise they might well carry out their threat and she would be doing this for nothing.</p>
<p>"That doesn't mean they won't." Woolsey folded his arms.</p>
<p>"I'll have Ronon with me if anything goes wrong," she pointed out. "And they'll be transporting us anyway, whether we like it or not. They could have done it before now, if they'd really wanted to." So far, they had shown themselves to be trustworthy, so Elizabeth was willing to give them the benefit of the doubt.</p>
<p>Woolsey sighed, while John scowled.</p>
<p>Teyla asked quietly, "Are you sure about this?"</p>
<p>Elizabeth nodded, which seemed to satisfy her.</p>
<p>Ronon arrived, wearing more weaponry than she'd ever seen on him before. Which meant there was a lot more than that concealed on him.</p>
<p>"They make one false move, I'll kill them," Ronon promised.</p>
<p>Elizabeth didn't have anything to do to prepare, except for ignoring John and Woolsey's worried looks and thinking about what to say and after exactly ten minutes, they were transported to the Replicator ship. Elizabeth had been expected to be greeted, but all they were faced with was an empty room. It was just a few feet across, the walls a dull gray, with only a door in one wall to relieve the monotony.</p>
<p>"Something's not right," Ronon said, gun primed, echoing her own thoughts.</p>
<p>Elizabeth looked around. "Can you smell that?" The aroma of recycled air was common to all spaceships, but this one smelled sweet.</p>
<p>"Gas!" Ronon ran to the door and tried to dig his fingers into the non-existent gap around it in an attempt to force it open.</p>
<p>Elizabeth tried not to panic as she looked around for a vent or a way to open the door without using force. There was nothing she could see and she couldn't hold her breath for very long. A moment later she started coughing and sank to the floor defeated.</p>
<p>Neither of them made it out of the room in the two minutes it took before they were both unconscious.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>Elizabeth woke in a large, unfamiliar room. It felt like something she was doing a lot lately, but the déjà vu was dispelled by the sight of Ronon leaning over her and the quick realization that this room was clearly on a ship. She could feel the slight vibration caused by the engines. At least the air in here was cool and clear.</p>
<p>"You all right?" Ronon looked and sounded worried.</p>
<p>She nodded. Her head felt like she'd drunk too much last night, but she expected that would pass. She put her hands on the cold floor and pushed herself into a sitting position. Ronon stuck out his hand and pulled her up when she took it. "Where are we?" she asked, once she was on her feet again.</p>
<p>He shrugged. "Cell of some sort."</p>
<p>She'd guessed that much, despite it being a much bigger room than she'd expected for a cell. The walls held long, angular shapes she didn't recognize as belonging to any race in Pegasus. She ran her fingers down one of the shapes, but it didn't bring back any Replicator memories.</p>
<p>"No way out," Ronon added.</p>
<p>The door was the same as in the last room, and there was no control pad beside it. She turned away from the wall and gave him an ironic smile. "No use having a cell you can escape from." But presumably their captors would want to talk to them some time, otherwise why hold them here?</p>
<p>Just as she was thinking about it, the door opened. Ronon pulled out a knife she hadn't known he still had, but he froze when he saw the two people who came in.</p>
<p>It was themselves. Exact copies of herself and Ronon.</p>
<p>"Who are you?" she asked calmly, not trusting Ronon to do the talking.</p>
<p>"I'm Lia," the other Elizabeth replied.</p>
<p>Elizabeth glanced over at Ronon, whose expression was as astonished as hers. "No, you're not." She'd only just spoken to Lia and that wasn't what she looked like.</p>
<p>"We're Replicators in cloned bodies," Lia explained, smiling.</p>
<p>Elizabeth suddenly felt cold. She wondered when the Replicators' plan had changed. Had she been wrong to tell them she'd descended? Or would they have done this anyway, if she hadn't come to Atlantis? "You think that will help you ascend?" It was the only reason she could think of at that point as to why they'd done this.</p>
<p>"Of course." Lia sounded smooth and confident. It was the same voice Elizabeth used to reassure parties in a negotiation.</p>
<p>Elizabeth shook her head. It didn't sound reassuring to her now.</p>
<p>"I'll kill them now." Ronon took a step forward.</p>
<p>Elizabeth put a hand on his arm. "We need to talk to them first." They needed more information.</p>
<p>He didn't look happy about it, but he stayed by her side. However, he didn't put the knife away.</p>
<p>"Where did you get the technology to do that?" she asked.</p>
<p>"The race that took us from the space gate and unfroze us. Saved us from the fate you condemned us all to." Lia sounded as if Elizabeth should know this already. They must have unfrozen Elizabeth too, she supposed. She wished she'd been able to remember. Then maybe they could have avoided this mess.</p>
<p>Now it was Elizabeth who took a step toward the two Replicators. "Who?"</p>
<p>"The Asgard."</p>
<p>Elizabeth had just enough time to be astonished at the news of there being Asgard alive in Pegasus when the transporter activated again and they found themselves back in Atlantis.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>"What are the Asgard doing in Pegasus?" Elizabeth asked, looking around at the other members of the expedition in the briefing room. There hadn't been time to read all the reports before she came here, so she'd stuck to those involving the Replicators. Given that no one else looked surprised, she guessed there were some important events she'd missed.</p>
<p>"They came here to do research on clones without the other Asgard stopping them," Rodney replied in a tone that suggested she should know that.</p>
<p>She had to think back to the other reports she'd read about the Asgard in the past to be able to fill in the gaps in Rodney's story. Though it had been a few years since she'd read SG-1's reports, she'd always had a good memory and she could recall enough to figure it out. "So they cloned me and Ronon the same way Loki did on Earth."</p>
<p>Ronon huffed and shifted in his seat. She couldn't imagine he was any more pleased about this than she was, especially as they'd knocked him out; something he tended to take personally at the best of times.</p>
<p>There were still holes in Rodney's story. Elizabeth leaned forward. "But when they clone people, they usually clone their brains as well."</p>
<p>"We already know the Replicators can put their minds into human bodies. Maybe they just took the cloned version of yours out and put theirs in." He swept his arm out over the table, as if to indicate how they did it. "I'm simplifying massively, of course."</p>
<p>Elizabeth tried to swallow the lump in her throat and not think about what had happened to the other version of her and whether she'd been conscious.</p>
<p>"They have to be stopped," John said, forcefully.</p>
<p>"And how do you propose to do that?" Woolsey asked evenly. "We couldn't manage it the first time and now they have an alliance with the Replicators..." He trailed off, his inference obvious to everyone in the room.</p>
<p>"And the Replicators have the technology to make humans," Rodney said. "Who knows what the Asgard can do with that."</p>
<p>"Perhaps they can just make Asgard," John suggested. "It would solve their cloning problem," he added with a shrug.</p>
<p>"I don't know if Replicators can ascend," Elizabeth said. "Even in human bodies, they're still Replicators." She knew from the reports that they'd already tried that, but perhaps Lia didn't. Or maybe she thought Elizabeth was the catalyst they needed to be able to ascend.</p>
<p>"More importantly," Woolsey pointed out, "two of the Replicators can now pretend to be Ronon and Dr. Weir.<br />
Is there anything to stop them making more copies of those clones?"</p>
<p>Rodney shook his head. "All they need is the DNA they collected from Elizabeth and Ronon and they can make as many copies as they like. They could have already started."</p>
<p>Elizabeth put a hand to her mouth. She felt sick for having let this happen. Perhaps Jack had been right and she shouldn't have come back here.</p>
<p>"Then we need to destroy them now." John sounded angry. Elizabeth couldn't blame him.</p>
<p>"They can't have gotten far," Elizabeth said. The Asgard ship had left as soon as Elizabeth and Ronon were back in Atlantis, but they'd come straight here to discuss the situation. "I'll go. I can pretend to be Lia."</p>
<p>"I'll go too," Ronon said.</p>
<p>"I'll fly the Jumper," John offered.</p>
<p>Elizabeth smiled at them both, grateful for their support. However, she'd forgotten she no longer had the final say over this, until Woolsey spoke.</p>
<p>"Are you sure you know Lia well enough to convince the other Replicators you're one of them?" He sounded skeptical.</p>
<p>She wasn't sure, but she knew this would be their best chance. "Yes." She raised her chin. "I can do it."</p>
<p>"But can you convince her to delete your DNA?"</p>
<p>Elizabeth hesitated. Her negotiating skills usually involved convincing people to accept a compromise and not to completely change their position.</p>
<p>Fortunately, Rodney spoke before she did. "I think I can help there. I can download a virus that will delete it."</p>
<p>John frowned. "You can do that?"</p>
<p>"I've worked with the Asgard systems plenty of times. I know how they work."</p>
<p>There was silence as Woolsey looked round the table, appraising each of them. Then he nodded. "Be ready as soon as you can," he said.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>The journey to the Asgard ship was quiet and tense. John flew the Jumper; Ronon stared out of the window, occasionally turning his head from side to side, spying for enemies; Rodney double checked his program; and Elizabeth concentrated on memorizing the layout of the ship. As long as the Asgard hadn't changed it significantly, the plans they'd gotten from the SGC should get her to the room with the cloning technology easily enough.</p>
<p>"You sure you want to do this?" John's question broke into Elizabeth's thoughts and she looked up to find it was directed at her.</p>
<p>"I don't have a choice," she said quietly. "It's the only way."</p>
<p>"That wasn't an answer." He stared at her, as if he could see her thoughts that way. She dropped her eyes back to the plans and eventually he turned back to the controls. As soon as he did he said, "Found it," and swung the Jumper over to the right. The Asgard ship came into view, growing larger as they approached.</p>
<p>Elizabeth got up and stood behind John and Ronon; Rodney turned round in his chair to see the view. The Asgard ship looked to be nearly as big as the Daedalus but, where the Daedalus was black, this ship was silver and smooth. To Elizabeth's eyes it seemed far more deadly.</p>
<p>"Don't worry, we're cloaked," John reassured her.</p>
<p>Given what she'd read about the Replicators, she hoped that would be enough to keep them hidden.</p>
<p>"Now it's your turn." John glanced over his shoulder at Rodney.</p>
<p>Rodney went back to his laptop and tapped at the keys. "The shuttle bay should be right in front of you."</p>
<p>As usual, Rodney had worked miracles: directly ahead Elizabeth could see a door opening on the side of the Asgard ship.</p>
<p>"That should put you two levels away from the cloning room," Rodney said. "You sure you don't want me to come with you?" he asked, passing Elizabeth a tablet.</p>
<p>"I would," she admitted. "But the Asgard already know you're not a Replicator."</p>
<p>"Let's go." Ronon was up and ready as soon as they touched down. His hands twitched as John lowered the ramp. Since Replicators never needed to carry guns, Elizabeth hoped they'd both be more inconspicuous if they weren't seen to be carrying any themselves. The tablet she tucked into an inside pocket, where it dug into her ribs.</p>
<p>"Good luck," John called after them.</p>
<p>Elizabeth turned back to smile at John and Rodney. "Hopefully, we won't need it."</p>
<p>Ronon was first out of the Jumper, scouting the area for Replicators or Asgard. Elizabeth followed slowly and just as cautiously. There was no need for speech as they left the landing bay and headed down the corridor. Elizabeth strode as if she was supposed to be here, hoping no one would question her. If they did, Ronon had a concealed gun as well as an anti-Replicator weapon - but as soon as they started shooting the alarm would be raised. Elizabeth wanted to destroy the cloning data before that could happen.</p>
<p>It didn't stop Elizabeth from being nervous as they waited for the elevator. There was no telling who might step off it, but they'd look more suspicious if they avoided the elevator. Elizabeth breathed a sigh of relief when it arrived empty.</p>
<p>It took no time at all to travel up two levels. When the elevator opened they found an Asgard waiting for for it. Elizabeth reminded herself to stay calm and she merely nodded at him as they exited. He stared at her, but said nothing. Elizabeth's heart pounded and it was all she could do not to run the rest of the way. All they could do was hope the Asgard wasn't suspicious of them.</p>
<p>As they made their way along the corridor Elizabeth counted off doors and Ronon kept a look-out around them. He was just as twitchy as she was, but she knew he was professional enough not to shot while they were under cover.</p>
<p>"Here we are," she said, when they reached the fifth on the left. She and Ronon positioned themselves on either side and at his nod she reached out to open the door. Ronon burst in, gun first.</p>
<p>"Clear," he said, and she followed him in.</p>
<p>All the room held was a bed and a console, so that meant the data was stored on the computer. As Elizabeth plugged the tablet in, Ronon positioned himself by the door, ready to deal with any intruders.</p>
<p>Rodney's instructions were simple enough. All she had to do was upload the program and the virus would do the rest. Except when she tried, nothing happened. She tapped her radio. "Rodney, it doesn't work."</p>
<p>"What? That's not possible." Rodney sounded amazed at the idea.</p>
<p>"Maybe they have a firewall or something," she suggested, wanting to be helpful.</p>
<p>"No, I accounted for that."</p>
<p>"What if these Asgard have a different firewall?"</p>
<p>Rodney's pause at the other end suggested she could be right, or she had at least given him an idea. "Never mind," he said eventually. "We'll go to Plan B."</p>
<p>"What's Plan B?" She studied the tablet, but she couldn't see anything else extra that Rodney had put on it.</p>
<p>Rodney didn't get a chance to answer because Ronon said, "Someone's coming!"</p>
<p>Elizabeth kept the tablet plugged in, in case Rodney could do something remotely, but tucked it behind the console. She stayed where she was, hoping their ruse would still work, but she knew it had failed as soon as Lia walked through the door. Ronon grabbed her arm, but she didn't struggle.</p>
<p>"Don't shoot," Elizabeth said to Ronon. Lia was was powerless in Ronon's grip and they had a captive audience.</p>
<p>"I know what you're doing," Lia said. "We've cut off access from this console."</p>
<p>"Can you blame us?" Elizabeth kept her arms at her sides, palms out. She was practised enough at this not to let her disappointment show. "You've allied yourselves with a dangerous race."</p>
<p>"To you, not to us." Lia stood up a little straighter and Elizabeth recognised that stance in her body as defiance. "They have what we need. What you would not give us."</p>
<p>Elizabeth shook her head. "You've done nothing to prove you can be trusted," she pointed out.</p>
<p>"And you have only proved yourselves untrustworthy." Lia jerked suddenly and she fell to the ground, limp. Looking up, Elizabeth realized Ronon had his gun in his hand and had shot her.</p>
<p>Elizabeth's eyes widened. "What did you do that for?" She was annoyed with him - with more time she could have talked Lia round. There was no need for him to kill her.</p>
<p>"She wasn't going to listen," he said, "and there are more coming."</p>
<p>Now he'd mentioned it, she could hear the approaching footsteps. She couldn't tell how many there were, but even Ronon wasn't good enough to take down that many. She silently forgave Ronon for his actions.</p>
<p>"Here." Ronon tossed her a gun, before taking up position at the doorway.</p>
<p>Elizabeth's hands shook as she caught the weapon and turned it the right way round. She didn't ask what sort of gun it was, just crouched down behind the console to give herself some cover.</p>
<p>And then they were coming. An Asgard in body armor ripped the door off, and there were more behind him. Ronon shot them as they tried to enter. The narrow doorway forced them to attack one at a time and though their shields held for dozens of shots, they couldn't move while they were shielding themselves, so it at least held them back and prevented any more from entering around them.</p>
<p>Elizabeth stayed crouched down, wondering how long Ronon could keep doing this before his gun ran out of power or the Asgard found another way in. She looked around and couldn't see another door, but that didn't mean there wasn't a hidden one. She didn't know Asgard ships well enough to tell.</p>
<p>Ronon had taken out three Asgard and was working on a fourth when an explosion rocked the ship. Elizabeth fell to the floor, landing with an "Omph".</p>
<p>"What was that?" she asked, pushing herself back up.</p>
<p>"Elizabeth, Ronon, get back to the Jumper," John yelled over the radio.</p>
<p>Elizabeth was wondering just how they were going to manage that when they were under attack from the only exit when the Asgard backed off, turned and ran. Elizabeth and Ronon took advantage of the retreat and hurried back to the Jumper as fast as they could. The Asgard had gone in the other direction, so their path back to the elevator was safe. They were nearly there when another explosion threw Elizabeth against the wall. Without knowing where these explosions were or what was causing them, she knew they couldn't risk using the elevator.</p>
<p>"Which way?" Ronon asked, looking around and trying to cover all the exits. He must have realized the same thing she did.</p>
<p>Elizabeth stopped to think about where they were on the map. She was about to answer when she heard gunfire. She turned back to see Ronon firing at an Asgard who had come down the corridor after them. Since the corridor was wide enough to fit two Asgard in body armor side-by-side, Elizabeth flattened herself against the wall behind Ronon, heart pounding. From this position she couldn't see what was happening, which at least meant she couldn't be shot. She could at least tell Ronon hadn't been shot either. It wasn't long before Ronon stopped firing.</p>
<p>"Let's go." He matched his actions to his words and then Elizabeth could see the Asgard had fallen and there were none behind him. Yet.</p>
<p>"There's an emergency escape route in the next corridor over," Elizabeth called out, and Ronon picked up the pace.</p>
<p>As they turned the corner she spotted the hatch in the wall just as the door beside it opened and a dozen Asgard piled out of it. Elizabeth jumped back around the corner, out of the line of fire. Fortunately the Asgard hadn't had time to put their suits on yet. She didn't know how Ronon could have taken down that many if they had.</p>
<p>She steadied the gun in her hand, pointing it at the corridor she'd just fallen back from. Her hand shook and she hoped she wouldn't need to use it. If something happened to Ronon she wasn't sure if she could fight her way off this ship.</p>
<p>When her ears rang in the sudden silence, she risked a glance around the corner. Ronon was picking his way over the fallen Asgard. Elizabeth followed him, hoping the footsteps she could hear were just her imagination.</p>
<p>Ronon wrenched the hatch open easily and motioned for Elizabeth to go first. She tucked the gun into her waistband, then swung herself out onto the ladder. She went as fast as she dared down the ladder, not looking down at the long drop below them. Ronon closed the hatch behind them, but she didn't think that would keep the Asgard away for long.</p>
<p>"What if they follow us?" she asked.</p>
<p>"They won't. They'll send someone to meet us when we exit."</p>
<p>That wasn't very reassuring. Elizabeth wiped her sweaty palms on her pants, one at a time, then picked up her pace. They passed one hatch and then the next, which Ronon eased open slowly when he reached it. Elizabeth listened to the blood thundering in her ears and the sounds from the corridor above her.</p>
<p>"Clear," Ronon said.</p>
<p>Elizabeth sighed in relief. She started back up the ladder, and was only a couple of rungs from the hatch when there was another explosion. She cried out as she was thrown away from the ladder. Her feet struggled to find purchase and her shoulder strained as she held on with one hand.</p>
<p>Ronon grabbed her arm and steadied her enough to get her feet back under her and cling to the ladder gratefully. Not that Ronon allowed her to stay there. "Come on," he said, and half-pulled her the rest of the way.</p>
<p>Elizabeth wanted to flex her shoulder to stop it from hurting any more, but Ronon didn't let her go and he set a fast pace for the Jumper. By the time they reached it Elizabeth was panting hard.</p>
<p>"Sit down, strap in," John said, once they were inside the Puddlejumper.</p>
<p>"But they still have our DNA," she said, trying to steady her breathing.</p>
<p>"We gotta go back out there," Ronon added.</p>
<p>"That's why we've got a plan B. Or should I say C?" John grinned.</p>
<p>That explained the explosions. He must have left the Jumper right after she and Ronon had, in order to place some C-4 somewhere on the ship. She wondered who had been so sure her scheme would fail that they'd come up with a backup plan they hadn't told her about, but that question could wait for later, once they were all safe.</p>
<p>With no other options, Elizabeth sat down, and massaged her shoulder. Ronon stayed standing for a moment longer before he sat too, looking no worse for wear. Elizabeth watched John maneuver the Puddlejumper out of shuttle bay thinking of what she could have done differently. There must have been a way of preventing this.</p>
<p>They were only just clear of the Asgard ship when it exploded. She shook her head. "It didn't have to come to this," she objected.</p>
<p>"It was Woolsey's back-up plan," John explained coolly. "Hit their critical systems. We just have to hope they don't have internet."</p>
<p>Elizabeth nodded and stared out of the window, feeling sick at the loss of life that had just occurred. The Replicators and the Asgard hadn't exactly been their friends in either galaxy, based on what she'd heard, but it wasn't as if they were all bad either. With a little encouragement perhaps they could even have been allies. She was sure they all had something to share. But now that was never going to happen. Even if there were other Replicators and Asgard out there, she didn't think they'd take kindly to having a ship blown up. There hadn't been much time for many of them to get out before it exploded.</p>
<p>She had been so sure this could be settled peacefully that she hadn't thought about what would happen if she was wrong. Had the Ancients done something to her to make her forget how to be Atlantis's leader? Or had she just been so preoccupied with what she'd done to the Replicators that she hadn't considered it. She wasn't sure which option she preferred, but it seemed like the IOA were right. She could never be in command of the Atlantis expedition again.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>Elizabeth stood by the window in the empty mess hall, a cup of Athosian tea in her hand. The lights were dimmed enough that she could see her reflection superimposed over the view of Altantis. The lights along the pier made it look like a runway, while squares of brightness dotted around the towers showed which rooms people were working in. It could almost have been any city, but it wasn't. It was her city, once. Not any more.</p>
<p>She heard movement behind her and stayed where she was, hoping the other person had just come in for a drink or a snack and wouldn't engage her in conversation. As the quiet footsteps came closer Elizabeth saw Teyla's reflection in the glass.</p>
<p>"It is beautiful, is it not?" Teyla halted beside Elizabeth.</p>
<p>Elizabeth nodded, not trusting her voice to be steady.</p>
<p>They each sipped at their tea and admired the view. Gradually Elizabeth began to relax, knowing Teyla wouldn't intrude into her thoughts if she knew it would be unwanted. And Elizabeth did want to be able to unburden herself on someone - and Teyla of all people would understand. At last into the silence, she said, "I'm going back to Earth in the morning. There's no place for me here any more." She just wanted to stay one more night while she could.</p>
<p>"If you wish to stay and live with the Athosians, you would be most welcome."</p>
<p>Elizabeth turned to Teyla, surprised. She hadn't even considered that option.</p>
<p>Teyla smiled. "You have done much for my people."</p>
<p>Elizabeth returned the smile, accepting the compliment. It was an attractive prospect to see Teyla's son and live a peaceful life near to Atlantis. She was sure the Athosians would welcome an extra pair of hands, even if her skills were not the ones the Athosians needed most.</p>
<p>However, she couldn't picture herself being an Athosian farmer, living a nomadic life. Despite how tempting it sounded, if only for a moment, she knew she couldn't accept. "It's very good of you to offer, Teyla, but I don't think I can live here and not be in command of Atlantis." She supposed that at least her mother would be happy Elizabeth wasn't living in another galaxy, but she wasn't living her life for her mother's benefit.</p>
<p>Teyla nodded. "I understand." She sounded like she had expected Elizabeth to turn the offer down.</p>
<p>It still left the question of what she was going to do. Even though it had been a few years, Elizabeth was sure she could go back to international negotiating or her Poli Sci class at Georgetown if she wanted, but it would be so mundane in comparison to what she'd become used to. She half-wished she could go back to an existence where she'd never known sentient life existed on other planets. It would at least make her decisions easier.</p>
<p>She shook her head. No, she wouldn't give up her experiences with the Stargate Program and the Atlantis Expedition for anything. Besides, it was always possible there were greater things out there yet to be discovered, although she couldn't imagine what. Also, there was something else she'd pushed to the back of her mind, but it was something that might be worth her going back to Earth for.</p>
<p>"Before I came," she began hesitantly, "someone I've known for a while made me think he has feelings for me that are more than just friendship."</p>
<p>Teyla looked interested. "Do you return these feelings?"</p>
<p>She sighed. "I don't know." Jack was a friend, certainly, and the nights they'd spent together had been fun and left her wanting more, but living in different galaxies made it far too much of a long distance relationship. She still wasn't sure that she wanted a relationship with anyone, though. "I haven't really had time to think about it."</p>
<p>"Then perhaps now is the time to do so."</p>
<p>Teyla's words invited her to tell more and Elizabeth found the quiet of the mess hall made it easier to think. "He's a good friend. He's had every right to hate me on more than one occasion, but he's never been anything but polite." Except when he'd been sarcastic, but for Jack that was practically the same thing. "I don't think he realizes how brave he is."</p>
<p>"But is he good looking?" Teyla's eyes sparkled with humor and Elizabeth laughed at the question. It felt good to laugh after the day she'd had.</p>
<p>"He is," she confessed from behind her tea cup. "And he does make me laugh." Her tone was a little wistful as she remembered those times.</p>
<p>Teyla nodded. "Sometimes that is enough."</p>
<p>Had Teyla always been this wise, Elizabeth wondered, or had she not noticed until now? Either way she was invaluable to the expedition and Elizabeth was glad Teyla had chosen to stay in Atlantis, even after Torren's birth. "I will miss you, Teyla." Tears pricked at her eyes, but she refused to cry when she had company.</p>
<p>Teyla smiled. "You will keep in contact."</p>
<p>It wasn't a question because Teyla knew her well enough to know that she would. So all Elizabeth had to do was nod and the matter was settled.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>[Stargate/Atlantis] The Atlantis Sacrifice part 2</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/08/07/stargateatlantis-the-atlantis-sacrifice-part-2/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/08/07/stargateatlantis-the-atlantis-sacrifice-part-2/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 07 Aug 2011 14:53:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Daniel Jackson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Elizabeth Weir]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: General Landry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Jack O'Neill]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: John Sheppard]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Richard Woolsey]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Rodney McKay]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Ronon Dex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Teyla Emmagen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Long story]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pairing: Jack/Elizabeth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Series: The Atlantis Sacrifice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Het]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Written for: Sci-Fi Big Bang]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/?p=543</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: PG Beta: Tanaqui American-picker: hhertzof Pairing: Jack/Elizabeth Spoilers: Atlantis season 5. Summary: After recent events Jack and Elizabeth are both keen to resolve Atlantis's fate. Jack thinks Elizabeth's ascension should make that an easy task. Not only is he wrong, but they still have to deal with the IOA as well. Notes: The art [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: PG<br />
Beta: Tanaqui<br />
American-picker: hhertzof<br />
Pairing: Jack/Elizabeth<br />
Spoilers: Atlantis season 5.<br />
Summary: After recent events Jack and Elizabeth are both keen to resolve Atlantis's fate. Jack thinks Elizabeth's ascension should make that an easy task. Not only is he wrong, but they still have to deal with the IOA as well.<br />
Notes: The art for this was created by sexycazzy and can be found <a href="http://scifibigbang.livejournal.com/59425.html">here</a>.<br />
<span id="more-543"></span><br />
Elizabeth awoke in unfamiliar surroundings. The sounds of the cars and the sirens outside told her she wasn't in Atlantis. As she looked around the room, she took in the pictures of fish and planes and the photo frames of military symbols. Wherever she was on Earth, it wasn't anywhere she'd ever lived.</p>
<p>She pushed herself up to sit against the headboard, then discovered she was naked. She couldn't understand why. She always slept wearing pajamas and if someone else had put her to bed, they wouldn't have taken all her clothes off. Unless she'd taken them off herself and didn't remember. The dimness of the room suggested it would be dawn, if it was morning - but the clock on the nightstand told her it was evening. </p>
<p>Beside the clock was a photo. She picked it up to study it and though she didn't recognize the woman or the boy in it, the man looked familiar. It took her a moment to recognize him as Jack O'Neill. The photo had been taken some years ago, when he still had brown hair and looked much younger than when she'd last seen him.</p>
<p>So now she knew she was in Jack's bedroom, but not how she'd gotten here. Or where he was. Or even if this was really his bedroom and not some sort of simulation or trick. As she got out of the bed, she wrapped the duvet around herself. It was hard to walk with it dragging on the floor, but she made it to the doorway without tripping over it and stood there listening. She couldn't hear anyone else in the house.</p>
<p>"Jack?"</p>
<p>There was no reply and no movement to tell her anyone had heard her call out, so she was going to have to investigate on her own. Her clothes weren't visible anywhere in the room, so she assumed she hadn't come here by choice. She couldn't think of anyone who was likely to kidnap her, bring her back to Earth, take her clothes and leave her in Jack's bed. That would be far too elaborate.</p>
<p>Since she couldn't continue to walk around wrapped in a duvet, she opened a few of Jack's drawers and was rewarded by finding a clean pair of boxer shorts and a t-shirt. They were far too big on her, but they were better than nothing. When she found Jack, she could explain why she was wearing them, if not why she needed to borrow his clothes in the first place.</p>
<p>There were still no signs that anyone else was in the house as she cautiously headed down the stairs. Even though she was sure she'd never been in this house, it still felt familiar, but she couldn't say why. In the hall, she found the phone and picked it up, before she realized she couldn't remember any phone numbers. She hadn't needed to in Atlantis, and when she was here they were programmed into her cell.</p>
<p>It occurred to her that Jack might have an address book she could use. Just as she put the phone back down, so she'd have both hands free to look, she heard a key in the front door. Her eyes widened and she fled to the living room. There was an empty beer bottle on the coffee table and she picked it up before flattening herself against the wall by the door, heart racing.</p>
<p>The front door opened and closed, and then she heard whoever it was put their keys down. The heavy footsteps told her it was probably a man - assuming they were human at all. As he reached the living room door, she gripped the bottle more firmly, ready to strike and ask questions later. Then a very familiar voice called her name.</p>
<p>"Elizabeth?"</p>
<p>She froze in place, looking at Jack, who was now standing in the doorway.</p>
<p>"How about you put the bottle down and I'll apologize?" he suggested, holding his hands away from his body.</p>
<p>She knew Jack probably had enough training to be able to take the bottle from her before she could move, but she wasn't ready to give her weapon up before she knew what his intentions were. Especially when she looked a lot like she'd broken in and stolen his underwear. "I'm sorry. I couldn't find my clothes."</p>
<p>He frowned, and then looked down at her. By the time he met her eyes his face was a little flushed. "I meant I should apologize for accusing you of not helping. If I'd thought you were going to do what you did..." He put his arms out. "I'm sorry."</p>
<p>She did lower the bottle, albeit unconsciously. "What's going on?"</p>
<p>"Only Sheppard and McKay doing what you told them to and flying the city back to Pegasus." He didn't sound happy about it.</p>
<p>"Back?" She frowned.</p>
<p>He reached out and took the bottle from her unresisting fingers, before his eyes widened. "Elizabeth, what's the last thing you remember?" He sounded worried now.</p>
<p>"The Replicators were attacking and we were about to fly the city away to escape. I think they hit us." She couldn't remember the impact, but she was sure there must have been one. "I'm not sure. I woke up here."</p>
<p>"Elizabeth," he said softly. "That was two years ago."</p>
<p>"I've lost two years?" She must have been injured; that was why she couldn't remember. "How did I get here?"</p>
<p>He shook his head. "You were ascended. You must have descended."</p>
<p>She put a hand to her mouth. She remembered reading reports of that happening to Daniel Jackson, but had never thought she would have the same experience. Her legs felt unsteady and she made her way over to the couch and sat down. "I don't even remember dying."</p>
<p>"I'm not sure if you did." He followed her and crouched down in front of her.</p>
<p>Elizabeth's hands shook. It all sounded plausible, if unlikely. Jack wasn't denying Atlantis existed this time, but this was so similar to the nanite attack on her not that long ago. What if the Replicators had done something to reactivate the nanites inside her? As helpful as the nanite Jack had been before, he had turned out to be the enemy trying to trap her inside her own mind. She wouldn't make the same mistake twice; she wouldn't reveal what she knew. "Can you prove any of it?"</p>
<p>He nodded. "Let me make a couple phone calls. Don't go anywhere, I'll be back in a minute." He smiled, before going back out into the hall.</p>
<p>Elizabeth waited until he started talking, then silently tip toed over to his back door and turned the key slowly. She held her breath, hoping the door wouldn't creak, and was relieved when it didn't. She didn't worry too much about shutting the door behind her - it would be too loud. Once she was outside, she started running, ignoring the cold of the concrete under her bare feet and the gravel that dug into her soles.</p>
<p>After a few steps she found herself face to face with Helia. Elizabeth stopped, startled.</p>
<p>Helia smiled. "I am sorry. We didn't mean to make you think something was wrong."</p>
<p>Helia was dead, she had to be. She couldn't possibly be here, which meant she was another nanite. So Elizabeth turned away from her, but as soon as she'd taken another step, Helia was in front of her again. Elizabeth decided to stand her ground and held her head up. "I'm not scared of you." She hoped she sounded more confident than she felt.</p>
<p>"You have nothing to be scared of," Helia said. "I can show you why you're here." Helia reached out her hand and touched Elizabeth's forehead. Before Elizabeth could shout or run, she passed out.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>Elizabeth woke to see Jack kneeling over her, looking concerned.</p>
<p>"Are you all right?" he asked.</p>
<p>After a moment, she remembered what had happened and nodded. "I'm fine." She sat up. "I've just been given some of my memories back by an Ancient."</p>
<p>He raised his eyebrows as he offered his hand to help her up.</p>
<p>Accepting the help, she took his hand and smiled in thanks once she was standing. "I'm sorry I didn't believe you earlier. I thought it was the nanites again."</p>
<p>He nodded. "I remember. I read the report."</p>
<p>"You read reports?" she asked with a grin.</p>
<p>"Only the interesting ones." He smiled and dropped her hand. "Why don't you come back inside?"</p>
<p>She nodded and followed him. When she'd been trying to run away, she hadn't cared about the cold, but after being outside for a minute she'd started shivering in the wind. Jack's underwear wasn't enough to keep it out.</p>
<p>Once inside Elizabeth curled up in the corner of the couch and Jack went into the kitchen. He returned with a beer for him and a cup of coffee for her. She nodded in thanks and had a sip. It was gloriously hot and warmed her up.</p>
<p>"What do you remember?" he asked, as he sat at the other end of the couch. He put his feet on the coffee table and popped the lid off his beer.</p>
<p>"Not much." She sighed. Most of the past two years were still a blank. "I remember being ascended, but not how I came to ascend or descend. The only thing I remember since the Replicators' attack is visiting you." Although why that memory in particular had been returned to her she didn't know. Surely there would be more useful things to remember. Maybe if she did it would have explained what was going on and why she'd woken up here.</p>
<p>Jack sipped his beer. "The whole memory loss thing is how the Ancients punish people for interfering."</p>
<p>She nodded, remembering reading about it. "What did I do?" If she'd interfered with something, then it must have been something big. Jack was bound to have heard about it.</p>
<p>"You sent Atlantis back to Pegasus." He smiled grimly. "While I was on vacation."</p>
<p>She blinked and searched her memories. The last time she had seen Atlantis it was in Pegasus, just as it had always been. But she also remembered knowing Atlantis had been on Earth while she'd been with Jack. At the time she'd known why, but she didn't any more. She shook her head. It was confusing having incomplete memories.</p>
<p>"You said there was something else out there." He put his feet on the floor and leaned toward her. "A reason why Atlantis should be in Pegasus."</p>
<p>"That's where it belongs." From his hopeful expression she could tell he was expecting something else. "That's all I remember, I'm sorry."</p>
<p>He sighed. "Ascension means never having to say what you know. Descension means not knowing what you knew."</p>
<p>She ducked her head as she smiled. It sounded right, but she couldn't remember enough to offer an opinion on the subject. And there was something else worrying her. "I don't know what ascending and descending will have done to the nanites inside me."</p>
<p>Jack paused with his beer bottle at his lips. "We should get you to the SGC." He put the bottle back on the table and stood up.</p>
<p>She shook her head. "No. I want to see my mother first." It was important to know the status of the nanites, but she was scared what her mother might have done if she'd thought her daughter was dead. She doubted Jack would have gotten the clearance to tell her mother about ascension and what it meant. Elizabeth didn't know if not remembering visiting her mother meant she didn't, or if she had but the Ancients had taken that memory too. Besides, she felt fine for the moment.</p>
<p>He made a face. "You probably shouldn't go straight over. She knows you were missing; you don't want to give her too much of a shock."</p>
<p>She nodded. He was right, but she still wanted to go. She stood up to face him. "I'm not going to the SGC before I've seen her."</p>
<p>He must have known she wasn't prepared to back down over this, so he gave her a searching look. "Give me the number and I'll call her. You can go tomorrow. With an escort," he emphasized.</p>
<p>She smiled and nodded. She could agree to that if it meant seeing her mother.</p>
<p>He found her a pad and a pen from beside a half-finished chess game that she now remembered starting. But the memories from that time weren't quite right: there were still bits missing and, because of that, parts she didn't entirely understand. She shook her head, telling herself she had enough things to worry about already and concentrated on writing her mother's phone number down.</p>
<p>"You can stay here tonight, if you want," he said, as he took the pad from her.</p>
<p>She hesitated, wondering what he meant by that.</p>
<p>"I have a spare room," he added. "And we have a chess game to finish."</p>
<p>She smiled and told herself she should have known his intentions were honorable. "Thank you." If she couldn't go home, then she would prefer to be somewhere familiar rather than on an Air Force base, which usually weren't the most homey of places at the best of times.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>The next morning, Jack left early to go to the Pentagon. Unaccustomed to the sound of someone moving about nearby, Elizabeth had woken up and gone to investigate. She'd smiled at the sight of Jack half-dressed, his hair still wet. He'd buttoned up his shirt as he'd told her things were a bit crazy since Atlantis had flown back to Pegasus. Elizabeth couldn't find it in herself to feel guilty about that. Even if she couldn't remember what she'd done or why, she was glad she'd done it. As much as Atlantis would have been quite a sight on Earth - and Earth quite a sight from Atlantis - it wasn't where the city belonged.</p>
<p>Elizabeth took her time over her shower and, having nothing else to wear, put Jack's boxers and t-shirt back on. Back downstairs she flicked through the newspaper he'd left on the coffee table. It was yesterday's, but that hardly mattered when she'd missed two years. However, none of the stories caught her attention. Once she'd eagerly read all she could about what was going on in the world. Now it just didn't seem important.</p>
<p>She left the paper and as she searched his kitchen for something edible, Corporal Thompson arrived. He told her Jack had sent him to drive her to her mother's house in his absence. The lack of food in Jack's kitchen made her think her mother's would be a better place to get breakfast, so she followed him out to the car.</p>
<p>Thompson wasn't the talkative type, so there was nothing to stop Elizabeth from feeling nervous the closer they got. She remembered, in that nanite nightmare, her mother saying she didn't know what she'd do if something happened to Elizabeth. Well, now it had, and those words were haunting her. She didn't know how her mother had coped. Jack had said that she'd sounded fine when he'd called her last night, but he couldn't tell her more than that, so she was still worried.</p>
<p>As they pulled up outside, Elizabeth examined the house. Her mother had moved there when Elizabeth's father died; although Elizabeth didn't spend much time in Washington she'd been glad to have family nearby. Then, after she and Simon had split up, Elizabeth hadn't had anywhere else to store her stuff, so she'd moved her possessions to her mother's house. Not that she had much; she'd rarely been in one place long enough to accumulate a lot of things.</p>
<p>The house looked much the same as the last time Elizabeth had seen it. The daffodils outside were blooming and the flower beds looked well tended. Elizabeth's nerves let up a little. Her mother couldn't have been wallowing too much if she'd managed that. Still, Elizabeth hesitated in the walk up to the front door. When she looked back at the car, Thompson looked like he was set to stay there all day, which he'd probably been ordered to.</p>
<p>The sound of the door opening turned Elizabeth's attention back to the house. Her doubts vanished upon seeing her mother in the doorway, smiling and she ran into her mother's arms, hugging her tight. Elizabeth thought she looked a little tired but, apart from that, she looked better than Elizabeth had feared.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>"I'm so glad you're here," her mother said, as they both sat in the living room with a cup of coffee each. Her mother picked up a tissue and blew her nose, but her unshed tears hadn't gone unnoticed by Elizabeth.</p>
<p>Elizabeth had to hold her own tears back as she smiled. "I didn't think I'd see you again." She'd had a nightmare about it last night, even though she knew nothing that bad could have happened.</p>
<p>Her mother put her cup down with a shaky hand and turned towards Elizabeth. "What happened to you, sweetheart?" she asked softly.</p>
<p>Elizabeth finished the last mouthful of her coffee as she considered what to say. Although she couldn't have told the truth, even if she had known all of it, she hated having to lie to her mother, especially now. She wished she'd gotten her mother clearance, but it was too late for that. "I was captured," she said. When she'd though about it last night it had been the only reason she could come up with for not being able to call. "The people who captured me manufactured proof that I was dead, so everyone would stop looking for me. The Air Force only came upon me by chance."</p>
<p>She told the story staring at her empty cup and without emotion showing in her voice. Elizabeth was glad she had, because when she looked up she saw only sympathy on her mother's face. She hated the idea that her mother would be upset by what she imagined Elizabeth might have gone through. She felt sick about having to lie about an ordeal she hadn't experienced. "I don't remember any of it," she continued. "For me it's as if the last two years never happened." She smiled to reassure her mother. "And I haven't been hurt. Look at me, I'm fine."</p>
<p>"Oh, you are." Her mother hugged her again. "I'm just glad you're here now."</p>
<p>She didn't seem inclined to let her go, so Elizabeth stayed within the comfort of her arms until her mother pulled away. She was glad too, but there was another reason she was here. "Do you still have my things? I don't even have any clothes." Jack's t-shirt and boxer shorts were rumpled from Elizabeth having slept in them.</p>
<p>"Of course." Her mother smiled and stood. "It's all in the spare room."</p>
<p>Elizabeth followed her there, noticing as she did so the details that told her she really had been away for two years. When her mother opened the door to the spare room Elizabeth found she'd added a painting of Yosemite to it, along with a few photographs of landscapes from places she couldn't identify. She wondered if her mother had been to these places or just liked the look of the pictures.</p>
<p>"They said you were missing and I hoped you'd come back," her mother said, and Elizabeth focused on her, rather than the décor. "And when they said you were dead, I hoped they were wrong. I couldn't give you up just like that." She shook her head.</p>
<p>Elizabeth ignored the spare room and hugged her mother again. She wished she could have done something to spare her mother that pain. She wondered why she hadn't tried to do something while she was ascended, but there was no way to know. "You were right," she said, relieved. She hated to think of her mother living in hope for years, and Elizabeth never returning.</p>
<p>Her mother released her after a few moments and Elizabeth looked around the room again. Aside from the pictures on the walls the room only held an unmade bed, a wardrobe and a chest of drawers. It didn't look lived in and she wondered whether there was anything in it until her mother opened the wardrobe. Inside were the clothes Elizabeth had left here and a few she'd left in Atlantis too. Apart from a couple of dresses it was all pants and blouses. Elizabeth chose a pair of light blue jeans and a black blouse with blue stitching. Then she turned to the chest of drawers for some underwear, but her attention was drawn to the box on top of it. She unfolded the flaps and looked inside to find it contained everything else she'd left in Atlantis. </p>
<p>"The Air Force sent that back when they told me you were dead," her mother said, with a wobble in her voice.</p>
<p>Elizabeth reached in and pulled out her father's watch. It hit her that everything she owned was here on Earth. The way her mother was now Elizabeth could probably stay here for a while and not have to worry about anything. She could catch up on all the sleep she'd missed in Atlantis. With the way her mother was acting Elizabeth could probably ask for anything and get it. But her possessions were just things, her mother was used to her being away for long periods of time and there was only one thing she wanted.</p>
<p>She hadn't even been back on Earth for twenty four hours, but she knew she couldn't stay here.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>At first Elizabeth had been reluctant to leave her mother. Her mother had been so pleased to see her that Elizabeth felt inclined to linger, and Elizabeth wasn't sure when she might see her again. However, after a few of hours she'd started to feel suffocated in the house with nothing to do, especially as her mother was barely letting Elizabeth leave her sight. Elizabeth could understand why, but it was making her feel like a child again.</p>
<p>Fortunately for them both, Corporal Thompson had knocked on the door and told them he had orders to take her to the base. Elizabeth had taken the opportunity to slip out before she could explain where that was or why she was going.</p>
<p>There was another reason she didn't mind going to the SGC - the best way of getting to Atlantis was through the Stargate. She wasn't sure what Jack would say about her going, but she was sure she could talk General Landry round.</p>
<p>Once she got there, though, she first had to spend an interminable half an hour in the sickbay while Dr. Lam checked her over and eventually established that when she'd descended, the nanites had gone. She was relieved to hear the news and was still smiling as she climbed the stairs to the conference room and General Landry's office.</p>
<p>As she neared the top of the stairs, she heard familiar voices, three of whom she hadn't expected to hear here. She ran up the last few steps and emerged into the briefing room to see Richard Woolsey and John Sheppard, with Atlantis's control room behind them, on the screen at the far end of the room. Jack and General Landry stood in front of it.</p>
<p>"Keep us informed," Jack said, and turned the screen off before Elizabeth could say anything. When the two men turned around, Elizabeth was still standing at the top of the stairs.</p>
<p>"What's going on?" she asked. Something must be happening in Atlantis and she was determined to know what it was.</p>
<p>The two men looked at each other for a moment, before Jack answered. "Replicators."</p>
<p>Her eyes widened. That might explain why Jack was here, but she hoped Atlantis hadn't arrived back in Pegasus just to be attacked again. "Are they coming after Atlantis?"</p>
<p>"Yeah." Jack sighed.</p>
<p>"How did they get back to Pegasus so quickly?" It should have taken weeks.</p>
<p>Before either man could answer, the sirens blared and a voice warned, "Unscheduled off-world activation."</p>
<p>"I'll let you explain," General Landry said to Jack, before pushing past Elizabeth and down the stairs.</p>
<p>Jack, looking worried, crossed to the window to peer into the gate room.</p>
<p>Elizabeth could relate to that feeling. She followed him and saw that downstairs airmen were rushing into the gate room and taking up positions with their weapons trained on the gate. "What's going on?" she asked as the iris slid closed.</p>
<p>"Hopefully, it's an ally." Jack sounded preoccupied.</p>
<p>It took her a moment of puzzling over why he would describe the Replicators as allies before she realized he had misunderstood her question. "No, I mean with Atlantis."</p>
<p>"Oh." He tore himself away from the view of the gate room. "Turns out it has a wormhole drive. Gets them places real quick."</p>
<p>She blinked. "Really?" How had they spent three years in the city and not known that? "So they can escape the Replicators," she mused. It wouldn't work for long, but in a fight, that was a useful weapon to have.</p>
<p>He shook his head. "Uses too much power," he said. He might have elaborated but for the sound of gunfire from an SG team returning early. A few shots came through with them, but then the iris closed again, followed by three dull thuds. There seemed to be a couple of injuries, but everyone was still standing.</p>
<p>"Let's sit down," Jack said, when it was all over.</p>
<p>Elizabeth watched him take his place at the head of the briefing room table. She didn't like his expression or his tone, which made her feel she was going to need to be sitting down. So she hesitated, putting off the bad news, and instead leaned on back of the chair on his right.</p>
<p>"The Replicators are after you," he announced, clasping his hands on the table in front of him.</p>
<p>She did pull the chair out and slide onto it then. "Me?" Why her in particular? What had she done to provoke them? She'd been dead, as far as anyone was concerned. If she'd done something to the Replicators while she was ascended, the Ancients would surely have punished her for that before she could ever have helped Atlantis get back to Pegasus.</p>
<p>"I've only read the report," he began, and then stopped.</p>
<p>She frowned and leaned forward. "What is it?"</p>
<p>He took a long look at her, which just worried her even more. "You were seriously injured when the Replicators' beam hit Atlantis. McKay activated your nanites to heal you."</p>
<p>She raised her eyebrows. "I thought I'd died."</p>
<p>He shook his head. "That came later. First you were captured by the Replicators and led a splinter group trying to ascend."</p>
<p>She sat back in her chair, trying to imagine it. She had no memories of it, but she didn't think Jack would lie to her about something as important as this.</p>
<p>"You led them to Atlantis," he continued, sounding like he was reading it from the report, "where one of the members of the group tricked you all. You told the Replicators you'd lead them to another planet with the resources to build yourselves human bodies."</p>
<p>She shook her head. It was starting to sound complicated, but she was sure Jack was simplifying what really happened. "To help them ascend?"</p>
<p>He nodded. "But you tricked them and sent them to a space gate, where they all got frozen. I imagine they're a bit pissed."</p>
<p>"I guess they would be." His lack of emotion as he told her the tale bothered her. "What are you leaving out?"</p>
<p>He put his hands up. "I wasn't there, I only know what was in the report."</p>
<p>She wasn't sure if she believed that was all there was to it, but he was a hard man to get information out of when he didn't want to give it, so she let it drop for now. Perhaps it was just his hatred of Replicators that meant he couldn't deal with her being one of them. "Let me help."</p>
<p>He shook his head. "No. You don't remember anything."</p>
<p>Maybe not, but she was sure there was something she could do. "Just let me go back to Atlantis."</p>
<p>"No," he said, more forcefully, and stood up.</p>
<p>"Then let me stay here." She stood too, hoping a compromise would give her a chance to ask again later. He did at least look like he was considering it, so she added, "Since I'm already here."</p>
<p>"All right," he agreed, grudgingly. "But only for as long as I'm here."</p>
<p>She didn't know how long he intended to stay, but if he tried to leave she would make sure he didn't take her with him. "Thank you." She smiled at him; he didn't smile back.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>After a sleepless night spent catching up on the two years she'd missed, Elizabeth was called back to the briefing room. She'd already concluded it was just as well she didn't remember anything about being a Replicator, given what was in old reports from that time. Reading between the lines, it sounded like it had been a hard life, both for herself and Atlantis's inhabitants. Now she had to put her feelings aside and concentrate only on the facts - for the sake of Atlantis.</p>
<p>She arrived in the briefing room on time and found Woolsey there, standing by a chair and looking a little lost. She wondered why he would be on Earth when there was an impending crisis. John and Teyla were capable of handing it on their own, of course, but he was the commander of the expedition now.</p>
<p>"Dr. Weir!" Woolsey stood, looking surprised. She guessed that if he'd still thought she was dead or ascended, then he wouldn't have expected to see her at all.</p>
<p>"I hear you've been doing a good job in Atlantis," she said, smiling and approaching the table.</p>
<p>"Thank you." He stood up a little straighter at that.</p>
<p>"Shall we begin?" Jack asked, as he came out of General Landry's office, preventing Elizabeth from saying any more to Woolsey.</p>
<p>Jack took the seat at the head of the table and Howard Copley was right behind him, although he sat at the other end of the table. Elizabeth hadn't met him before. When she was last on Earth, he'd been a junior member of the IOA, but if he was at this meeting he must have risen through the ranks. He'd aged too: Elizabeth knew he must be in his forties, but his hair was nearly all gray, which gave him an air of gravitas. The way he held himself as he walked told her he knew that and used it to his advantage.</p>
<p>Now Elizabeth knew why Woolsey was here. He hadn't had anything to do with flying Atlantis back to Pegasus as far as she knew, but the IOA were likely to ignore that. Woolsey looked nervous now that at Copley had made an appearance and was slow to sit down. Elizabeth sat opposite him, not sure yet if she would make things better or worse by saying anything, or even why she was here.</p>
<p>"Tell me what's going on," Jack said, setting aside the files he'd been carrying. Copley opened his notebook and started writing.</p>
<p>Woolsey leaned forward toward Jack and away from Copley. "We had a message from Lia to say the Replicators want to speak to Dr. Weir. They must have been waiting for us to arrive back in Pegasus."</p>
<p>All eyes had turned to Elizabeth after his pronouncement and now she understood why she was included in this meeting. She smiled to try and diffuse the situation a little. She didn't know if she'd known about the Replicators' ambush when she'd been ascended.</p>
<p>Woolsey continued, "So far they've only issued threats, saying that if we don't produce her, they'll destroy Atlantis."</p>
<p>"Oh, for crying out loud." Jack slammed a hand down on the table. "They won't do that; they want the technology."</p>
<p>Elizabeth was inclined to agree with him. "They don't have the fire power to destroy the city, do they?"</p>
<p>Woolsey shook his head. "Not as far as we can tell. But why make those threats if they know we can tell it's a bluff?"</p>
<p>"They're Replicators." Jack made it sound as if the answer was obvious, but Elizabeth wasn't so sure.</p>
<p>"There must be something else," she said. "I wouldn't have told John and Rodney to take the city back to Pegasus just to talk to the Replicators." Although if she'd thought the IOA would make sure it stayed on Earth forever, she had a feeling she might have done just that, but she wasn't going to say it in front of Copley. Jack's expression told her that he didn't believe her, but Woolsey accepted her answer at face value.</p>
<p>"You think they have something up their sleeve?" Woolsey leaned towards her.</p>
<p>She shrugged. It was only a guess. "It's the only thing that would mean the situation would make sense."</p>
<p>"So what do we do about it?" Woolsey looked earnest.</p>
<p>She couldn't tell if he was out of his depth or intimidated by having better strategic minds around him. Before she or Jack could offer any suggestions, Copley spoke up. "Perhaps it would be best to do as they say and send Dr. Weir to Atlantis."</p>
<p>"Absolutely not," Jack said firmly, sounding as if it was the end of the discussion.</p>
<p>Elizabeth looked over at him. "Why not? I can speak to them; try and get them to see that revenge is wrong. It's not going to help them ascend, if that's what they want."</p>
<p>He leaned towards her. "And what if they decide to do that after they've destroyed Atlantis?"</p>
<p>She shook her head and put her hands on the table. "You said yourself; it's just a bluff. They won't do that."</p>
<p>Copley broke into their argument. "Mr. Woolsey, what do you think?"</p>
<p>Woolsey was taken aback for a moment. If Copley was here to evaluate him, he would have to come up with an answer that would satisfy everyone around the table. Given that she and Jack had opposing opinions, that wouldn't be easy. Woolsey looked between the three of them, and then said carefully, "Dr. Weir is a skilled negotiator. Perhaps she would be a good person to send to talk to them."</p>
<p>Elizabeth smiled and whispered "thank you" across the table.</p>
<p>Jack's expression showed that he wasn't happy about the idea. "Dr. Weir is the last person who should go. As long as we don't give them what they want, we call their bluff."</p>
<p>Elizabeth could see his point, but the situation couldn't go on forever. Sooner or later, someone would crack and she had a feeling it wouldn't be the Replicators. They were used to being patient in time scales humans could only dream of.</p>
<p>"I disagree." Copley shut his notebook and sat up straight. "We're better off resolving this now. Dr. Weir will go to Atlantis to negotiate with the Replicators. Mr. Woolsey will stay in command of Atlantis."</p>
<p>She didn't want to take Woolsey away from a position he was doing well in, but it was her city. "Mr. Copley--."</p>
<p>He cut her off before she could even ask. "The IOA have spoken about you. What with your missing memories and the lengths the people in that city go to to protect you, we've decided your position as expedition leader is untenable."</p>
<p>"But--."</p>
<p>"This meeting is concluded." Copley stood up and walked off while Elizabeth still had her mouth open to speak.</p>
<p>Jack also stood and made a murderous face at Copley's back as he walked out. She could imagine how he felt, having someone go over his head and against his recommendation like that, but she also couldn't feel upset at the outcome. </p>
<p>"I don't think you should go," Jack said, turning to her.</p>
<p>"I can help." She stood up to face him. Woolsey wisely made himself scarce.</p>
<p>He shook his head. "You don't remember any of these Replicators, but they remember you." He pointed at her as he said it.</p>
<p>"I've read the reports. It'll do. They'll never know I don't remember." She was sure she could bluff it out with them.</p>
<p>"And you don't think they'll just kill you anyway? They won't care if everyone else in Atlantis is collateral damage." He drew himself up to look intimidating, but it wasn't going to work on her.</p>
<p>She folded her arms. "I can't promise that. But I <i>will</i> do my best."</p>
<p>He sighed, perhaps recognizing that this argument was already lost. "Don't come crying to me when they kill you. Again." He stalked out.</p>
<p>Despite his words, somehow, she couldn't imagine him turning her away if she did ascend again.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>With the weight of her backpack digging into her shoulders, Elizabeth felt like she had more gear than she had the first time she went to Atlantis. As far as the IOA were concerned, she was going to be there for as long as it took to 'neutralize the Replicator threat'. In reality, she didn't intend to come back. She was sure she could get Woolsey on her side, and he in turn could get Copley on her side. Jack was a problem, but even he had to fall in line with the IOA when it came to civilian Atlantis personnel. Besides, once she was there, it would be a lot harder for him to drag her back. She had briefly felt guilty for leaving her mother so soon, but she would write - and she was an adult, after all. She didn't have to stay by her mother's side all the time.</p>
<p>The black uniform was new, but she was getting used to it. Along with a couple of spare uniforms, she'd also packed all the reports she could get hold of, hoping to have some time to read them. There was just enough space in her backpack for her toiletries and the the few days' worth of clothes she'd brought to the SGC with her. It was everything she would need for now. Anything else she could get in Atlantis or have sent later.</p>
<p>The only problem she had now was Jack, who was standing in the corridor on the way to the gate room. Since the meeting four hours ago he'd tried to talk her out of going every hour and she didn't feel like going another round. There was another way to the Gate, but he'd already seen her and he would just run after her, or ambush her again.</p>
<p>She sighed and stopped in front of him. She was determined to get the first word in. "Jack--."</p>
<p>But he spoke over her. "I just came to say good luck. And goodbye."</p>
<p>She blinked. She wondered how much he'd guessed about her intentions given that she hadn't mentioned them to anyone. But she didn't ask. That way she had some deniability. "Thank you." She smiled, relieved he hadn't come here to argue.</p>
<p>He stepped closer, looking at the most recent Atlantis reports she held, which she'd found only after she packed. She assumed he was going to take them off her, so she held on tighter to them. But he didn't. Instead he looked back up at her face, then leaned in and kissed her on the cheek.</p>
<p>It wasn't something he'd ever done before, so she wondered why he'd done it this time. "Jack?" she asked.</p>
<p>He pressed a hand to her cheek and said, "I'll be here if you come back."</p>
<p>Now she was even more surprised. It was a side of Jack she'd only seen once before, when she was living on Earth. Back then, she'd wondered if he'd wanted more from their relationship, but she'd been too upset about leaving Atlantis to pursue it. Then they'd ended up back in different galaxies again and everything had gone back to the way it was.</p>
<p>Her surprise must have shown on her face because he smiled, and then dropped his hand before turning around and walking away as if nothing happened. She was about to call out after him when she heard footsteps behind her. She didn't want anyone to overhear that conversation, so she let him go.</p>
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		<title>[Stargate/Atlantis] The Atlantis Sacrifice part 1</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/08/07/stargateatlantis-the-atlantis-sacrifice-part-1/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/08/07/stargateatlantis-the-atlantis-sacrifice-part-1/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 07 Aug 2011 14:49:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Daniel Jackson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Elizabeth Weir]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: General Landry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Jack O'Neill]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: John Sheppard]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Richard Woolsey]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Rodney McKay]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Ronon Dex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Teyla Emmagen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Long story]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pairing: Jack/Elizabeth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Series: The Atlantis Sacrifice]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Het]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Written for: Sci-Fi Big Bang]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/?p=539</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: PG Beta: Tanaqui American-picker: hhertzof Pairing: Jack/Elizabeth Spoilers: Atlantis season 5. Summary: After recent events Jack and Elizabeth are both keen to resolve Atlantis's fate. Jack thinks Elizabeth's ascension should make that an easy task. Not only is he wrong, but they still have to deal with the IOA as well. Notes: The art [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: PG<br />
Beta: Tanaqui<br />
American-picker: hhertzof<br />
Pairing: Jack/Elizabeth<br />
Spoilers: Atlantis season 5.<br />
Summary: After recent events Jack and Elizabeth are both keen to resolve Atlantis's fate. Jack thinks Elizabeth's ascension should make that an easy task. Not only is he wrong, but they still have to deal with the IOA as well.<br />
Notes: The art for this was created by sexycazzy and can be found <a href="http://scifibigbang.livejournal.com/59425.html">here</a>.<br />
<span id="more-539"></span><br />
"Gah!" Jack O'Neill had been trained not to react to surprises, but none of his experiences had prepared him for the sight of the ghost of Elizabeth Weir sitting at the end of his bed. As his eyes adjusted to the sudden brightness of his bedside light he could see she looked just as he remembered. Even though her shirt seemed fancy it was more casual than he'd seen her dress. He didn't know if that said more about the number of times they'd met outside of work or about how she liked to dress.</p>
<p>"Now I know I'm going crazy. I'm imagining there's a dead woman in my bedroom." He ran a hand over his face and tried not to yawn. He hadn't been sleeping well; that would explain the vision.</p>
<p>Elizabeth smiled and shook her head. "I'm not dead. I've ascended."</p>
<p>"You're a hallucination. You would say that." He reached out for the t-shirt he'd casually thrown on a chair and pulled it over his head. After all, he was half-naked with a woman in his bedroom, even if there was no way she was really here.</p>
<p>"I am real, Jack." Her gaze followed his movements and he began to have serious doubts about his ability to fantasize women in his bedroom. Not that he wasn't so tired he couldn't imagine a naked woman, especially one he'd seen a couple times.</p>
<p>She had a pleading look in her eye that he'd never been very good at resisting. He wondered if she knew that. He sighed and leaned back against the headboard. "To what do I owe the pleasure?" Although he was still withholding judgement on that point and it showed in his voice.</p>
<p>She gave a small smile, before folding her hands in her lap. Her expression turned serious. "I'm worried about you. You've been stressed lately."</p>
<p>"Because being head of Homeworld Security is not a stressful job." He laced his words with sarcasm, remembering back to this morning's argument with the IOA and the afternoon meetings about Destiny that he'd been trying to forget.</p>
<p>She leaned forward. "I'm serious, Jack."</p>
<p>"So am I." Okay, so he wasn't always a serious kind of guy, but he meant what he said.</p>
<p>"I don't want to see you end up like General Hammond."</p>
<p>Despite her concerned expression he sat up straight. That was a low blow. General Hammond's heart attack hadn't necessarily been caused by stress. Not when he'd been retired for four years before. "Maybe I don't appreciate you coming in here, watching me sleep."</p>
<p>Elizabeth looked contrite at that. "I'm sorry." Her fingers traced along the duvet by his leg. As Jack watched he could see that sometimes they hovered above it and sometimes dipped below it without him feeling a thing. "There's just so much I can't do now and I thought this would be the one thing I could do to help."</p>
<p>Now he felt guilty. Maybe she did care - he was pretty sure she had once - but she wasn't going the right way about it. "You can help."</p>
<p>Her hand stopped moving and her interested gaze met his eyes.</p>
<p>"You can convince the IOA to let Atlantis go back to Pegasus and find a way for Destiny to dial home." He counted his two biggest problems right now off on his fingers.</p>
<p>She sighed. "I wish I could."</p>
<p>He believed her - she looked sincere and he did have some experience of trying to convince ascended beings to do something they didn't want to. Or wouldn't: he was never sure which of those was true. He let it go for now: he was too tired to come up with any good arguments. "Ascension's not all it's cracked up to be, huh?"</p>
<p>"No." She smiled. "But it's better than being dead."</p>
<p>"I don't know about that." He didn't think he'd last five minutes if he was ascended and couldn't do anything.</p>
<p>She frowned. "You'd rather die?"</p>
<p>He winced. "Can we talk about something a little less morbid?"</p>
<p>"I'm sorry." Her shoulders slumped, but she didn't come up with another topic.</p>
<p>Jack wasn't sure what there was to talk about when they didn't have the Stargate program in common any more. He stared at her while she self-consciously straightened her shirt. "I'm going to watch hockey," he decided. It wasn't as if he was going to get to sleep any time soon and he was sure there was a re-run of a game on ESPN at this time of night.</p>
<p>Elizabeth just nodded and stayed where she was while he got up and put his pants on. He wasn't sure what her plans were, but when he reached the living room she was already sitting on the couch. He sat beside her and switched the TV on. He already knew the result of the game, but he didn't think he'd be able to concentrate on it anyway.</p>
<p>"If you want someone to talk to, I'm not going to tell anyone."</p>
<p>He glanced over at her. Tempting as her offer was, it wasn't talking that would solve his problems. Or rather it would, but it wasn't Elizabeth he needed to be talking to. "Let's just watch the game," he said.</p>
<p>She nodded and kept quiet after that.</p>
<p>He only half concentrated on the game, thinking while he watched it of methods he could use to persuade Elizabeth to do what he wanted her to. He still hadn't thought of anything guaranteed to work by the time he fell asleep. When he woke up, his back protesting, the game had finished and Elizabeth had gone.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>Jack was beginning to wonder if it was déjà vu when, for the second night in a row, he had a feeling of being watched while he was unsuccessfully trying to sleep. He lay on his back, breathed deeply and listened to the distant sounds of traffic and sirens that told him not everyone in the city was asleep. Although it wasn't comforting to know that. Clearing his mind only reminded him of yet another IOA meeting he'd had today in which Copley had again refused to bend at all about Atlantis. Thinking of him made Jack wonder if last night's visit from Elizabeth had been a hallucination or a dream and if tonight it would be Copley at the end of his bed.</p>
<p>He couldn't stand the prickling feeling on the back of his neck for another minute, so he reached out and switched on the bedside lamp. As he shaded his eyes from the light, he could see Elizabeth sitting at the end of his bed, looking unaffected by the sudden brightness and more awake than she had last night. Ascension clearly agreed with her.</p>
<p>"Hello, Jack," she said, smiling. She showed no signs of being uncomfortable at being in his bedroom again. Perhaps she had no reason to be, but he did.</p>
<p>This was officially creepy now. "What're you doing?" His tiredness made his question sound more long-suffering than the slightly pissed he was going for.</p>
<p>"Nothing." Although he thought she looked a little guilty and her refusing to meet his gaze confirmed that she was lying.</p>
<p>He rolled his eyes. "Is watching me sleep really that interesting?" He might not have minded if there had been sex first, but he hadn't slept with Elizabeth in years and theirs hadn't been that sort of relationship in the first place.</p>
<p>"But you weren't sleeping, Jack." Now she sounded concerned.</p>
<p>He sighed. It wasn't that he was unhappy to see her, but she could pick her moments better. Like the daytime, for example. "Can I expect you to appear in my bedroom every night?"</p>
<p>She shrugged. "That depends on whether you sleep. I think it's the stress that's keeping you awake."</p>
<p>As if he didn't know that. "You know what would relieve some of that stress?" He left the question open, because they'd already had this discussion last night.</p>
<p>She shook her head. "I can't help you with Atlantis or Destiny."</p>
<p>He sighed. "Can't or won't?"</p>
<p>"I wish I could."</p>
<p>Her expression and tone were pleading, so he dropped it. For now. But if she continued to refuse do anything to help Atlantis or Destiny, he probably wasn't going to be catching up on his sleep any time soon. He certainly had no intentions of discussing his feelings with her, even if that would help. He tried to skirt around the subject instead. Besides, he was curious. "How'd you come to ascend? Last I heard, you were a Replicator."</p>
<p>"I was," she whispered, and turned her head away to look at the patterns on the drapes caused by the headlamps of passing cars.</p>
<p>When he sat up, lack of clothing be damned, he could see she had a haunted look on her face and he felt guilty for bringing up painful memories. He reached out a hand to touch her on the arm before he remembered he couldn't. "It can't have been easy," he said softly.</p>
<p>She turned back to smile at him. "Given the choice I wouldn't have chosen that life. For a while I hoped for rescue, but I couldn't sit by and do nothing, so in the end I found my own path."</p>
<p>He gave her a small smile. In her position he didn't know what he would have done. But from what he'd heard, Elizabeth had been fairly well adjusted, considering. More than he'd expected, but that was one of Elizabeth's strengths, to be able to live anywhere. "So you ascended?"</p>
<p>She nodded.</p>
<p>"How did you come to be unfrozen?" That was the part he still didn't understand. He was pretty sure you had to have some part of your brain working to be able to ascend.</p>
<p>"I can't tell you that," she said quickly and in a tone that suggested she wouldn't welcome any further discussion on the subject. She stood up and he found he was looking at her back, which was a far less welcome sight.</p>
<p>"Right." He lay back down. "What <i>can</i> you do?"</p>
<p>She said nothing for a minute, but the distant expression on what he could see of her face told him she was thinking about the question. He was starting to wonder if she was going to answer at all when she turned round to face him again. "I can tell you that you need to convince the IOA to let Atlantis go back to Pegasus."</p>
<p>As if he didn't have most of the personnel in Atlantis telling him that on a daily basis. Woolsey at least was quiet on that front, but he was sure Colonel Sheppard and Dr. McKay had some sort of tag team annoying going on. "And how you do propose I do that?" She was the negotiator, not he. So far he'd been unable to get the IOA to do anything they didn't want to do. They were a law unto themselves, with Copley the most unbending of all of them.</p>
<p>"We woke the Wraith up." She clenched her fists and took a step toward him. "We made the Pegasus Galaxy more unsafe than it was before. It's our duty to look after the people in it." Her face was more animated by this speech than it had been about anything she'd said so far tonight.</p>
<p>Despite everything, he couldn't help but smile. It was the most passionate thing he'd heard her say in the past two days. He'd forgotten how well she could sway him on the strength of her convictions if he let her. If only she could say it to the IOA - they were the ones who couldn't understand the expedition's position. But he didn't think the IOA would be so accepting of an ascended person, even if Elizabeth agreed to talk to them, which he was fairly sure she wouldn't. "But what about this galaxy?" It wasn't that he disagreed with her; he just needed to hear her answer to the IOA's arguments, which were also pretty convincing. The Milky Way was important too.</p>
<p>She took a step forward, arms out. "You have ships. The only technologically advanced societies we've met in Pegasus are all out for their own gain."</p>
<p>He shook his head. If only they still had the chair, this argument would have been solved long ago. "That's nothing I haven't said to the IOA already. I need a better reason."</p>
<p>She lifted her chin. "You can't keep a city the size of Atlantis hidden on Earth forever."</p>
<p>He frowned at her, wondering if she knew that was his biggest source of stress at the moment. She looked innocent enough, but that didn't tell him anything. "Just because something's hard work doesn't mean it's wrong. We can always go public about the Stargate." It had been discussed before.</p>
<p>"Many people will be hurt if Atlantis stays here." She sounded as if she really believed that.</p>
<p>He raised his eyebrows to invite her to continue, but she just bit her lip and looked away from him again. There was more there - a lot more - but getting her to reveal it would be hard. He wondered if he could catch her off guard, but to do that he'd have to give her a chance to forget this conversation first, so he got up. This time when he reached the living room she wasn't there and he was disappointed she'd walked out on him. However, after a minute of a mind-numbing hockey re-run, he saw something move out of the corner of his eye.</p>
<p>He glanced over at her. She appeared to be watching the TV with more enthusiasm than he was. "I thought you didn't like hockey."</p>
<p>"I'm willing to learn." She didn't look away from the screen.</p>
<p>He raised his eyebrows, surprised.</p>
<p>She turned to him and smiled. "I know the aim is to hit the ball in the goal, but that's about it."</p>
<p>"Puck," he corrected her. "It's called a puck."</p>
<p>She nodded. Then after a minute of watching the game she asked, "Are they fighting?"</p>
<p>He laughed. She really didn't know anything about hockey. But he ended up having a pleasant night explaining the rules to her, completely forgetting his hidden agenda, before he fell asleep on the sofa again.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>Despite his tiredness, Jack hadn't rushed to go to bed tonight. After the past two nights he'd been hoping Elizabeth would make an appearance before he went. He'd enjoyed her company and he wanted more answers, but he wished she wouldn't wait until he was trying to sleep. So tonight he stayed up watching late night TV. Having flicked through all the channels and found nothing interesting on any of them he'd ended up watching hockey again, but after last night it didn't feel the same without Elizabeth beside him to share the excitement with. It wasn't helping to keep him awake either and he was nearly falling asleep on the couch by the time he gave up and went to bed. Where he suddenly felt awake because the universe hated him. So he lay in the dark staring up at the ceiling, wondering if she was going to turn up.</p>
<p>Even if she didn't tell him anything useful again, he still wanted to see her. They'd been friends once, even if they'd spent most of that time in different galaxies. He'd thought she understood him. He'd understood her once, although he was less sure now.</p>
<p>Since he was getting nowhere, he turned on the light, just to see if it would make her appear. She wasn't at the end of his bed, but when he slumped back against the pillows, more disappointed than he'd expected, he found she was lying next to him, in red cotton pajamas. They suited her, he thought, then had to remind himself she was ascended. "What's all that about?" he waved a hand in her general direction.</p>
<p>She looked down at herself. "It's night time."</p>
<p>"You could come in the day, you know," he said, in a tone that suggested that was an obvious solution.</p>
<p>She shook her head. "I have other people to see."</p>
<p>He raised himself up on one elbow. For someone who refused to take any action, she was sure doing a lot. "Anyone I know?" he asked casually.</p>
<p>She hesitated before she answered. "I shouldn't say."</p>
<p>He raised his eyebrows. "Forbidden, is it?" he asked, his tone making it clear he knew it was. When Daniel had visited him in Ba'al's prison, he'd told Jack he wasn't allowed to be there.</p>
<p>She looked over to the door. "I'm not doing anything. Just talking."</p>
<p>He stared over at the door, frowning. There wasn't anyone there. The shadows didn't move and he wondered if she was answering him or someone he couldn't see.</p>
<p>"So how's work?" she asked, turning back to him before he could ask what was going on.</p>
<p>"It's been better." He decided to go along with her and let her comment go. "I could use some help."</p>
<p>"I'm sorry, Jack."</p>
<p>She looked guilty and then he felt guilty for making her feel guilty. And talking about work wasn't going to help him get to sleep, unless she came up with some information he could use, which was unlikely. "Let's watch hockey," he suggested, getting up. Tonight, in anticipation, he'd worn sweats and a t-shirt to bed.</p>
<p>She nodded and this time she followed him silently to the living room. He put the TV on and was flicking through the channels, looking for ESPN, when she said, "Oh, can we watch curling?" It had flashed up on the screen for a moment as he'd worked through the channels.</p>
<p>Surely she could go and watch any curling game she wanted any time she liked. But she looked so excited at the prospect that he left the curling on and put the remote control on the coffee table. "You like curling?" He was surprised she'd be interested in a sport like that.</p>
<p>"I rarely get to see it, but it's exciting." She turned from him to the TV, sitting forward in her seat.</p>
<p>He tried to work out what she saw in it, but the TV was showing four men in checked trousers standing in a huddle, talking. Jack had seen some curling, but he'd rarely paid much attention to it. He knew roughly what the goal of the game was, but not how the players went about it. Which he supposed was a lot like Elizabeth's knowledge of hockey before last night. "Really exciting," he said sarcastically.</p>
<p>"But it is." She got up and went over to the TV, which was now showing an overhead image of red and yellow stones clustered around concentric circles. "It's red's last stone and in order to win this end they're either going to have to get their stone in here" -she pointed to the middle of the circles- "and hope yellow misses with their last stone. Or they can try and block yellow's route in, but it means going around this stone here and not hitting this one on the way round." She indicated the route and the problem stone, her finger nearly touching the screen. "And even then that would only get them two points."</p>
<p>"Huh." He sat forward and listened intently to her analysis, which was pretty good for only a couple minutes of looking at the screen. "Hoping your opponent will screw up isn't a good idea." He never bet on that outcome.</p>
<p>She nodded. "It depends on how well their skip has been throwing so far, and we haven't seen enough of the game to know that." She came back to sit beside him as they watched the red skip throw his stone. Once it was halfway down the ice Jack could tell he'd gone for the second shot Elizabeth had suggested. He was a tiny bit off, but it made all the difference to where the stones ended up. "Now they have to hope yellow miss too," she said, "and perhaps they'll scrape two points from this end."</p>
<p>"I think I get why you like it," he said, as the yellow skip played his shot perfectly and his team went up by four points.</p>
<p>She smiled. "I'm surprised you haven't watched more of it before. It's about strategy as much as skill."</p>
<p>He shrugged. "I don't usually have time to watch much TV." This wasn't getting him any more sleep either, but it was more interesting than any other channel he'd tried tonight. Besides, if he slept, Elizabeth would probably leave and he much preferred the idea of discussing curling tactics with her.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>Jack rubbed his forehead and drained the last drop of his beer before putting the empty bottle on the coffee table beside its twin. The beer hadn't helped with the headache he'd gotten after spending most of the day talking to members of Destiny's crew, meeting with people about Destiny and the daily argument with the IOA over Atlantis. Then just when he thought the day couldn't get any worse, the SGC had nearly been taken over when a negotiation went wrong and he'd had to deal with the fall out from that. It had all turned out to be a misunderstanding about grapes, which was just peachy.</p>
<p>He resisted the urge to have another beer. Partly because it would mean getting off the couch and going into the kitchen, but mostly because he'd already had a few worried comments today about looking tired. Being hungover tomorrow wouldn't help. The Simpsons episode he was watching to try and take his mind off things in Elizabeth's absence was a re-run, but didn't matter because he wasn't concentrating on it anyway.</p>
<p>It was uncanny how thinking about Elizabeth gave him that sensation of being watched. Then he saw a shadow move out of the corner of his eye and when he looked away from the TV she was sitting next to him - fully dressed this time. "Are you reading my mind?" he asked, disturbed by the idea that she might be able to.</p>
<p>She shook her head. "Even ascended beings can't do that."</p>
<p>"Good," he said, in a tone that suggested it should stay that way.</p>
<p>She frowned at the empty beer bottles and he prepared himself for that line of questioning. He was surprised when she asked instead, "What are you watching?"</p>
<p>She looked genuinely interested in the answer, so although he couldn't work out how she didn't know, he said, "The Simpsons."</p>
<p>"Oh."</p>
<p>She sounded like it was a revelation, so he looked over at her. Surely everyone had seen enough of The Simpsons to recognize it when they saw it. "Not a fan?"</p>
<p>She shook her head. "I've never really had time to watch much TV."</p>
<p>He shrugged. "Neither do I." Despite the amount of late night TV he'd been watching recently. His life wasn't usually like this. Including the visits from an ascended Elizabeth Weir.</p>
<p>But she clearly wasn't a fan, because after a few minutes, she got up and wandered around his living room. He kept one eye on her, but it wasn't as if she could touch anything and he didn't have any secrets on display.</p>
<p>"Do you play?" she asked, when she stopped by the chess board he'd set up a while ago and left to gather dust in a corner of the table not filled with the bills he'd been meaning to do something with for months.</p>
<p>"Not for a while." The last time had been with General Landry when he'd first taken over at the SGC. It was hard to find good partners to play with.</p>
<p>"I haven't either." The wistful tone in her voice told him that she found chess more interesting than The Simpsons.</p>
<p>He didn't feel up to thinking too hard at this time of night after a couple of beers, but he didn't want to refuse a simple request from Elizabeth. So he said, "All right." He left the TV on in the background as he went over and pushed the pieces back to their correct positions. "But I'm not going easy on you," he warned her.</p>
<p>She smiled and sat down at the table. "In that case, I promise not to go easy on you either."</p>
<p>He gave her a suspicious look, wondering just how good she was. Or how good she thought he was. He offered her white anyway, then moved the pawn she pointed to. "You been to Destiny at all?" He countered with one of his pawns.</p>
<p>She waved her hand through the pieces to show where she wanted her king's knight to move to. The lack of thought beforehand told him that she at least knew a few opening moves. "I have."</p>
<p>He looked up at her, still holding the knight. When she didn't elaborate he raised his eyebrows. "And?"</p>
<p>"It's an interesting ship," she said casually.</p>
<p>He rolled his eyes and wondered just what she meant by 'interesting'. "With some interesting people on it, who may be in danger."</p>
<p>"Oh, come on Jack. I know you've talked to them using the Ancient communication stones. It's not like the first year we went to Atlantis when we had no way of communicating with Earth."</p>
<p>He placed the knight down with more force than necessary. "Talking is all very well. A way of getting them supplies would be better."</p>
<p>"I can't help with that." She didn't sound nearly sorry enough about it to appease him. All she'd told him so far was what she couldn't do and he was tired of hearing it.</p>
<p>"But you can." He stood up. "You can dial the ninth chevron. You could even wipe out the Wraith if you wanted."</p>
<p>She shook her head. "I don't want to. The Wraith aren't all bad. Look how they've helped us in the past."</p>
<p>He folded his arms. "And they eat humans."</p>
<p>She sighed and said in a conciliatory tone, "Why don't you sit down and play?"</p>
<p>He wasn't going to stand for that. "You don't want to, that's your problem." He pointed his finger at her. "You have all this power and all you do is sit by and watch people die."</p>
<p>"Now that's not fair." She stood up too, anger in her eyes. "I can't do anything and you know it."</p>
<p>"Oh, really?" He leaned forward to intimidate her, but she just folded her arms and stood her ground. "It didn't stop Daniel."</p>
<p>She took a deep breath and stepped away from the table. When she spoke she sounded calmer. "I came to help you, Jack."</p>
<p>"No, you came to spy on me and refuse to do anything to help."</p>
<p>She looked away, but not before he could see the hurt in her eyes. He refused to feel guilty about it. "If that's what you think, I should go."</p>
<p>"Good. Leave me in peace."</p>
<p>She vanished, leaving the chess game half-played. He was angry at the empty space she'd left for a minute, before he sat down hard on the seat she'd vacated and ran his hands over his face. After a minute he gave up waiting for her to return and went back to the couch. By the time The Simpsons marathon had finished she still hadn't come back. He didn't regret what he'd said, but he did regret the way he'd said it. He really wanted to speak to her again and clear the air.</p>
<p>When he eventually went to bed their argument ran through his head and he thought of all the things he should have done differently. Not that it made any difference without her to tell them to, He tried turning the light off and on, since that had worked the past few nights, but nothing happened tonight. He ended up having even more of a sleepless night than usual.</p>
<p>Once he woke up, he found himself hoping she would turn up during the day instead. Maybe she would have, but the IOA scientists had come up with a plan he didn't understand to get the crew of Destiny home, and the day had involved one meeting after another and he didn't get five minutes alone. Copley had even followed him into the bathroom on one occasion, but Jack was damned if he was holding a meeting in there. In the end it turned out the scientists' plans weren't going to work. They looked scared when Jack snapped at them for wasting his time, but he was tired and unrepentant.</p>
<p>By the time he reached home it was late and he desperately wanted to see Elizabeth, not just to apologise, but also because he'd liked her company. Neither the hockey nor the curling proved enough to distract him. He wandered over to the chess board and figured out his next half dozen moves, but that was useless without someone to play with.</p>
<p>It occurred to him that she could be there, but not visible. He looked around and, feeling self-conscious, said, "Elizabeth, I'm sorry. Please come back." Nothing happened. There wasn't even any sign to suggest she might be there. He sighed, went to bed alone again and had another sleepless night without her.</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>Jack yawned. He'd already had one cup of coffee this morning, but it wasn't helping. He'd need to get another one before he tackled the reports on his desk, otherwise he might end up sleeping on them. It was a big enough stack to use as a pillow and he wondered if anyone would notice. With his luck, he'd be discovered by Copley, which he was sure would just make the arguments worse. Jack knew he was going to have to do something about his tiredness before he made a mistake, but at the moment the only thing that had worked was Elizabeth's presence - and she was not someone he could conjure up at will, as he'd demonstrated.</p>
<p>When the phone rang he welcomed it as a distraction. Even if it was someone announcing the end of the world; it would keep him awake and get him out of today's National Security Briefing, which he struggled to stay alert in at the best of times. The idea that it might be the President calling him never crossed his mind until the person on the other end announced who it was. Jack stood to attention out of habit.</p>
<p>"General, you're taking a few days vacation. That's an order."</p>
<p>Even if it was the President, it didn't mean Jack was going to blindly follow orders he didn't like. "I am?"</p>
<p>"That or a heart attack. It's your choice." The President sounded entirely too cheerful about the rock and hard place choices he was offering.</p>
<p>Jack's heartbeat sped up as he worried about what the President might have been told. This might not be Jack's favorite job in the world, but he still wanted it. He wasn't ready to retire yet. "Mr. President, I swear I'm not going to have a heart attack."</p>
<p>The President laughed. "I've been speaking to a very insistent young lady who told me that was precisely what was going to happen unless you took a vacation."</p>
<p>Jack quickly did a mental inventory of everyone he knew who might go to the President and came up with two. Since one of them was on the Hammond, and he doubted she would go that far over his head for something so insignificant, that only left one. "You spoke to Elizabeth Weir?" Even if his tally meant it had to be her, he still couldn't believe she would go that far, especially since she couldn't have made an appointment to do it.</p>
<p>"Yes, I did. She was very concerned about you."</p>
<p>That was good. It probably meant she didn't hate him, but it did make him worried over how much she knew about his future. "There's nothing for her to be concerned about."</p>
<p>"I said that too, but I thought I ought to check her story. I spoke to some people who said said you've been looking tired lately."</p>
<p>Jack slumped. He had a feeling he wasn't going to win this one. It was hard to get away with ignoring the President.</p>
<p>"No one's indispensable, Jack," he said kindly. "A few days away with no one bothering you about work might be just the thing you need. And you know, if it isn't, you can come and complain to me personally. How about that?"</p>
<p>There was no way he could disagree with that. "Yes, Mr. President."</p>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>Although Jack was on vacation, it didn't stop him from worrying about what was going on at work in his absence. He had plenty of time to imagine scenarios while sitting by a lake for half a day with nothing but fish and beer to keep him company. Elizabeth hadn't put in an appearance, but he'd given up expecting her to.</p>
<p>A run, on the other hand, meant that all he could afford to think about was putting one foot in front of the other and keeping an eye on where he was going. By the time he returned to his cabin, he was too tired to think about anything except a hot shower. The desk job had allowed him to get more unfit than he would have liked. If nothing else, this vacation would remind him why he couldn't allow that to continue.</p>
<p>As he rounded the last corner and his cabin came into view he discovered a shower wasn't going to be his top priority after all because there was a Honda Civic parked outside that he didn't recognize. He slowed as he reached it, not sure he wanted the bad news. Once he could see no one was inside he peered into it. There was nothing on display to indicate who had driven it, so it was either a very tidy person or a hire car, which didn't narrow it down.</p>
<p>Although he'd locked the cabin door, anyone could get in around back. Jack followed that path, steeling himself for the worst. Just because the President had said no one was allowed to disturb him didn't mean they wouldn't if something terrible happened. He relaxed as he recognized the figure standing on the edge of the deck, looking out over the lake.</p>
<p>"Daniel," Jack called out, jogging up to him.</p>
<p>Daniel turned and smiled. "Hello, Jack. You were out so I thought I'd wait for you out here."</p>
<p>Jack waved a hand. He didn't mind, if it was Daniel. Even if something awful had happened, Daniel wouldn't be the person the Air Force would send. "I went for a run."</p>
<p>Daniel gave him a knowing look. "I can see that."</p>
<p>Jack glanced down at himself and noticed the sweat marks on his t-shirt. "I'll go shower. Make yourself at home." Daniel looked calm enough that he couldn't be here for anything urgent, but Jack didn't linger over his shower because he really wanted to know what Daniel was doing here.</p>
<p>By the time he returned he found Daniel had taken his suggestion literally and had covered his living room with papers and books. "Daniel," he said in a warning tone. "What are you doing?"</p>
<p>Daniel had heard that tone too often to be intimidated by it. "Tricky translation," he said, making a note in his notepad. "I've been working on it all week and I still can't work it out."</p>
<p>Jack raised his eyebrows. "And you're doing this here because...?"</p>
<p>Daniel hesitated before he put his pen down and looked up. "I had a visit from Elizabeth Weir last night." He made it sound like it was something Jack wouldn't want to hear.</p>
<p>"Seems like she's doing the rounds," Jack said casually, although it bugged him to find out she had recently visited both the President and Daniel, but not him. Especially as it sounded like he'd been the main topic of conversation with both of them.</p>
<p>Daniel had known him too long to take Jack's statement at face value and he frowned, before standing up and clearing the couch. "You knew she was ascended," he said, realization dawning as he set some of his papers carefully down on the floor, then sat on the now-clear couch.</p>
<p>Jack should have known he couldn't get anything past Daniel. "Yeah." He sat too, because hovering in the doorway was getting him nowhere and his legs still ached. "She wanted me to convince the IOA to let Atlantis go back to Pegasus."</p>
<p>"It should," Daniel said, apparently without considering the reasons why it shouldn't. Even Daniel had taken the opportunity to spend time in Atlantis while it was on Earth.</p>
<p>Jack sighed. "You try telling the IOA something they don't want to hear."</p>
<p>Daniel made a face and shook his head. "Anyway, she thought you might like some company and I thought a change of scenery might help with the translation."</p>
<p>"She did?" Jack asked suspiciously, although he wouldn't put it past her at this point. If she had the nerve to go to the President, speaking to Daniel would be easy in comparison.</p>
<p>"Yes." Daniel shifted in his seat and gave him a piercing look. "What's going on between the two of you?"</p>
<p>"Nothing," Jack replied quickly. He stood up and peered out at the weather. It was perfect for fishing, he decided.</p>
<p>"Really." Daniel's tone told Jack that he didn't believe that for a minute.</p>
<p>He turned back to face Daniel. "Oh, for crying out loud. She's ascended. She doesn't have a body."</p>
<p>Daniel put his hands up. "All right I was only asking."</p>
<p>Jack regretted his over-reaction and softened his tone, trying not to sound needy. "I haven't spoken to her for a couple days. You know better than I do what she's been up to."</p>
<p>Daniel raised his eyebrows. "If you say so."</p>
<p>If there was one thing Jack didn't want, it was to antagonize an old friend. "Let's have a beer and do some fishing. You can tell me about your translation and I'll pretend to listen."</p>
<p>Daniel smiled and stood up. "It'll be just like old times."</p>
<p>Jack smiled too. He did miss some of those old times.</p>
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		<title>[Stargate Atlantis] Feels Like Home (The Green Planet Remix)</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/05/08/stargate-atlantis-feels-like-home-the-green-planet-remix/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/05/08/stargate-atlantis-feels-like-home-the-green-planet-remix/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 08 May 2011 17:51:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Aiden Ford]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: John Sheppard]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Radek Zelenka]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Rodney McKay]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Vignette]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Gen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Written for: Remix]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/?p=525</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: PG Beta: Tanaqui and Selenay Spoilers: Enemy at the Gate Summary: Five places that didn't remind Rodney of home and one that did. Notes: Remix of Untitled SGA drabble by isabeau 1. Russia Rodney hunches over his laptop and pretends not to hear the conversation on the next table. Not that it matters because [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: PG<br />
Beta: Tanaqui and Selenay<br />
Spoilers: Enemy at the Gate<br />
Summary: Five places that didn't remind Rodney of home and one that did.<br />
Notes: Remix of <a href="http://isafic.livejournal.com/2115.html">Untitled SGA drabble</a> by isabeau<br />
<span id="more-525"></span><br />
1. Russia</p>
<p>Rodney hunches over his laptop and pretends not to hear the conversation on the next table. Not that it matters because it's all in Russian, but he's pretty sure they're talking about him. After two days he's learned the Russian for American and every conversation he's heard has included the word. No matter how many times he tells them, they don't seem to be able to understand that America and Canada are two different countries. That's the military for you - they don't recruit people for their brains. With the exception of Sam Carter.</p>
<p>Thinking about her makes him sigh and means he doesn't notice one of the marines approaching until he sits down opposite. Rodney hasn't bothered learning anyone's name; he doesn't plan on being here long enough to care. "Yes?" he says, shortly.</p>
<p>"I am scientist," the man says. "You tell me what I do and I help you."</p>
<p>Rodney opens his mouth to point out he doesn't need any help, but the idea of being able to order someone about is just too tempting to ignore. It's also possible, if unlikely, the marine isn't completely inept; if so, this might go quicker. The sooner he can get a few naquadah generators up and running, the sooner he can get out of here. So instead he says, "Get me some food."</p>
<p>The marine/scientist complies; a minute later he puts a plate of something on the table next to Rodney's laptop. Rodney looks at it suspiciously. "Is that food?"</p>
<p>"Is good." The marine starts digging into his own plate.</p>
<p>Rodney picks up something from the plate that he can't identify and bites into it. He quickly discovers that, although the mystery food looks soft, it's rock hard. "Ow!" He prods at his jaw gently. "I think I've broken a tooth."</p>
<p>"I take you to see doctor." The marine stands up, looking worried.</p>
<p>Rodney shakes his head vigorously. He's met the doctor on the base: he didn't speak a word of English and prodded Rodney until he hurt all over. He isn't going back there until they got a doctor who's sympathetic. "I'll go for a walk outside. It'll take my mind off it."</p>
<p>"Is snowing."</p>
<p>Rodney sighs again. He doesn't like the cold. He decides to go find the vodka instead. It's currently the only thing keeping him sane in this alien country.</p>
<p>2. Antarctica</p>
<p>Rodney's supposed to be working with the best scientific minds on Earth. He's seen their qualifications and knows they must all be brilliant. The only trouble is that none of them are showing it and all of them are acting like children. They constantly bicker and no one listens to a word he says. If only he had the Ancient gene: it would be so much simpler.</p>
<p>"I can't do it," Carson announces and stomps off.</p>
<p>Rodney knows how he feels. He's tried the chair twice and neither time could he make it do anything at all. At least Carson can get it to light up, which should count for something.</p>
<p>Around him, the other scientists speak to each other in a dozen different languages, but it's the ones speaking English who make the least sense. Talking to his cat gets better results, so Rodney's learned to ignore them all. It's not as it any of them know how to get Carson to get to the chair to do anything Carson can't, or won't, make it do.</p>
<p>Rodney's getting a headache, so he heads outside for some quiet. It takes ten minutes just to put on all the clothes that'll make sure he doesn't freeze to death, although he wonders if anyone would notice if he didn't bother. Outside, there's nothing but snow for as far as the eye can see. It reminds him of Russia in the winter. It's not comforting.</p>
<p>3. M3G-212</p>
<p>"Oh, look," Sheppard says, putting on those stupid sunglasses. He thinks they make him look cool. Rodney has given up telling him they don't. "It's an English village."</p>
<p>Rodney rolls his eyes and lets Sheppard explain to Teyla why the houses with the thatched roofs remind him of England. He doesn't think Sheppard has ever been to the place; he's probably only seen it in the movies.</p>
<p>"Why do all these planets look like Earth anyway?" Ford complains. "Everywhere we go the grass is green, the trees are green, the sky is blue. We could be on Earth for all we know."</p>
<p>Why is it that everywhere Rodney goes he's stuck with idiots? "The chlorophyll in the plants makes the leaves look green. The atmosphere scatters the blue end of the light spectrum, so that's what you see. If the atmosphere didn't have the same concentrations of elements we wouldn't be able to breathe. If the plants didn't have the chlorophyll they wouldn't be able to photosynthesize and there wouldn't be enough oxygen in the air to breathe."</p>
<p>"Thanks," Ford says. He sounds happy, even though Rodney made his explanation as short as he could and didn't slow down to take a breath. Maybe Ford likes the planet after all; maybe he's just bored with them all looking the same. Rodney doesn't really care.</p>
<p>The village green has park benches around it. Rodney sits on one of them and closes his eyes while Sheppard and Teyla make contact with the locals. He can almost imagine the sounds of distant traffic and yappy dogs being pulled along by their annoying owners. But those are things he's only seen in the movies and this is nothing like the Earth he remembers.</p>
<p>4. M4P-651</p>
<p>Rodney has his head bent over the life-signs detector as he ambles away from the Stargate. It's only when he hears Sheppard breathe "Wow" that he looks up. He blinks, wondering if his eyes have gone funny, but the look on Sheppard's face suggests he's seeing the same thing as Rodney</p>
<p>The grass is purple; the trees have multiple trunks and pink leaves; and the cloudless sky is white. It's the most alien landscape Rodney's ever seen. He half expects to be ambushed by little green men and carried off to be experimented on - except the life-signs detector tells him there's no one in the vicinity.</p>
<p>Ford once asked him why all planets looked the same. The answer had been so obvious that Rodney had been annoyed at having to spell it out. If Ford had been here now, Rodney's sure he would have asked why this planet was so different. Rodney doesn't know the answer yet and he hates to admit there's something beyond his understanding, but he still wishes Ford was here to ask the question.</p>
<p>"Makes a nice change," Sheppard says, breaking the moment.</p>
<p>Ronon and Teyla look at them, amused; they've seen it all before. As if by unspoken agreement, Sheppard and Rodney both try to act as nonchalant. But, as they start walking towards the nearest settlement, it's hard not to look at the unusual foliage.</p>
<p>5. Earth</p>
<p>They've been on Earth a week now and Rodney still isn't used to the view. Atlantis is floating in the Pacific Ocean and just outside the lab window is San Francisco. No one expects to be here very long but, while they are, they're taking the opportunity to get through all those little jobs they never seem to get around to when they're in imminent danger of attack from one race or another. Some people have gone home to visit their families and friends, but Rodney's been back on Earth recently enough and he's got more important things to do.</p>
<p>Except there's very little work going on. Too many of the people who've stayed in the city are spending too much of their time staring at the Golden Gate Bridge. In the end Rodney gives up trying to work and finds a balcony. Sheppard's already there, goodness knows why, but Rodney can't be bothered to go someplace else, so he leans on the railing beside him.</p>
<p>"It's not right," Sheppard says. "We shouldn't be here."</p>
<p>Rodney's been thinking the same thing all week. "I want to go home."</p>
<p>Sheppard nods. "We will. They can't keep us on Earth forever."</p>
<p>Rodney doesn't share Sheppard's optimism, but he hopes he's right. This isn't the planet he wants to live on any more.</p>
<p>1. Atlantis</p>
<p>When Rodney looks up into the sky, he can't pick out any of the constellations he's been used to seeing all his life. Even the Milky Way is no more than a bright smudge from here. The Ancients' database has names for all the stars visible from Atlantis, but he hasn't had enough time to learn many of them yet. The only one he can find without a computer is Sovegi, their pole star, at the end of the dragon's tail.</p>
<p>Zelenka's Czech swearing is still audible, even out on the balcony. But before Rodney goes back inside to fix whatever Zelenka has broken, he stays for a minute and listens to the lapping of the waves against one of the piers not far below him. The sound's supposed to be relaxing, according to an article he once read, long ago, before he learned not to read inaccurate pop science journals. Rodney's since decided the noise just makes him need to pee.</p>
<p>"Rodney." Zelenka's voice is loud enough that Rodney can tell, without turning round, that Zelenka's snuck out onto the balcony with him. "Are you coming back to work?"</p>
<p>"In a minute. Atlantis has been around for centuries. It'll wait a few minutes more." The whole city smells of history, the same way European castles do.</p>
<p>Zelenka comes up beside him and looks up at the sky. "It is a beautiful sight."</p>
<p>Rodney doesn't want to agree with him, because that will just encourage him. So all he says is, "It's home," before turning around and going back inside.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>[Stargate Atlantis] The Blue Devil</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/01/16/stargate-atlantis-the-blue-devil/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2011/01/16/stargate-atlantis-the-blue-devil/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 16 Jan 2011 11:46:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Elizabeth Weir]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Jack O'Neill]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Vignette]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Gen]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/?p=501</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: PG Spoilers: The Return Beta: Tanaqui Summary: Jack visits Elizabeth while she's on Earth. Elizabeth heard the knock at the door but wasn't at all sure she could be bothered to answer it. It was unlikely to be anyone from the SGC - they'd have called her, not come round to her apartment. Anyone [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: PG<br />
Spoilers: The Return<br />
Beta: Tanaqui<br />
Summary: Jack visits Elizabeth while she's on Earth.<br />
<span id="more-501"></span><br />
Elizabeth heard the knock at the door but wasn't at all sure she could be bothered to answer it. It was unlikely to be anyone from the SGC - they'd have called her, not come round to her apartment. Anyone else wasn't important enough to get off the couch for. She hadn't all day so far.</p>
<p>Except that whoever was out there knocked again. Since they apparently weren't going to go away - they could probably hear that she had the TV on - she sighed and got up. A peep through the spyhole told her it was Jack O'Neill. Who was both the last person she'd expected to see and the last person she wanted to see right now.</p>
<p>She ran her fingers through her hair, which hopefully made it look like she had bothered to brush it that morning. Then she opened the door.</p>
<p>"General O'Neill. What a surprise." She put on a smile and did her best to sound happy. It came out better than she hoped.</p>
<p>He grinned back. "Nice pajamas."</p>
<p>She blushed at being caught in them in the afternoon. But she was sure he hadn't come to comment on her choice of dress, or undress, so she took a step back and said, "Come in."</p>
<p>He took his cap off and looked around as he stepped over the threshold. Elizabeth wished he'd called ahead; she'd have tidied and made an effort on her appearance. Not to mention turned the TV off before answering the door.</p>
<p>"Judge Judy?" He raised his eyebrows as she lunged for the remote control and punched the off button more savagely than it deserved.</p>
<p>"It was just..." she began. She trailed off because she didn't have a good excuse, except that it was on and it had felt like too much effort to change the channel at the time. "I wasn't really watching it."</p>
<p>He nodded, seeming to take her explanation at face value. "Nice place."</p>
<p>"Thank you." She smiled at the compliment, although she knew he was lying. It was a nice enough apartment in itself, apart from being in the wrong galaxy, but it would look a heck of a lot better if she'd cleared away a few nights worth of take-out boxes. Too late for that now; he'd seen how much she didn't care already.</p>
<p>"Please sit." She sat on one end of the couch. He chose the other end. "So, is this just a social call or did you have something important to tell me?" She guessed the latter given the uniform, but you never could tell, especially with Jack.</p>
<p>"The Ancients called. They're finding Woolsey 'trying'." He mimed the quotes. "They want someone to mediate."</p>
<p>Finally! She smiled properly this time. She was going back to Atlantis, to talk to the Ancients. She'd be able to tell them all that had happened while they'd been away and learn from them. Except - her smile faltered - Jack didn't say any more than that and his expression was sympathetic. "It's not going to be me, is it?"</p>
<p>"Sorry." He sounded it too, but that didn't make her feel any better.</p>
<p>"Why not?" She leaned towards him. "You know there's no one more qualified."</p>
<p>"And if it was up to me...." He didn't bother to finish the sentence because they'd already had this conversation before they left Atlantis.</p>
<p>She sighed. "What do the IOA have against me?"</p>
<p>"Would you like the list?" His tone had the note of sarcasm that she'd heard from him often.</p>
<p>She shook her head. "I think I can guess." It wasn't even as if she'd annoyed them deliberately. There hadn't been anything she could have done differently to make sure they didn't punish her now by sending other people to Atlantis in her place. "So who <i>do</i> they want?"</p>
<p>"Me."</p>
<p>She nodded slowly. "I suppose... if it can't be me, I'm glad it's you."</p>
<p>"I wish it <i>was</i> you. Sitting around being talked at by Ancients isn't my idea of a good time."</p>
<p>She smiled at that. He was probably just saying it to make her feel better about him going, but she believed him anyway. He was a man of action. He'd likely be bored there and start making a fuss after a few days.</p>
<p>"I'll be checking in with the SGC regularly," he added. "If I have any questions I'll get them to call you."</p>
<p>"Thank you." He didn't have to do that; she was grateful there might be something for her to do after all.</p>
<p>He leaned back, looking more at home on her couch than she would have expected. "So, what have you been up to since you got back to Earth?"</p>
<p>"Oh, you know." She shrugged. "Just getting used to being on Earth again."</p>
<p>"Earth has better things that Judge Judy, you know."</p>
<p>She shook her head. "It doesn't have Ancients."</p>
<p>"Can't have everything," he conceded.</p>
<p>She heaved another sigh. Why couldn't the Ancients see that they could learn from each other? As much as she was glad Atlantis was still around and there were still people to protect the inhabitants of the Pegasus Galaxy from the Wraith, it was torture to be on Earth when there was somewhere better she could be.</p>
<p>"Elizabeth, what <i>are</i> you doing with your time?" Jack asked softly. "Other than watching daytime TV?"</p>
<p>"Oh, I watch it in the evenings too." She tried the smile again, but it didn't reach her eyes. "There's a lot to catch up on."</p>
<p>"But I bet you didn't miss it at all on Atlantis."</p>
<p>She shook her head "No. There was too much else to do." She often hadn't had enough time to sleep, never mind think about watching TV.</p>
<p>"So, anything I should know?" He leaned forward, watching her closely. "I mean, since I'm going to be living there it'd be nice to know the quirks."</p>
<p>She thought about it, but most of the things she could think of were only relevant when there were significant numbers of humans living there. And most of that was do with getting hold of decent coffee, how to get short explanations out of Rodney and how to get Ronon to file mission reports. She smiled - a proper one this time - remembering, but then her breath caught in her throat.</p>
<p>She swallowed and managed to hold back the tears. "You should go," she said. Somehow she kept her voice from breaking, mostly by not looking at Jack. "They'll be waiting for you."</p>
<p>He shifted into her line of vision, shaking his head. His expression was worried and that didn't help at all.</p>
<p>"Why would you want to spend time here on Earth when you can be on Atlantis? Some people would give their right arm to be in your position." It came out a little more forcefully than she'd intended.</p>
<p>"Even if it means spending time with Woolsey?" he joked.</p>
<p>She wasn't in the mood. "What do <i>you</i> know about Atlantis? What can you tell them about the Pegasus galaxy and what's happened since they've been away? You've barely set foot in the place."</p>
<p>"Elizabeth...." He reached a hand out towards her shoulder and she jerked back from it, standing up.</p>
<p>"That's my home, my life you're taking from me."</p>
<p>He stood to face her. "I'm sorry."</p>
<p>He looked so apologetic. She reminded herself that this was Jack O'Neill, here. He knew how much Atlantis meant to her; she knew he wouldn't do this on purpose.</p>
<p>She shook her head. "I'm sorry." But she couldn't say any more because a sob escaped her. She put a hand to her mouth.</p>
<p>A second later, Jack's arms were around her. She rested her head on his shoulder, allowing a few tears to escape.</p>
<p>"You know I'll do what I can," he murmured.</p>
<p>She nodded.</p>
<p>"You should do something," he said when he let her go. "Get dressed, stop watching TV and maybe write all this stuff down. One day someone might need your perspective on Atlantis."</p>
<p>That wasn't a bad idea, actually. He was right that she needed something to do. Doing nothing was making her more tired than the constant pressure of running Atlantis. "Perhaps I will." She hesitated a moment and then added, "Thank you."</p>
<p>"My pleasure." He picked up his hat, nodded at her and left.</p>
<p>Elizabeth turned back to her couch, hoping that Jack going to Atlantis was just the first step. Hoping that the next time she saw him they'd be asking for her too.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>[Stargate Atlantis] Leadership Debate</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2010/05/21/stargate-atlantis-leadership-debate/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2010/05/21/stargate-atlantis-leadership-debate/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 21 May 2010 19:04:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Elizabeth Weir]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Teyla Emmagen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Drabble]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Gen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Written for: Drabble a day]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/?p=386</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: G Summary: Elizabeth and Teyla commiserate over how hard it is to be leaders "It is not that I do not love my people, but sometimes..." Teyla ended her sentence with a sigh. Elizabeth smiled sympathetically. "I know what you mean. You do your best for them, but they don't always appreciate it." Teyla [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: G<br />
Summary: Elizabeth and Teyla commiserate over how hard it is to be leaders<br />
<span id="more-386"></span><br />
"It is not that I do not love my people, but sometimes..." Teyla ended her sentence with a sigh.</p>
<p>Elizabeth smiled sympathetically. "I know what you mean. You do your best for them, but they don't always appreciate it."</p>
<p>Teyla nodded. "Your people do not have a great history of female leaders. Is it harder because you are a woman?"</p>
<p>Elizabeth considered it. "It shouldn't." This was the 21st century. "But I'm not sure."</p>
<p>"I believe many of those in Atlantis do not care," Teyla assured her.</p>
<p>"Thank you, Teyla." Even this short chat had made Elizabeth feel better already.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>[Stargate Atlantis] What&#8217;s Not Lost</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2010/05/13/stargate-atlantis-whats-not-lost/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2010/05/13/stargate-atlantis-whats-not-lost/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 May 2010 06:34:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Elizabeth Weir]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Jack O'Neill]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Drabble]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pairing: Jack/Elizabeth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Het]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Written for: Drabble a day]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/?p=368</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: PG-13 Spoilers: The Return Summary: Jack can't give Elizabeth what she wants. As Jack brushes Elizabeth's hair away from her neck, his fingers graze her shoulder and she shivers. When she turns to face him she finds his expression isn't sympathetic any more and she reaches out to trace his lips with her thumb. [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: PG-13<br />
Spoilers: The Return<br />
Summary: Jack can't give Elizabeth what she wants.<br />
<span id="more-368"></span><br />
As Jack brushes Elizabeth's hair away from her neck, his fingers graze her shoulder and she shivers. When she turns to face him she finds his expression isn't sympathetic any more and she reaches out to trace his lips with her thumb. Once she reaches his cheek he presses a kiss to her palm. "Jack," she begins. She wants to ask him to take her back to her city, but she knows he can't do that, so doesn't finish. He says nothing, just takes her over to the bed and helps her forget what she's lost for a little while.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>[Stargate Atlantis] No Return</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2010/05/09/stargate-atlantis-no-return/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2010/05/09/stargate-atlantis-no-return/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 09 May 2010 15:33:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Elizabeth Weir]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Jack O'Neill]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Drabble]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Gen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Written for: Drabble a day]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/?p=359</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: G Spoilers: The Return Summary: Elizabeth has to get used to a new place. Elizabeth stared out the window at the cars rushing past in the rain, unmindful of her surroundings until Jack spoke. "A bit different from Atlantis." She nodded but didn't face him, so he wouldn't be able to see the tears [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: G<br />
Spoilers: The Return<br />
Summary: Elizabeth has to get used to a new place.<br />
<span id="more-359"></span><br />
Elizabeth stared out the window at the cars rushing past in the rain, unmindful of her surroundings until Jack spoke.</p>
<p>"A bit different from Atlantis."</p>
<p>She nodded but didn't face him, so he wouldn't be able to see the tears in her eyes. She had to be strong and save the crying for when she was alone.</p>
<p>"Elizabeth," Jack said softly, and put a hand on her shoulder.</p>
<p>She looked up at his worried expression.</p>
<p>Jack put his arms around her. "I'll find a way to get Atlantis back," he promised.</p>
<p>All Elizabeth could do was cry on his shoulder.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>[Doctor Who/Stargate Atlantis] Park Life</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2010/03/31/doctor-whostargate-atlantis-park-life/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2010/03/31/doctor-whostargate-atlantis-park-life/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 31 Mar 2010 19:18:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Doctor Who]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Harry Sullivan]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Jeannie Miller]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Vignette]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Gen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Written for: A Ficathon Walks Into A Bar]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/?p=335</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: PG Beta: Selenay Spoilers: McKay and Mrs Miller Summary: Harry Sullivan walks into a bar park and meets... Jeannie Miller Jeannie smiled as she returned Madison's wave and watched her daughter turn away to play on the climbing frame. Even though everyone on the Daedalus and in Atlantis had been friendly and welcoming, she'd [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: PG<br />
Beta: Selenay<br />
Spoilers: McKay and Mrs Miller<br />
Summary: Harry Sullivan walks into a <s>bar</s> park and meets... Jeannie Miller<br />
<span id="more-335"></span><br />
Jeannie smiled as she returned Madison's wave and watched her daughter turn away to play on the climbing frame. Even though everyone on the Daedalus and in Atlantis had been friendly and welcoming, she'd still missed home, and Kaleb and Madison in particular. She was glad to see Madison hadn't suffered from her absence, beyond being a little clingy. It made her feel guilty for having left in the first place, but also glad that she was a little more indispensable as a mother than Mer thought she was.</p>
<p>However, it was strange coming back to this normal life that didn't involve aliens or life in other galaxies or a war with aliens that wanted to wipe out all life on Earth. She was glad she had gone - goodness knows what Mer might have done on his own - but she wasn't quite sure how her life would be the same again. She couldn't decide how much to let it either - she was facing the same choices as she had when she'd been pregnant with Madison and thinking of giving up her career.</p>
<p>"Excuse me."</p>
<p>She jumped at the voice coming from beside her on the bench. She'd been so wrapped up in her thoughts that she hadn't noticed anyone sitting down. When she turned to her left she found that he was an older man with graying hair, who was dressed far too warmly for a sunny day.</p>
<p>"Sorry, I didn't mean to make you jump."</p>
<p>She smiled at his apology and noted the British accent. "It's all right. I was miles away." More miles, in fact, that he might ever have guessed.</p>
<p>"I thought I'd go for a walk and now I've got myself completely lost. I'm looking for the harbour."</p>
<p>She raised her eyebrows. "You are lost."</p>
<p>He sighed. "It's going to be a long walk back, isn't it?"</p>
<p>"I'm afraid so."</p>
<p>"I could ring someone to come and get me, I suppose, but I never quite got the hang of this." He pulled a cellphone from his jacket pocket and frowned at it.</p>
<p>Jeannie couldn't help but smile. They were simple to use, but she could understand that older folks might not think so. "I can call someone for you, if you like. Do you know the number?"</p>
<p>"It's in here, under UNIT."</p>
<p>He passed the cell over and Jeannie scrolled through the menu. Most of the entries in there made no sense, although a few were ordinary names. It was snooping, but this was a man she'd only just met and it could be a trick. He looked honest enough, but you never could tell. Just in case, she made sure to keep one eye on him as she found the entry marked 'UNIT', dialled the number and handed the cell back.</p>
<p>He smiled as he took it, then stood up and stepped away to make the call. She strained to hear, and was glad that the words she could make out sounded like they matched with the story he'd told her. While he spoke Madison moved over to the slide and Jeannie made sure to applaud her as she reached the bottom. Madison gave her a big grin and went back for another go. The man stepped a little closer to Jeannie and confirmed that whoever he was talking to could work out his position from his cellphone, which made it sound like they were the CSIS or something.</p>
<p>When he finished he frowned at the cell and sat back down. Jeannie tensed, keeping an eye on Madison and made sure she was ready to run over to her if necessary. If this man was involved with the same sort of people Mer was, who knew what could be going on.</p>
<p>But he said, "Do you know how I put the phone down?" and Jeannie smiled in relief. She happily pressed the button for him, and then he put the cell back in his pocket.</p>
<p>"Thank you. I swear I should be used to it by now. Harry Sullivan," he added, and held out his hand. "It won't be long before I get an escort back."</p>
<p>She shook his hand. "Jeannie Miller." At least she had a name now, and maybe she could find out more, since neither of them were going anywhere for a few minutes, at least. "What brings you to Vancouver?"</p>
<p>"Work." He paused and frowned. "I'm in the Navy," he added, as if that explained everything.</p>
<p>What the British Navy were doing this side of Canada, she didn't know. She hadn't seen anything about it in the news and she had been studying it carefully since she got back, just in case she saw anything strange that might suggest the Wraith were on their way here. "So how do you like Vancouver?"</p>
<p>"Wet. It reminds me of home." He smiled, although she thought that maybe he sounded a little homesick. She would be if she were in his position.</p>
<p>"It's good to be home," she said. She smiled at Madison who applauded herself as she successfully slid down the slide. She was glad that Mer was beginning to see that she had made the right decision four years ago. And now that they were talking again, maybe she didn't have to decide between her family and physics this time. After all, there was email, even between here and the Pegasus galaxy.</p>
<p>"Sometimes the people who love you are just as important as saving the world," she added. He raised his eyebrows at that and she couldn't blame him. World saving was not exactly a common job. "My brother saves the world," she explained, a note of pride creeping into her voice.</p>
<p>A shadow passed over his face. "I'm glad to hear there are people doing that."</p>
<p>"Commodore Sullivan."</p>
<p>This time they were both startled by the man who had approached the bench. A British sailor, Jeannie assumed, although she wasn't sure if they usually wore red berets.</p>
<p>"Tell him to keep up the good work," Harry said as he stood up.</p>
<p>"I will," Jeannie replied, nodding, and went to push Madison on the swings.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>[Stargate Atlantis] On Ice</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2010/02/21/stargate-atlantis-on-ice/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2010/02/21/stargate-atlantis-on-ice/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 21 Feb 2010 17:38:44 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Elizabeth Weir]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Rodney McKay]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Double drabble]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Gen]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/?p=331</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: G Summary: Elizabeth reveals she shares a sporting interest with Rodney. Elizabeth frowned as she rounded a corner and heard cheering. She was nowhere near the gym and it wasn't poker night, so she wondered what was going on. Whatever it was, it was bound to be more interesting than the stack of reports [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: G<br />
Summary: Elizabeth reveals she shares a sporting interest with Rodney.<br />
<span id="more-331"></span><br />
Elizabeth frowned as she rounded a corner and heard cheering. She was nowhere near the gym and it wasn't poker night, so she wondered what was going on. Whatever it was, it was bound to be more interesting than the stack of reports she had to get through.</p>
<p>Sneaking up to investigate wasn't hard - there was enough noise that no one heard her come up behind the group of people clustered around something. A few well-placed elbows and she found it was a laptop, which explained the slightly tinny sound coming from it.</p>
<p>"Oh, good shot," she said, at what she saw.</p>
<p>All of a sudden she found she was faced by a variety of guilty looking people.</p>
<p>"What's the score?" She made no move to reprimand anyone for not working.</p>
<p>"Uh, you watch curling?" Rodney asked.</p>
<p>She smiled in return. "Well, it's a little like chess." She didn't admit that it was Jack O'Neill who had explained all the rules and then forced her to watch some. She'd ended up liking it, only partly against her will.</p>
<p>At her admission, Rodney gave her a blow-by-blow account of what she'd missed and everyone settled in to watch the game.</p>
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		<title>[Stargate/Atlantis] Five Relationships Jack O&#8217;Neill and John Sheppard Could Have Had</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2008/07/31/stargateatlantis-five-relationships-jack-oneill-and-john-sheppard-could-have-had/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2008/07/31/stargateatlantis-five-relationships-jack-oneill-and-john-sheppard-could-have-had/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 31 Jul 2008 21:59:12 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Daniel Jackson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Elizabeth Weir]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Jack O'Neill]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: John Sheppard]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Rodney McKay]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Sam Carter]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Teyla Emmagen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Vignette]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pairing: Jack/Daniel]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pairing: John/Elizabeth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pairing: John/Rodney]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pairing: John/Teyla]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pairing: Sam/Jack]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Het]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Slash]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/?p=219</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: PG Pairings: Sheppard/Teyla, Jack/Daniel, Sheppard/Weird, Sam/Jack, Sheppard/McKay Summary: Between them, Jack O'Neill and John Sheppard were in love with five people. But if they'd just done something different... 1. Sheppard/Teyla When John first starting sparring with Teyla he told himself envy had nothing to do with it. He was wrong but then that was [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: PG<br />
Pairings: Sheppard/Teyla, Jack/Daniel, Sheppard/Weird, Sam/Jack, Sheppard/McKay<br />
Summary: Between them, Jack O'Neill and John Sheppard were in love with five people. But if they'd just done something different...<br />
<span id="more-219"></span><br />
<strong>1. Sheppard/Teyla</strong></p>
<p>When John first starting sparring with Teyla he told himself envy had nothing to do with it. He was wrong but then that was never the only reason. He thought it would be an excellent opportunity to watch her - she was good to look at after all. He soon found out that he did indeed need to watch her carefully - just not in the way he first thought.</p>
<p>At the moment he was trying to give all of his attention to her right arm, since it was holding the stick that was coming towards his head. To bring her arm up there from her previous position she'd had to spin round and in doing so her skirt whirled around her legs, exposing her thigh. John had tried really hard not to look down but he had spent too much time with the idea that movement in your peripheral vision could be important. He wondered if she did it on purpose, if she knew the reason he did not improve much was not lack of practice. It was hard to concentrate on two sticks when there was the whole of Teyla there too.</p>
<p>It did not help that Atlantis itself was full of distractions. It was easy to catch your eye on the orange glow around the window or the muted blue of the lights that never seemed to be too dim or too bright. He had wondered what the Ancients could possibly have used the patterns on the floor for. As there was no way of really knowing what they had even used each room for it had only ever been a passing thought.</p>
<p>He wrenched his mind back to the job and quickly brought his left arm up, meeting her stick with slightly more force than was strictly required. It threw her arm back and he was rewarded by a sharp pain to the ribs: he had been paying too much attention to the stick in one hand and not enough to the other. She did not admonish him for his lapse - the pain did that.</p>
<p>"Ow," he said. He saw Teyla's frown and decided to ask for a break and some time to collect his thoughts.</p>
<p>It was not all that painful really - Teyla never hit that hard - but it was probably still enough to leave a bruise. When he showered he often took the opportunity to take stock. He wondered if anyone who saw him naked would think he was regularly being beaten up - even though in some respects that was true. Perhaps if that someone was Teyla she would go easier on him. The chance, however, seemed slight. She would be far more likely to remind him to practice, so that he would end up with fewer bruises and she with more, or indeed any.</p>
<p>He had definitely had a crush on her the first time they met. He thought she probably felt the same way about him, which was lucky because Colonel Sumner had not exactly endeared himself to the Athosians. Once they had got acquainted they discovered they liked more than just looks and had become friends. John coveted that friendship very much. The trouble was that the crush had never quite gone away, at least not for him.</p>
<p>"Is there something on your mind, Major?" Teyla asked, as she took a seat in the window, laying her sticks carefully in her lap. She sounded so sympathetic that John felt guilty there was not. Not really, anyway.</p>
<p>He sat down next to her, making sure to look at her face and not the way her skirt lay. Not that it was any less off-putting, he was just more used to the sight. "No," he said, yet there was hardly a time Teyla was not in his thoughts.</p>
<p>"Major."</p>
<p>Now he felt like a little boy caught out in a lie. "It's just a little frustrating that you beat me every time we spar." Which was the truth, if not all of it.</p>
<p>"If you practice, one day that will change." She patted him on the arm.</p>
<p>He could not help smiling at her confidence in him although he suspected that day was a long way off yet. He could feel exactly where every one of her fingers lay and had to fight the urge to grab her hand and hold it where it was. Unfortunately, Teyla was a suspicious person.</p>
<p>"There is something bothering you."</p>
<p>He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and decided to do something insanely stupid. "I can't concentrate with you looking like that."</p>
<p>He opened his eyes again to see her looking down and frowning. "I am not wearing anything special."</p>
<p>"No, and that's the problem."</p>
<p>All he got in return was a quizzical look. He saw it on her often, usually in response to some reference he had made to Earth. Part of the reason he said some of the things he did was to get that look.</p>
<p>"It's that skirt and that top. It's like...your worst enemy's Ferrari."</p>
<p>The expression did not really change.</p>
<p>"Look, you're beautiful, okay? I mean, how can anyone not...?" He did not quite want to finish that sentence. He tightened his fingers on his sticks before they fell to the floor. "But I know you don't feel the same way, so just pretend I never said anything and I'll leave before I embarrass myself any further or risk our friendship any more than I already have." He got up and walked out of the open door, half hoping she would call him back.</p>
<p>She never did.</p>
<p><strong>2. Jack/Daniel</strong></p>
<p>There was something about talking to Daniel that made Jack smile. He was so different from the rest of Jack's friends. Which was not really surprising given they were Air Force through and through. He did not want to use the cliché 'breath of fresh air', but sometimes he felt Daniel was almost better, and more essential, than oxygen. Which made Jack think about feelings he had not had for a long time.</p>
<p>At the moment, though, he was not doing the talking, as Daniel was briefing SG-1 in his office, although it was more like a lesson, really. Daniel stood next to a computer that occasionally showed them pretty pictures and Jack, Carter and Teal'c sat around the table, taking in everything he said. Carter at least looked as if she was concentrating, like the school swot she probably had been. Teal'c just looked his ordinary inscrutable self, which made it somewhat hard to tell. Jack had once asked him how he did it. Teal'c merely raised an eyebrow in answer and never changed his expression. Jack did not know why he had been surprised at this.</p>
<p>Jack idly picked up what looked like an ordinary piece of stone and out of the corner of his eye saw Daniel glance over. He suppressed a smirk (Air Force Colonels did not 'smirk'), looked directly at Daniel once again and waited for him to complain. Daniel surprised him by carrying straight on with whatever he was saying about a Goa'uld called 'Tough Nut'. She was only a minor Goa'uld and did not seem to pose any immediate threat so Jack was not too worried about her. Daniel certainly seemed more excited than worried, so Jack took his cue from him.</p>
<p>The trouble was Jack was not very good at listening to Daniel. At least, he was not very good at hearing the words. He probably would have been content to listen to Daniel read the Book of the Dead if he had the chance. It did not really matter what he said, the voice alone was enough to make him tingly (not that he would admit that to anyone, Air Force Colonels did not get 'tingly'). This was a problem during the times he needed to know what Daniel was saying and it was hard to concentrate. At least if Daniel kept it short he would be more likely to actually hear what he was telling him. Protesting not only got a short speech but Daniel's full attention and that was something he both coveted and reproached himself for.</p>
<p>"...Tefnut was close to Ra..."</p>
<p>Jack suddenly sat up and dropped the stone when he heard a name he recognized. It clanged on the table and all eyes were on him. He put a hand over it to quieten the noise.</p>
<p>"Ra. We killed him. He is dead, right?" he said, mostly to cover himself but also because he was afraid Daniel was about to tell them this Tefnut had resurrected Ra or something. You just never know what these crazy snakes were going to get up to next.</p>
<p>"Yes, Jack."</p>
<p>Daniel was talking to him like he was a child but it didn't matter. Jack was more worried he had accidentally set something off, so he let go of the stone and put his hands up. When nothing happened he frowned and picked it back up.</p>
<p>"It's just a stone."</p>
<p>Daniel met his eyes and there was a small smile on his face. Jack tried hard to look as innocent as possible and not return the expression, without much success. That was the trouble with having briefings in Daniel's office, there were too many things in it that Jack just could not help himself. He didn't do it consciously, at least, not always, but he couldn't concentrate without having something for his hands to do. After a while it seemed Daniel started getting wise to him and put the important, breakable stuff on a shelf too high for Jack to idly pick up.</p>
<p>At least in the briefing room the only thing he could play with was his pen but he'd had to stop doodling when he realised Daniel's name was far too obvious. But that meant he had nothing to do with his hands, so instead regularly lost pens under the table or behind his chair somewhere. Which was not a place possible to casually pick anything up from in the middle of one of Daniel's speeches. Besides, pinching Daniel's pen was much more fun, not only to see the expression on his face.</p>
<p>He constantly had to remind himself it was all just friendship on Daniel's part. He longed to tell him how he felt but was too scared of his reaction. Besides, men just did not talk about their feelings, especially Air Force Colonels. Jack told himself he never had and was not going to start now, not caring that Daniel had got a fair few feelings out of him already.</p>
<p>He watched the way Daniel smiled at him, listened to his voice, coveted every touch and even bought the same soap so washing seemed more like smelling Daniel. The only sense was left was taste and he didn't think there was a big enough alien influence excuse to get out of that one. Sometimes he thought it would be worth it. Mostly, though, he thought he should save that for his death day, just in case.</p>
<p>He would far rather have Daniel as a friend than nothing at all. He already had most of Daniel and what he did not was in his fantasies. Anyway, not much would change if they were lovers.</p>
<p>Would it?</p>
<p><strong>3. Sheppard/Weir</strong></p>
<p>John took a deep breath of warm Earth air and tried to make out patterns in the stars. In the year they had been in Atlantis he had got used to spotting different shapes and these somehow seemed strange now. Much more so was the feeling of homesickness he felt. Coming here felt more like a vacation than home, a break from looking for ZPMs and killing Wraith.</p>
<p>He had given up on the constellations he had never known very well anyway and found one that he thought looked like a Puddlejumper when he heard footsteps. He thought about leaving but unlike Atlantis, places such as this where you could breathe fresh air and look at the sky were hard to come by. At least, they were when you were living under a mountain, however temporary that arrangement was. He could share.</p>
<p>He had found this spot nearly by accident. He had gone running round the parking lot, which had been enough of a novelty that he ignored the looks the guards gave him. After a few circuits he had started looking for better scenery and found a path in one corner leading to a relatively secluded spot with more interesting views than gray corridors or cars that had not really changed much in a year.</p>
<p>He went to call out but only got as far as opening his mouth when he heard a sob. He was torn between leaving and probably being heard or asking what was wrong when the figure came close enough that he could work out who it was in the dim light.</p>
<p>"Elizabeth?" He knew he should not be quite so taken aback as he was. Elizabeth had the best poker face on Atlantis, which he had discovered while losing large amounts of chocolate to her, but even she must get upset from time to time.</p>
<p>There was a pause before a slightly shaky, "John?" in response.</p>
<p>His first thought was that something had gone horribly wrong with their return plans to Atlantis but he immediately dismissed it. If that was the case Elizabeth would be doing everything she could to fix it and not be outside the SGC crying. So it must be something else. But even though they were friends she played things very close to her chest and he knew almost nothing about her personal life.</p>
<p>He wished things were otherwise, that he could be someone she could tell things to, but he had not really told her much about himself either. Sure, she could look in his file (and she certainly had) and he could do the same. It did not tell him much about her, though, beyond what amazing things she had done and when her birthday was, a date he had made certain not to forget.</p>
<p>After a few months their relationship had moved on from a working one to friendship. He suspected that Elizabeth kept her distance with all the personnel on Atlantis because of her status of the head of the mission. That didn't mean she had to be lonely, though. John had reached out to her a few times and she had made small gestures towards returning them. He wanted more but had no intention of rushing her.</p>
<p>He moved closer to Elizabeth, so she would be able to see it was really him. He could only see by the distant lights from Cheyenne Mountain, but since he could no longer hear her he was fairly sure his presence had stopped her tears for the moment.</p>
<p>"What's wrong?" he asked, not expecting an answer straight away. He was right.</p>
<p>"Nothing." Her voice sounded much more like normal, which confirmed his guess.</p>
<p>"You can't fool me, Elizabeth, we know each other too well," he cringed as he said it. "I heard you crying," he added.</p>
<p>There was silence as she turned away from him. He looked at the back of her head - or where it would have been, her hair being hard to see with only a little light. He thought he knew how to deal with upset women but none of them had ever been Elizabeth Weir.</p>
<p>"We survived an attack by the Wraith," he said, trying for a bit of humour, "nothing else can possibly be as bad as that."</p>
<p>He was not really expecting a laugh but he also was not anticipating the sigh he heard.</p>
<p>"I'll leave you alone, if that's what you want." He could not resist putting one hand on her shoulder for a moment before turning away.</p>
<p>"John," this time it was clearer and he stopped, looking at the black shape that was Elizabeth in the dark.</p>
<p>"My..." she began, "the man I thought I would marry has...met someone else."</p>
<p>"He was an idiot," he said, meaning it.</p>
<p>"No, it was my fault. I can't blame him for not waiting."</p>
<p>"If he loved you enough, if he thought you were worth it, he would have."</p>
<p>She shook her head. Her eyes lit up briefly as the tears in them caught the light. He really wanted to tell her he would have waited, but didn't because she didn't need to know his feelings for her, not now, not yet. Not knowing what else to say, he put his hand back on her shoulder. It seemed to help because he felt her relax slightly under his hand. He resisted the temptation to move it, so they stayed like that for a few minutes until Elizabeth dried her eyes and they went back inside.</p>
<p>John made a vow to himself to make sure she never had the chance to think about what she had lost, as long as he was around.</p>
<p><strong>4. Sam/Jack</strong></p>
<p>Jack stood in the control room, hovering over Walter Harriman and trying to resist the temptation to take up biting his fingernails. It would not make the wait go any quicker. He was not by nature a very patient person and just standing here waiting for news didn't help, nor did the fact that the most likely news would be both good and bad. Good because Carter would have saved the world again and bad because the result would be her almost certain death. One that he had sent her to.</p>
<p>He trusted Carter to save their asses every time. Partly because she always managed to do it, even if it was sometimes at the last minute, but also because when she gave him that look he had no choice but to believe she could do the impossible. When he first met her he wondered if there was anything she didn't do well. He was still thinking about it but now he could just be biased. He couldn't deny it: Carter was brilliant and the SGC, the Air Force, hell the world, was lucky to have her. It made him distinctly jealous - he wanted her too.</p>
<p>"Five minutes," Walter reminded them, as if the countdown clock someone had decided was a good idea wasn't enough.</p>
<p>Jack watched the time tick down from 5:00 to 4:50, each second seeming to take an hour, before he heard Carter's voice.</p>
<p>"Nearly there."</p>
<p>In those two words Jack could hear a hint of desperation and maybe even panic, but Carter was too good a soldier to let it get to her. It was almost unfair. She was too busy to think of her impending death and he could think of nothing else.</p>
<p>He resisted the temptation to say anything to her because she needed to concentrate and the only thing he wanted to say right now was both unhelpful and not something he wanted the whole SGC to overhear. He tried not to regret that he had never said it because he had not had to.</p>
<p>"Carter, you're the best we have. You're the only one who can do this."</p>
<p>"I know, sir."</p>
<p>He nodded. Of course she did, but there was a difference between trying not to die killing the enemy and going in knowing your likelihood of survival was small.</p>
<p>"Carter..." but he just could not say it. To say the words made it real and, in this case, reality was a bad thing.</p>
<p>"I know," she repeated, but softer this time, and with a long look into his eyes.</p>
<p>Then she left and he was looking at the Stargate waiting for her to be gone forever. It sat there, as big and round and silent as usual. Just once, it would have been nice for something so important to all of them to have some answers. He knew an inanimate object was never going to be any help at all in this situation but meeting the eyes of anyone else in the room just made the tension worse. Daniel had already decided it was too much and disappeared, back to his office Jack assumed.</p>
<p>He had returned only a few minutes later, though. There had been just enough time for him to have got down to his office, wandered about a bit, and then come back up, Jack calculated. The countdown might have been unbearable but it was not as bad as pacing a room waiting - something Jack had had much experience of since his promotion. Sitting in his office while a team was off world and in a potentially perilous situation was much harder than going out there and being in danger himself. He told himself he felt the same whatever team it was but obviously he was closer to SG-1 than any of the others.</p>
<p>He had always reasoned that Carter was a busy person who did not have time for a relationship but the truth was the only reason he had never done anything about what he was fairly sure was their mutual attraction, was the regs. Jack O'Neill was not usually a man prone to obeying orders he disagreed with, and he disagreed with this one just at the moment, although before he had heard of the Stargate it had seemed much more reasonable.</p>
<p>Carter, on the other hand, was a good little soldier who did what she was told. She would never approach him and if he made any advances towards her it would leave her in a quandary, one which he did not want to put her in. He told himself it was not because he did not want her to choose the Air Force over him but in truth he did not know which was worse.</p>
<p>"Two minutes," Walter broke his thoughts.</p>
<p>"Come on, Carter," Jack said, almost under his breath.</p>
<p>Jack could feel Daniel and Teal'c looming over each shoulder. He took a few deep breaths to try and calm his racing heart, and put his hands in his pockets so no-one could see them shake. He almost prayed to a god he didn't believe in, the Goa'uld having made him take a long rethink about religion. He wanted to ask if, by some miracle, on top of the one he had asked her to perform, Carter came back alive he would not take her for granted again but that was not really what he wanted to ask for. What he really wanted was a promise he couldn't keep.</p>
<p>He settled for the safe return of a friend instead.</p>
<p><strong>5. Sheppard/McKay</strong></p>
<p>John had always thought that the revelation that he was gay would come as more of a surprise. If he had expected it at all, that is. He thought this sort of problem was one only teenagers had. Perhaps he was going through some sort of early mid-life crisis caused by living in a galaxy far away.</p>
<p>He blamed his dilemma entirely on Rodney McKay, who, along with clearly being too sexy for his own good, was generally the cause of most problems. In all fairness, he was often also the solution to them, although even this one might be beyond even Rodney.</p>
<p>It had all begun that morning when the two of them had gone out for some flying practice. He had started the whole thing partly to soothe some of Carson's fears, but also because if there were fewer military people available to fly the jumpers than they needed in a fight, then he wanted the next best thing. He was sure people like Carson and Rodney would be able to get the hang of it eventually, they just needed enough practice to make it second nature.</p>
<p>Today Rodney had seemed more confident than usual and John had suggested he try some moves. It turned out Rodney had seen too many movies but he attempted some rolls anyway. It had taken a few tries but he did eventually manage to finish with the jumper the right way up and heading in the right direction.</p>
<p>"Woo hoo!" Unable to contain his excitement Rodney had felt the need to jump up and high five his instructor.</p>
<p>"Hands on the controls," John admonished but could not keep the smile off his face.</p>
<p>Suitably serious once more, at least in thought, if not in bearing, Rodney sat down and did a victory roll. John saw the world turn out of the corner of his eye and thought how strange it was that Rodney made the planet move for him. He had been staring at Rodney, though, and Rodney was too engrossed to call him on it.</p>
<p>In that moment John had fallen in love. Or at least in lust, he was not certain which just yet. He couldn't help looking at Rodney's hands and thinking about how much of him they would be able to touch. He really wanted to see that smile again but aimed at him. Perhaps it was all just because he hadn't got laid in a while and could see no chance of getting any in the near future. At least not without Rodney bitching at him about it.</p>
<p>According to John's plan, Rodney's success should mean he was ready to go out on his own. He told himself Rodney would just get cocky, try harder tricks, crash the jumper and get himself killed, but really it was just a good excuse to spend more time with a man who was usually only this happy over Ancient technology.</p>
<p>Afterwards they had gone their separate ways and John assumed the feeling was temporary brought on by the excitement of it all, or something. A belief he happily indulged in until he went for dinner in the mess and listened to Rodney brag about his flying. John had felt quite proud that he was the one to teach him, and Rodney in return was happy to give credit to anyone who would listen (a number which, unsurprisingly, fell rapidly after a few repetitions). The feelings he had felt back in the jumper had not gone away.</p>
<p>He ended up spending most of the day staring at pretty much anyone he could, which had involved some slightly odd looks back. Okay, very odd in some cases. But he had to figure this thing out and a comparison to Rodney seemed like the obvious answer.</p>
<p>The trouble was, none of them compared. Some were better looking, some even Rodney would be forced to admit were almost as intelligent but none of them had everything that Rodney did. Rodney was someone he could stay up all night talking to having debates about important things such as exactly how the Ancients built the great city of Atlantis, and unimportant things like the best flavor of ice cream.</p>
<p>Rodney was never going to have a second career as a male model (which given his temperament was probably just as well) but then who wants a pretty boy anyway? He had taken to the non-scientific side of Atlantis life as well and, in addition to his new piloting skills, was becoming a pretty good shot. They had so much in common how could they not be perfect for each other?</p>
<p>If Rodney were a woman this thing, whatever it was, would not be so much of a problem. His mind carelessly conjured up an image of Rodney with long hair, stamping his foot when he disagreed with someone. He couldn't help laughing, briefly imagining trying to keep a straight face next time they talked. It was probably going to be impossible but did have the added bonus of driving Rodney crazy trying to work it out. He had said once before how much he worried about what went on in John's head. <em>If only you could see</em>, he thought.</p>
<p>He recalled the morning once more and filled his mind with an image of a smiling Rodney, remembered his voice, and wrapped himself in it until it was all he could see and hear. Satisfied, he fell asleep almost immediately.</p>
<p>And dreamt of Rodney McKay.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>[Stargate Atlantis] Shower</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2008/05/05/stargate-atlantis-shower/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2008/05/05/stargate-atlantis-shower/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 05 May 2008 19:45:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Elizabeth Weir]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Jack O'Neill]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Double drabble]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pairing: Jack/Elizabeth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Het]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/?p=210</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: PG Spoilers: The Return part 2 Summary: Jack/Elizabeth Elizabeth was unpacking when the chimes at her door sounded. She was surprised and pleased when she opened it to find Jack on the other side. "I thought you'd gone." Even though she'd wanted to do more, she'd hugged him goodbye, which was all she'd felt [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: PG<br />
Spoilers: The Return part 2<br />
Summary: Jack/Elizabeth<br />
<span id="more-210"></span><br />
Elizabeth was unpacking when the chimes at her door sounded. She was surprised and pleased when she opened it to find Jack on the other side.</p>
<p>"I thought you'd gone." Even though she'd wanted to do more, she'd hugged him goodbye, which was all she'd felt comfortable doing in the open. Gossip travelled fast in Atlantis and she had no wish to be a part of it.</p>
<p>He shook his head. "I thought I'd stay another night, make sure you're all settled in." He looked over her shoulder to see the rest of her room, which looked much as it had when he was last here. It wasn't that easy to remember where everything went, especially when there were so many other things to do. "Which you are."</p>
<p>She smiled at him, although she hadn't stopped since the city was hers again. Somehow, she was now embracing all the little things that usually drove her crazy. "My shower is particularly good."</p>
<p>"It is?" He raised his eyebrows.</p>
<p>"And big enough for two." She took a step back to give him space to enter her room.</p>
<p>The door was still closing behind him as he held her close and kissed her.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>[Stargate Atlantis] Greater than before</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2007/05/15/stargate-atlantis-greater-than-before/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2007/05/15/stargate-atlantis-greater-than-before/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 15 May 2007 10:42:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: John Sheppard]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Kate Heightmeyer]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Double drabble]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Het]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2007/05/15/stargate-atlantis-greater-than-before/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: G Spoilers: None Summary: For Tanaqui who asked for more of Shep and Heightmeyer's backstory. “It is you.” John hovered in the doorway of Kate’s office, not quite going inside. She looked up from arranging the knick-knacks on her desk and smiled warmly at him. “It’s good to see you, John.” He nodded and [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: G<br />
Spoilers: None<br />
Summary: For Tanaqui who asked for more of Shep and Heightmeyer's backstory.<br />
<span id="more-137"></span><br />
“It is you.” John hovered in the doorway of Kate’s office, not quite going inside.</p>
<p>She looked up from arranging the knick-knacks on her desk and smiled warmly at him. “It’s good to see you, John.”</p>
<p>He nodded and looked around the room. “You’ve done well for yourself.”</p>
<p>She stayed where she was, waiting to see what he would do. “It was all down to you. You’re the one who encouraged me to go back to school.”</p>
<p>“I encouraged you to follow your dreams.” He folded his arms.</p>
<p>“Even though they made you uncomfortable.” He already knew she was grateful for that. She came around the desk and smiled again. “Just remember, I’m here if you need me.” She placed a hand on his arm, lightly.</p>
<p>“I will.” He smiled back.</p>
<p>At least their past association gave him an excuse to come here, she thought, because he certainly wouldn’t let anyone else get that close.</p>
<p>He didn’t quite look at her, but said, “I can’t think of anyone else I’d rather go to.”</p>
<p>She threw her arms round him, more pleased to see him than she thought she would be. It took a minute but he hugged her back.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>[Stargate Atlantis] Parting is such sweet sorrow</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2007/04/30/stargate-atlantis-parting-is-such-sweet-sorrow/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2007/04/30/stargate-atlantis-parting-is-such-sweet-sorrow/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 30 Apr 2007 10:36:33 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: John Sheppard]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Kate Heightmeyer]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Drabble]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Het]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2007/04/30/stargate-atlantis-parting-is-such-sweet-sorrow/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: G Spoilers: None Summary: For Tanaqui who asked for: a drabble about Shep's previous experience(s) with Kate Heightmeyer that lead to him ask her to talk to Teyla in "The Gift". “Don’t go.” John’s face was buried in her hair. “Don’t mess with people’s minds.” “After you helped me get this far?” Kate smiled [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: G<br />
Spoilers: None<br />
Summary: For Tanaqui who asked for: a drabble about Shep's previous experience(s) with Kate Heightmeyer that lead to him ask her to talk to Teyla in "The Gift".<br />
<span id="more-136"></span><br />
“Don’t go.” John’s face was buried in her hair. “Don’t mess with people’s minds.”</p>
<p>“After you helped me get this far?” Kate smiled and shook her head free of him. “I’m going to learn to help them. I’m not telling you not to go to Afghanistan and kill people.”</p>
<p>“Will we ever meet again?” he asked, wistfully.</p>
<p>“Maybe in another life, on another world.”</p>
<p>He smiled and kissed her. “It’s not goodbye…”</p>
<p>“Look after your wonderful brain.”</p>
<p>“Don’t injure that beautiful body you’ve got.”</p>
<p>She smiled at the compliment, and they parted, separated by sea, war and their different careers.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>[Stargate Atlantis] Overload (The Big Battle Remix)</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2007/04/07/stargate-atlantis-overload-the-big-battle-remix/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2007/04/07/stargate-atlantis-overload-the-big-battle-remix/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 07 Apr 2007 21:05:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Ben Callahan]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Elizabeth Weir]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: John Sheppard]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Vignette]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Gen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Written for: Remix]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2007/04/07/stargate-atlantis-overload-the-big-battle-remix/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: PG-13 Beta: by Tanaqui without whom this would not be nearly so good Spoilers: None Summary: A simple mission goes horribly wrong Notes: Remix of Overload by Shunda Sergeant Ben Callahan breathed in the fresh air as he walked alongside Dr Weir, savoring the fine weather this planet offered them. It had been an [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: PG-13<br />
Beta: by Tanaqui without whom this would not be nearly so good<br />
Spoilers: None<br />
Summary: A simple mission goes horribly wrong<br />
Notes: Remix of <a href="http://sugar-water.com/ink/overload.php">Overload</a> by Shunda<br />
<span id="more-87"></span><br />
Sergeant Ben Callahan breathed in the fresh air as he walked alongside Dr Weir, savoring the fine weather this planet offered them. It had been an easy trip and he was enjoying the chance to relax off world.</p>
<p>However, the place had taken a little getting used to: with its bright colors it looked like something his five year old nephew would paint. It hadn't seemed quite real to him at first, and then the clash of the bright green grass and the purple earth beneath made him feel ill. It was only now that they were headed back that he realized it had stopped bothering him, and he found he had forgotten what the countryside back on Earth looked like. Although perhaps that could be due to living in a city in the middle of an ocean for the past year.</p>
<p>The first he'd heard of this mission to escort Dr Weir during her negotiations with the Teurians was at the official briefing she'd given them that morning. Which had been followed by an unofficial briefing from Colonel Sheppard. Callahan was not going to admit it, but he had gotten lost during Dr Weir's briefing as to the specifics of what she hoped to accomplish. Since he was just the grunt it didn't matter too much. And he'd had no trouble understanding the Colonel's aims: make sure Dr Weir came back alive.</p>
<p>~*~*~</p>
<p>"Elizabeth doesn't have any combat experience, remember that," Sheppard said, looking closely at each of them in turn.</p>
<p>Major Dean straightened his shoulders and answered for them. "Don't worry, sir. I'm sure we can keep an eye on her between us." They were marines, after all, and that was what they were trained to do.</p>
<p>Sheppard brushed his fingers along his handgun. "Maybe you should take Ronon with you?"</p>
<p>"If you think that's necessary, sir." Dean's answer was diplomatic enough, but he scowled as he said it.</p>
<p>It was obvious that Sheppard didn't trust them. Which was unfair, because they'd only had that one screw-up, and that was months ago. Besides, no one actually died. Well, they were alive now, at least.</p>
<p>Anyway, they'd been on plenty of missions on their own without needing any help from an outsider. Especially from someone who might've demonstrated his ability to take any of the marines out in unarmed combat with one hand behind his back, but where it was impossible to tell whose side he was really on. Though Callahan certainly wouldn't want to find Ronon as his enemy.</p>
<p>Sheppard coughed and took his hand away from his gun. "Well, I'm sure you'll be fine without him." He didn't look convinced, though. "I think he has plans anyway."</p>
<p>After Sheppard let them go, Callahan wondered why he had bothered with the briefing at all. Only last week they'd accompanied some scientists off world just fine. Some of the doctors had been edgier than others, but no one had suggested their team couldn't handle the mission on their own.</p>
<p>One of them, a cute red-head called Maria Bennett, had constantly speculated about the relationship between Sheppard and Weir. Maria apparently knew it all, but he'd dismissed her tales as idle gossip. She'd even gone on about it when they'd had dinner together, although he'd quickly found far better things to talk about with her.</p>
<p>He'd put the whole thing out of his mind - until now. He was reminded of it as they waited for the Gate to dial. Sheppard was leaning over the balcony, the fingers of one hand drumming against his 9mm and he only stilled when Dr Weir looked up at him. From behind her, Callahan couldn't tell exactly what she said or did. When she turned back to face the gate, he took to drumming his fingers on the rail instead.</p>
<p>Now, Callahan wondered if there wasn't some truth to the rumors after all. He could ask Maria tonight. As he stepped through the gate with Dr Weir and the rest of his team, he smiled in anticipation of their date.</p>
<p>~*~*~</p>
<p>Following Sheppard's directive seemed simple enough, since all they did was sit around while Dr Weir negotiated - whatever that involved. Callahan didn't know, because they weren't allowed in. Turned out Teurian women made the decisions, and the men weren't allowed in on the deliberations. Dean had been unhappy about it at first, but Dr Weir reassured him she would be all right on her own. In the end, Dean made the rest of the team give their word not to volunteer information about this particular aspect of the mission to Sheppard. Callahan had no intention of telling the Colonel - explaining to the CO why you hadn't obeyed his orders to the letter never ended well. His future plans certainly didn't include demotion.</p>
<p>The only other excitement the whole time had been when Lieutenant Guthrie managed to accidentally annoy the locals. All he'd done was pick a flower, but the abrupt silence had immediately told them it'd been a bad idea.</p>
<p>Major Dean had managed to clear up the misunderstanding without having to interrupt the negotiations. But only by promising them all sorts of other plants from Earth, some of which Callahan was not even sure they had on Atlantis. It seemed to keep the Teurians happy enough, though, and Dr Weir could shout at them later.</p>
<p>Afterwards, on their way back to the Gate, the mood was easy-going, helped in part by Dr Weir telling them the negotiations had gone well. Guthrie even turned to walk backwards and joke with her.</p>
<p>"So, they've agreed to trade for shoes?"</p>
<p>Dean rolled his eyes, but Dr Weir saw the funny side. "The Teurian women take their shoes very seriously." She put her hands in her pockets. "In fact, the Teurian leader particularly admired yours, Lieutenant."</p>
<p>Guthrie's eyes flicked down briefly to study his sensible boots, before he turned back, suitably beaten. They were still laughing when they approached the Gate and Dean told Callahan to dial Atlantis.</p>
<p>He'd only managed the first chevron when Stubbs shouted, "Ambush!"</p>
<p>In the blink of an eye, Callahan had his P90 out and pointed at the enemy: Teurian warriors. Armed with only knives, but still dangerous. And so many. Always more to replace those that fell. It was impossible to tell how many more were lurking in the long grass. They seemed to spring up out of nowhere, their clothes - the same green with purple splotches as the landscape - camouflaging them much better than the Atlantean team. Bullets rained from their P90s but their ammo would soon run out. They had not been prepared for a battle like this.</p>
<p>One of the Teurians got past Callahan's guard while he was trying to aim in too many directions at once. He squeezed off a killing shot at the last minute, but the Teurian stuck his knife in Callahan's leg as he went down. Callahan had to grit his teeth to keep from crying out while he struggled to stay on his feet.</p>
<p>"What the hell?" Dr Weir's voice came from the other side of the DHD. Glancing sideways, Callahan saw her crouched beside it. She was low enough to protect most of her, but high enough she could still see what was going on. As he focused on her, he saw a Teurian racing towards her. Callahan turned and shot past her to take him out. Dr Weir dropped to the floor, her hands over her head.</p>
<p>"Stay down, ma'am," Callahan shouted back, over the noise. The Teurians screamed louder than the rattle of their P90s.</p>
<p>No time to look round to see if she was doing as she was told because, out of the corner of his eye, he saw Dean go down quite spectacularly, his guts spilling out of his stomach. His body hit the ground with a thud, making Callahan wince.</p>
<p>"Man down!" That was Stubbs. Dr Weir scrambled across the grass to the Major, fell to her knees and pressed her hands to his wound. Callahan expected she knew as well as he did it wouldn't make any difference, but it was hard to stand idly by and watch your colleagues die.</p>
<p>The red blood mingled with the bright green of the grass and Callahan could see it was not just Dean's. No way to win this; they had to get out of here. He shouted to Guthrie to cover him and turned to dial home.</p>
<p>He slapped his hand down on the DHD but only got as far as the second chevron. A sudden, sharp pain in his back forced him to his knees. He gripped the DHD, and his knuckles went white as he struggled to hold himself up. He wondered where Guthrie was but didn't have the strength to call out to him. Looking further down, he felt sick at the point of a knife sticking out of his stomach.</p>
<p>He wished the Teurians would leave him be, but could feel his skin crawl as he heard more massing behind him. Grunting with the effort, he lifted himself to his feet. One hand still gripping the DHD, he dialed with the other. There were cold knives against his skin, slashing through his clothes. The blood that dripped down his legs was warm and wet.</p>
<p>It felt like an eternity, but finally he punched the center crystal. Distantly, he heard the gate whoosh open. Job done, he let go and dropped to the floor. Rolling onto his side meant narrowly escaping a killing blow. His hand grasped his 9mm; the Teurian never saw him coming. He had to roll again to avoid being crushed when the Teurian fell.</p>
<p>He tried to take a deep breath, but the pain made him cough. The blood from his mouth added to the pool on the ground. But there was no time to stop. Looking up, he saw another Teurian standing over Dr Weir. He no longer had the breath to shout.</p>
<p>Stubbs was there, but three others were quickly onto him for his troubles. Dr Weir was too busy vomiting on her shoes to notice.</p>
<p>Callahan turned to Guthrie - his last hope. But he wasn't doing so well. As Callahan watched, the blood that spurted out slowed and stopped.</p>
<p>Callahan shut his eyes, his ears ringing in the sudden quiet. How could the Teurians possibly justify this?</p>
<p>He knew it was up to him. With a super-human effort he didn't even know he had in him, he rose to his feet. He stumbled over the bodies that littered the ground as he made his way to Dr Weir. She didn't protest as he scooped her up. The Gate was only a few steps away, but each step was a struggle. A cry behind him was repeated by the crowd of Teurians still alive. He shivered at the sound as he flung Dr Weir through the Gate and dived through not far behind her.</p>
<p>He got a brief glimpse of Atlantis - home - and Colonel Sheppard running towards them, before everything went black.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>[Stargate Atlantis] Never Easy</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2006/12/11/stargate-atlantis-never-easy/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2006/12/11/stargate-atlantis-never-easy/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 11 Dec 2006 21:10:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Elizabeth Weir]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Jack O'Neill]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Short story]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pairing: Jack/Elizabeth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Het]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Written for: Stargate Rare Pairings Ficathon]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2006/12/11/stargate-atlantis-never-easy/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: PG-13 Pairing: Elizabeth/Jack Spoilers: 306 The Real World and 310 The Return part 1 Beta: tanaquisga who made it much better Summary: written for irony_rocks who asked for: 1) The next time Elizabeth sees Jack O'Neill, for real, she tells him about the events of "The Real World." 2) cake 3) Atlantis-based Until John [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: PG-13<br />
Pairing: Elizabeth/Jack<br />
Spoilers: 306 The Real World and 310 The Return part 1<br />
Beta: tanaquisga who made it much better<br />
Summary: written for irony_rocks who asked for:<br />
1) The next time Elizabeth sees Jack O'Neill, for real, she tells him about the events of "The Real World."<br />
2) cake<br />
3) Atlantis-based<br />
<span id="more-88"></span><br />
Until John interrupted her, Elizabeth felt that she had been doing quite well with her packing. Although admittedly it had been going slowly. She found her possessions held so many memories that she ended up doing more thinking that actual packing. Until she had pulled everything out she had not realized how much she had accumulated in the past two and a half years since they first came to Atlantis. Seeing it disappear again into crates only reinforced the message that they were leaving and not coming back.</p>
<p>After John left she got lost in thought for a while, before she decided to throw the contents of her office into boxes and bring them down to her room. Which was completely illogical, she knew, and meant that she could not see her floor for work-related boxes. Her bed had already disappeared under all the books she had begun piling there, and her desk was covered in clothes. She no longer cared about how much sense any of it made, since nothing made sense any more anyway.</p>
<p>By the time Jack O'Neill knocked at her door, she was glad of the distraction.</p>
<p>"Hi." He had a shy grin that she would not have expected to see on him. "Can I come in?"</p>
<p>"Um." She looked round at what was normally a neat and tidy place where she did not spend much time. "Sure," she said eventually, hopping back over to the bed to clear a corner. There was a chair somewhere in the room but she could not quite see it. "Sit down." She indicated the small space on the bed.</p>
<p>Jack grinned at her and sat. He had a box with him which he put down behind him, risking losing it in the mess of Elizabeth's possessions. She wondered what was in it but wanted to know even more what he was doing here. Maybe he just did not have anything to do while everyone else was busy packing. Not that she wasn't happy to see him, even if it meant that she would end up finishing her packing in a rush in the morning now. Although, she had to admit, Jack being here probably did not really change that, the rate she had been going.</p>
<p>"Sorry about the mess," she said. She took another pile of books from the bed and balanced them on a box that was mostly flat with files. It turned out not to be flat enough, because they slid off, with most landing between that box and its neighbor and two ending up under the bed.</p>
<p>"You should see my office. And that's just on a daily basis."</p>
<p>She smiled, knowing he was lying - the Air Force tended to create tidy people out of messy ones. Gingerly, she sat on the edge of the bed. She winced as she felt various things slide towards her. "So, to what do I owe the pleasure of a visit from the esteemed General O'Neill?"</p>
<p>"Just Jack. We're not at work now." He waggled a finger at her. "We've been through this before. And I wanted to apologize. Again."</p>
<p>She shook her head. "It's not your fault. I know you did everything you could."</p>
<p>"I just wish I could have left that ass, Woolsey on Earth. Then maybe you could have stayed."</p>
<p>"We can't change the past; what's done is done." She guessed the platitude probably helped him as little as it did her. The trite words reminded her of something that had happened not so long ago that, suddenly seeing Jack again, now seemed so strange. "Speaking of the past, I wanted to thank you."</p>
<p>He frowned. "You did?"</p>
<p>"Yes." She paused for a moment. "This is going to sound weird."</p>
<p>"I work with the SGC. I deal with the wacky every day. Did I tell you about the time I had the Ancients' knowledge downloaded into my brain?"</p>
<p>Elizabeth smiled. She could hardly forget, given he had done that right before they first met. She had read reports of the previous time that had happened to him and had thought he was brave for willingly doing it a second time. Her limited experience of Air Force Colonels meant she had not expected it of him. Now that she knew Jack better, she wondered how she could ever have thought anything less of him.</p>
<p>"I was attacked by the Replicators recently." She folded her hands on her lap and looked down at them. "Well, it was their nanites really. They made me think I was back on Earth, that the Stargate program didn't exist and I was going mad."</p>
<p>"As attacks go, it could have been worse."</p>
<p>As she looked up she saw him raise his eyebrows at her. She tucked an errant lock of her hair back behind her ear as she thought about what could have happened. "Except that it would have killed me eventually. Carson told me afterwards the nanites were trying to convert my body into a Replicator."</p>
<p>"Those nasty... microscopic beings."</p>
<p>She had to bite her lip to keep from smiling. "Actually, they're smaller than can be seen under an ordinary microscope."</p>
<p>He waved his hand. "Details."</p>
<p>Shaking her head, she continued with her story. "Anyway, in that world, in my head, we still met, even though there was no Stargate. You called me in to help with a treaty against the proliferation of nuclear weapons."</p>
<p>"Which sounds exactly like the sort of thing you're qualified for." He nodded his head at his words.</p>
<p>"That's probably why it seemed so real. You were really great, helping get on with my life after I thought I had a nervous breakdown, and being a friend. I just feel like I should thank you for what you did. The you in my head."</p>
<p>"Well, in that case, you're welcome." He frowned. "I think."</p>
<p>"Of course, after that it turned out you were really a nanite, trying to keep me in that world so they could take over my brain more easily, but...." She shrugged. It was generally better not to dwell on that too much.</p>
<p>"Ah, well, easy come, easy go. At least I was mostly the good guy."</p>
<p>She could not help but laugh at that. Now that she had said it out loud and told him what happened, it somehow seemed more unreal. It did feel good to laugh, though. There had not been much opportunity for that lately, but Jack always had a talent for finding the humor in any situation. That was partly why she liked him so much.</p>
<p>"Aren't you going to ask what's in the box?" he asked, when she had sobered.</p>
<p>"I wondered if you were going to keep me in suspense."</p>
<p>"Well, if you hadn't hijacked the conversation.... I planned what I was going to say and everything."</p>
<p>He looked so terribly serious for a minute that she felt compelled to hide her grin behind a hand.</p>
<p>Without giving her a chance to ask, he said, "I brought you cake."</p>
<p>Elizabeth frowned. "Is this an Athosian dish or did someone--?"</p>
<p>"It's one of Sergeant Siler's creations. Apparently he's doing a cake decorating course in the evenings and he sent this over as a celebration of Atlantis, so he said."</p>
<p>She tried for a mental image of Siler and icing but it was just not possible. He was good with a wrench but cakes were a whole different thing. "You're kidding me?"</p>
<p>"No." He fished the box out from behind him and opened the lid dramatically.</p>
<p>She leaned over to see in. "Wow," she breathed. "If he ever gets tired of working at the SGC, he's definitely got an alternative career." It was only a small, round sponge cake, but somehow Siler had managed to ice a Stargate on it. Some of the tiny symbols were even identifiable from the Milky Way Gates.</p>
<p>Jack angled the box towards him so he could get a better view. "I don't believe it."</p>
<p>His words surprised her. "You didn't look?"</p>
<p>"I promised Siler faithfully I wouldn't spoil the surprise."</p>
<p>"And you weren't tempted?" she asked, with a grin.</p>
<p>He sighed and gave her a look. "I'll have you know I can always be trusted to keep my word. Well, mostly. Probably."</p>
<p>She shook her head. "I'm sure I have a knife somewhere." She frowned. "I definitely saw one earlier." She stood and picked her way across the floor to root around the desk. When she moved a stack of clothes, she could not stop some of her underwear from falling. She thought she saw a pair of panties disappear inside a thick file on John Sheppard but could not quite care about that at the moment. Perhaps it would give someone a good laugh later.</p>
<p>The knife turned out to be in a different pile entirely. She did not even remember thinking it would be a good idea to wrap a sharp knife in a towel, but obviously she had done it anyway. It did at least mean it was probably clean enough.</p>
<p>Getting back over to the bed was equally fraught, especially now she was in danger of stabbing something on the way, but she managed to make it without incident.</p>
<p>Standing in front of Jack, who held the cake box on his lap, she said, "It almost seems a shame to cut it."</p>
<p>"It was made to be eaten."</p>
<p>Elizabeth gave him a look.</p>
<p>He shrugged. "That's what Siler told me."</p>
<p>She rolled her eyes, cut two slices and slid them out, passing one over to Jack. He put the box, with the knife now in it, on her nightstand. There was just enough space to perch beside him on a small pile of books, so she did so. She took a bite of her piece, one hand underneath to catch any crumbs, not that it mattered much now. She closed her eyes, savoring the taste. It was very good cake; she wondered if Siler had made as well as decorated it.</p>
<p>When she opened her eyes again to take another bite she saw Jack grinning at her. "What's so funny?"</p>
<p>"I can tell you're really enjoying that."</p>
<p>"I am." Another mouthful finished the slice off. Let Jack think whatever he wanted. It was good cake.</p>
<p>"You have a crumb," he said, reaching out one hand to brush his thumb gently against the corner of her mouth.</p>
<p>She looked at him as he did so, but his eyes were on her lips. Yet his hand lingered even after he was finished. She wondered if he was going to do something more, but his eyes did not meet hers and she could not guess what he was thinking. On impulse she turned her head to press a kiss to his palm.</p>
<p>He took his hand away. "This probably isn't the best time. You're upset about leaving Atlantis."</p>
<p>She stood up and turned away from him, so he would not be able to see the expression on her face. "This wasn't what you came here for. I'm sorry." With living in different galaxies they had not seen much of each other recently. Maybe he really had turned up just to offer her cake, as unlikely as it seemed. But his being there had stirred up all her old feelings.</p>
<p>"I didn't say that exactly."</p>
<p>She heard him stand, and then he was behind her, one hand on her shoulder, warming it with his touch. With his other hand, he gently brushed the hair away from her neck. She could feel every tiny part of her skin his fingers touched. She closed her eyes, wondering what he would do next, trying to decide if she should respond the way she wanted to, or whether she should stop him. After all, he spoke the truth; she was looking for someone to make her world right again and this was not necessarily the best way to do it.</p>
<p>The decision was taken away from her when she felt his lips against her neck. "Jack," she began, a little unsteadily, "I don't want you to do this just to offer comfort."</p>
<p>He spun her round and kissed her, his lips firm on hers. Her arms went round his neck; one of his was around her waist, pulling her to him. "Any version of me," he said, when they parted, "would always help any version of you. Either way, I want to do this. You're beautiful, smart, and you laugh at my jokes."</p>
<p>She smiled in response and touched his cheek with one hand. This time, she pulled him down to her for another kiss, enjoying the taste of the cake that still lingered. They both jumped at a crash outside her door, followed by shouting. She hoped no one had dropped anything fragile. Just because they were going back to Earth did not necessarily mean they did not need some of this stuff.</p>
<p>She bit her lip, wondering whether she should go out and check. Jack, who was still holding onto her, took the decision out of her hands by maneuvering them round so the back of her legs hit the bed. She fell on it, with him on top of her, and the world outside of the two of them was mostly forgotten as he reminded her how good a kisser he was. However, she was distracted by the books with hard corners under her back, and the way some of them fell onto the floor as Jack moved round to apply his mouth to other parts of her body.</p>
<p>"It's no good," she said, as he wrestled with taking her top off. She stilled her hands on his chest, under his shirt. She almost wished he had his jacket on; he looked good in uniform. "This is just too uncomfortable."</p>
<p>"Oh." He sat up and awkwardly pulled his shirt back into place.</p>
<p>She had to bite her lip to keep from smiling. "I meant the bed, you idiot." To punctuate the point she threw a book that had been trying to cut her spine in two at him.</p>
<p>He caught it easily, with one hand, and turned it over to look at the cover. "Danielle Steele?"</p>
<p>She blushed. "One of my guilty pleasures." She really wished she had looked more carefully at what she had thrown before she did it. "Why don't you help me pack? Then there'll be more space on the bed." She began piling things up, although she was still not sure where she was going to fit it all.</p>
<p>Jack, though, solved the problem by stripping the blanket and taking everything else with it, raining books onto boxes and leaving her holding a file slightly awkwardly. "I can't wait that long," he said, taking the file off her and sending it with wild abandon to join the others before attacking her top enthusiastically, so that he had it off before she even had time to think. By the time he had her on her back again, with his mouth making its way towards her breasts, she was not going to complain. It was a much better way of spending her last night in Atlantis.</p>
<p>~*~*~*~</p>
<p>Afterwards, while Jack slept, Elizabeth unearthed her robe from under a pile of papers and stood at the window. She had seen this view a thousand times; it was etched on her brain; but that no longer seemed like enough. When they got here she had not missed Earth that much: maybe because she had been so busy. She was already feeling homesick for Atlantis, and they had not even left yet.</p>
<p>She gave a sigh and sat down on the floor: her muscles protested as they begun to ache from the distraction Jack had given her. Now she was alone - or nearly - she allowed a tear to fall down her cheek unchecked. It was just the start, though, because more followed.</p>
<p>She did not even hear Jack get up, and only knew he was there when she felt his arms around her. She leant her head against his chest for a minute and told herself she was being stupid. This was the Ancients' city: they had every right to it, whereas she had none. Lifting her head, she gave him a small smile and a kiss. He did not let go but settled down next to her.</p>
<p>"When you get back, give me a call," he said. "I'll tidy my place for you."</p>
<p>Jack somehow always knew what to say to make her feel better.</p>
<p>"Just so we can make it messy again," he added.</p>
<p>She laughed and she felt him laugh too.</p>
<p>"It will be just like in the nanite world," he went on. "Except without the nanites and with the Stargate program still existing."</p>
<p>It was only now that she trusted her voice to speak. "And what exactly do you think we got up to?"</p>
<p>"I wouldn't have been able to resist you."</p>
<p>"Except you were really a nanite...."</p>
<p>"Oh, well...."</p>
<p>She smiled to herself. She was not going to tell him exactly what had gone on between the two of them. Not yet, anyway.</p>
<p>Fortunately, given her lack of success with stalling tactics around him, he changed the subject. "What are we looking at?"</p>
<p>"Over there," she pointed towards a tower capped with a tall spike, "the moon is setting and the sun will rise. There are colors in the sky never seen on Earth."</p>
<p>"I bet I've seen better."</p>
<p>"Oh, yes?" She turned to face him. "Can you prove it?"</p>
<p>"I'm sure Daniel has photos. I'll get him to find them when we get back to the SGC."</p>
<p>"And what if you're wrong, and an Atlantis dawn is the best sunrise in two galaxies?"</p>
<p>"I'll buy you dinner. But I'll be right, and you'll be buying."</p>
<p>He grinned at her, and she could not but help return the grin; his happiness was infectious. She kissed him again, to show him how much she appreciated him. He pulled her closer and broke off exploring her lips to to kiss along her jaw and nibble at her ear.</p>
<p>They nearly missed the sun rising.</p>
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		<title>[Stargate Atlantis] Dear Jack (The Elizabethan Remix)</title>
		<link>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2006/03/20/stargate-atlantis-dear-jack-the-elizabethan-remix/</link>
		<comments>http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2006/03/20/stargate-atlantis-dear-jack-the-elizabethan-remix/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 20 Mar 2006 21:23:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Nic</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Stargate Atlantis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Elizabeth Weir]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Ronon Dex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Character: Teyla Emmagen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Length: Short story]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pairing: Elizabeth/Ronon]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Type: Het]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Written for: Remix]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.paranoidangel.me.uk/fanfic/2006/03/20/stargate-atlantis-dear-jack-the-elizabethan-remix/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Rating: PG Pairing: Elizabeth/Ronon Beta: wannatee_1984 Spoilers: Critical Mass Summary: An e-mail from General O'Neill prompts Elizabeth to examine her actions towards Kavanagh in Critical Mass. Notes: Remix of From Pegasus, With Love by Soleta Elizabeth Weir was, like many of the current residents of Atlantis, having a quiet day. It made for a very [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Rating: PG<br />
Pairing: Elizabeth/Ronon<br />
Beta: wannatee_1984<br />
Spoilers: Critical Mass<br />
Summary: An e-mail from General O'Neill prompts Elizabeth to examine her actions towards Kavanagh in Critical Mass.<br />
Notes: Remix of <a href="http://banbury-tales.livejournal.com/2618.html">From Pegasus, With Love</a> by Soleta<br />
<span id="more-92"></span><br />
Elizabeth Weir was, like many of the current residents of Atlantis, having a quiet day. It made for a very welcomed and refreshing change, so she was determined to take advantage of it while it lasted, all the while waiting for a new emergency to present itself. She'd had a long lie-in - well, long in comparison to how much she usually got, which was none at all - and had made a start on her reading. Many people had brought books with them on the mission and a sort of lending library had been set up in Atlantis. The one she had currently borrowed was one she had been meaning to read for years but never seemed to have the time for. Indulging her secret passion for Jane Austen novels was definitely a low priority these days.</p>
<p>She was feeling much more enthusiastic about facing the day, having had the chance to spend an hour waking up and then pampering herself, rather than the usual rushed leap out of bed and into clean clothes. Knowing in advance that her usual 9 o'clock meeting was unlikely to be too onerous she had brought her breakfast with her. She turned up to find her department heads had the same idea and they all had matching cups of coffee and bowls of something that mostly resembled oatmeal. Even if it did not quite taste like it, it was all least nutritious and kept her full until lunch time.</p>
<p>After that she had been prepared to take Rodney's gripes with a smile but unusually, he did not have any. Probably because he finally had some time to do all the things he had been telling her for weeks he never got the chance to get to. The meeting had still taken just over an hour, however, but today it was because they had spent half of that time joking with each other, rather than trying to solve the latest crisis, as was more usual. It was not the first time this had happened but it had become rare enough that she was struggling to remember how long ago it had been. It had reminded her of the meetings they used to have in Antarctica when they were not under so many time pressures. She wished more of the ones they had here were like that.</p>
<p>In fairly high spirits after the meeting, and feeling cheered by the current turn of events (or lack of them), she intended to spend her morning working through a pile of paperwork that she had been meaning to do for days and was now becoming quite urgent. First, though, she checked to see if there was anything more important she needed to deal with. She was surprised to find an e-mail from General O'Neill had just arrived, for he didn't write often.</p>
<p>From: j.oneill@airforce.gov<br />
To: e.weir@atlantis.gov<br />
CC: j.sheppard@atlantis.gov<br />
Date: Tues, May 2, 2006 10:18 AM<br />
Subject: You tortured Kavanagh?!</p>
<p>Are you <em>insane?</em></p>
<p>At least you didn't record it.</p>
<p>(Is this Ronon guy as impressive as he sounds?)</p>
<p>Jack</p>
<p><small>This information is classified. Distribution to anyone without the proper security clearance carries consequences including and not limited to the following; fines up to $30, 000 or the equivalent; up to ten (10) years in federal prison; revocation of security clearance; revocation of citizenship or resident alien status; and/or deportment.</small></p>
<p>attachments: akavanagh1.jpg, akavanagh2.jpg</p>
<p>It only took her a couple of minutes to read through the attachments and establish that Kavanagh had complained about her, unsurprisingly. She could not blame him. Even though Ronon had not touched him the threat was certainly there and even if he had been guilty it was still completely unjustified. They were supposed to be the good guys and that meant they did not torture people, even if it might mean the safety of the city. The only bright spot was that he had certainly complained before and probably on more than one occasion. With any luck he had cried wolf too many times and Jack would just ignore him.</p>
<p>That did not make it right, though, and was something she had been unable to justify to herself on the nights she had spent tossing and turning, trying to make sense of it all. Most of the time other events conspired to put it out of her mind, but eventually she had managed to reconcile herself to the fact that she could not change the past and she needed to be consider her options more carefully in future. She really did not need this bringing up again, even though she had felt guilty for escaping justice for it. In the cold light of day she wondered if she had been insane, or just desperate. She replied quickly, wanted to know Jack's perspective, even if he did not have all the facts yet.</p>
<p>From: e.weir@atlantis.gov<br />
To: j.oneill@airforce.gov<br />
CC: j.sheppard@atlantis.gov<br />
Date: Tues, May 2, 2006 10:22 AM<br />
Subject: Re: You tortured Kavanagh?!</p>
<p>Don't remind me.</p>
<p>Are we in trouble?</p>
<p>Elizabeth</p>
<p><small>This information is classified. Distribution to anyone without the proper security clearance carries consequences including and not limited to the following; fines up to $30, 000 or the equivalent; up to ten (10) years in federal prison; revocation of security clearance; revocation of citizenship or resident alien status; and/or deportment.</small></p>
<p>She tried to turn back to her paperwork, knowing it could take Jack a while to respond, depending on how busy he was, but she could not concentrate any more. She found herself looking round the room and staring for a while at the activity outside her office. Most of the technicians working there had turned round in their chairs to chat and were currently laughing. If she went out there they might stop and she did not want to spoil their fun. Even if they did not and they let her into the joke she was not really in the mood for it.</p>
<p>She could not argue that she did not know what she had asked Ronon to do because she knew what he was capable of and she had seen the after effects of torture on more than one occasion. It had not been pleasant. She had tried, in the past, to convince people it was not the answer to their problems and now she had expected it to solve theirs, when an evacuation would have saved lives, if not the Stargate and the way home.</p>
<p>If she was in trouble then there was no doubt in her mind that she would be asked to step down. She wondered if she should anyway. It was rapidly becoming obvious, in the face of first the Wraith threat and now the one from The Trust, that Atlantis needed a leader who would endorse more aggressive solutions to what were fast becoming military problems. It did not need one whose main focus was on finding allies. She almost wished for a crisis to break up the quiet day and take her mind off things.</p>
<p>Rubbing her temples it was clear that she was not going to get any work done with this hanging over her. And sitting at the computer, staring at her inbox was not going to get Jack to reply any faster. She wished they were not so far away so she could see him in person to explain it to him properly. Before her thoughts could depress her any more than they already were, she decided to go for a walk.</p>
<p>She did not have any particular destination in mind and just wandered through the corridors. She passed people as she went, some of whom were taking the opportunity to catch up on non-urgent tasks, and others were pursuing more social activities. She returned their smiled greetings and tried to remind herself that with the exception of Kavanagh, who was no longer in Atlantis anyway, they were all happy with her work. But if they had known what she had done would they still feel the same? If she left she would miss not only Atlantis but also all these people that had become her friends.</p>
<p>Thinking that exercise might help she turned towards the gym. She had only just got out of the transporter when she heard grunts, clashes and sounds of flesh meeting floor, and her heart sped up in slightly horrified anticipation, in case she had got her wish. Walking gingerly round the corner she found the door was open and practice was in full swing. She took a deep calming breath and peered in.</p>
<p>One of the new young marines was just pushing himself up from the mat on the floor and he touched foreheads with Teyla before grinning and returning to a line of men and women along the side of the room. Some jostling went on, no doubt he was getting ribbed about being beaten by a girl. Elizabeth smiled. No one who had been here for longer than a few days thought about going up against Teyla hand-to-hand and winning, no matter how much training they'd had. Real life combat was obviously a far better learning tool, as much as Elizabeth wished none of them had to go through that.</p>
<p>While she was distracted by the marines, Ronon had stepped up. Although Teyla held a stick in each hand, Ronon had no weapons and Elizabeth thought that must be an unfair fight. As she watched she discovered she had forgotten how good Ronon was; how good he'd had to be to survive. It still amazed her - she was not sure if any of her people would have lived so long if they had been in the same situation.</p>
<p>She had intended to watch the fight but her eye could not help but be drawn to Ronon. As he dodged and parried Teyla's sticks he made it look easy, although Elizabeth knew it was actually an instinct he would not soon lose. He had obviously not been idle while Teyla fought because there was already a layer of sweat coating his skin and he could not be working that hard yet. His muscles tensed and relaxed as he attacked Teyla and blocked her attacks in return. Elizabeth smiled as she remembered the workout she and Ronon had gotten two nights ago. Now it seemed like it was too long ago.</p>
<p>She allowed herself to get caught up in her memories, which eased her mood a little. But by doing so she was not concentrating on what was happening around her and missed Teyla taking Ronon down. Ronon seemed good-natured about it, though, and was laughing as he allowed Teyla to help him up. Elizabeth had to give herself a mental shake to pull her thoughts back into ones that were acceptable for company and more related to current events.</p>
<p>The class was dismissed and Elizabeth nodded back to the marines filing out as she stepped in.</p>
<p>"Doctor Weir," Teyla greeted her, as she left Ronon to tidy. "Is everything all right? Or are you interested in learning how to fight?"</p>
<p>"I already know," Elizabeth replied. She refused to elaborate, though. Ronon was not looking in their direction, on purpose Elizabeth thought, although she could not think why.</p>
<p>"Then was there something specific you wanted?"</p>
<p>"No, I think I just got so used to lurching from one crisis to another that I'm not sure I remember how to do nothing any more."</p>
<p>Teyla smiled. "I understand. But there is always something."</p>
<p>Having finished, Ronon interrupted their conversation to inform them, "McKay tells me there is something called 'second breakfast'," which was his way of saying goodbye.</p>
<p>Elizabeth smiled at his enthusiasm. Somehow Ronon always managed to lift her spirits, without even seeming to try. She wished she could find an excuse to join him but since she wanted something from him other than food she thought she had better not. She did not want to embarrass herself in front of whoever might be in the mess hall.</p>
<p>The rest of the gym done, Teyla had collected up her sticks to return them to the back in the window and Elizabeth rethought her exercise idea. She really needed some perspective from someone else. And to not have to pretend any more that everything was all right. Watching the Athosian she found herself twining her hands together in nervousness. Berating herself, she smoothed them against her pant legs.</p>
<p>"Teyla," she began, although she was not really sure where to start, "you heard I nearly had an innocent man tortured?"</p>
<p>Teyla had sat herself down as Elizabeth spoke, and waited until Elizabeth had seated herself in the window beside her before she answered. "I did. I am told it was necessary to save Atlantis."</p>
<p>Elizabeth wanted to get up and pace but settled for clasping her hands together tightly in her lap and not moving them. She shook her head. "It shouldn't have been. It should never be."</p>
<p>"I agree, Doctor Weir, but sometimes we have to do things we would rather not to protect our people."</p>
<p>Elizabeth wondered, for a moment, what Teyla might have had to do. But then Teyla had lived under fear of the Wraith all her life.</p>
<p>"You have a valid point, Teyla, but this man was innocent. I mean, suspicious, but innocent. And perhaps I did it because..." Teyla cocked her head and Elizabeth took a deep breath before continuing, not entirely wanting to admit what Kavanagh had suspected, "...because I didn't like him. Because I wanted it to be him. I let my emotions get the best of me and made a bad call because of it."</p>
<p>Teyla laid one hand on Elizabeth's arm. "You felt, and I believe still feel as if you let your emotions get in your way."</p>
<p>Elizabeth sighed in remorse and nodded. "Yes, on both accounts." In that accusation, Kavanagh was probably right but that was how she was, she did not know any other way to be.</p>
<p>"If you are asking for my opinion then I do not see anything wrong with that," Teyla said with a comforting smile.</p>
<p>She shook her head. "If I had been thinking rationally then perhaps we could have discovered who was responsible before it became critical and the situation wouldn't have arisen."</p>
<p>"You cannot put all the blame on yourself. If we felt you were wrong then we would tell you. You know we would not allow you to jeopardise Atlantis. Yes you may have made a bad lapse in judgement, but that in no means implies that you are a bad leader. You are after all still human, and still capable of making mistakes, leader of this base or not. "</p>
<p>She smiled at Teyla. "You're right." None of these people restrained themselves from giving their opinion when they disagreed with her or each other. "Perhaps it was justified but that still doesn't make it right."</p>
<p>"That is something I believe that only you can decide for yourself."</p>
<p>Elizabeth nodded. "Since coming here I've been finding I often have to change my opinions on what is right and what is not. My views and beliefs are constantly changing in front of my eyes and sometimes it's all just a little too much to take."</p>
<p>"Perhaps there is something about Atlantis that makes you think this way."</p>
<p>"Perhaps there is." With a smile she rose, feeling at least a little more cheered, even if she could not recapture her mood of an hour earlier. "Thank you for your advice, Teyla. I will try and take it."</p>
<p>She had only taken a few steps when Teyla called her back. Elizabeth turned in the doorway. "If there is ever anything else that you would wish a second opinion on, I am happy to advise you once more."</p>
<p>"Thank you, Teyla, that's a great comfort. I will keep you to your word."</p>
<p>A slight inclination of Teyla’s head was her reply and she left Teyla in her own devices.</p>
<p>Elizabeth returned to her office via the mess, pretending to herself that she was not disappointed that Ronon was no longer there. She got herself some more coffee, though, and stopped to watch the waves, trying not to think too much. The anticipation of a reply from Jack almost made her want to go back to her office and check her e-mail right that minute. Except that if it was bad news she did not want know. Good news and maybe she could put it behind her once more and chalk it up to experience.</p>
<p>She did not rush back up to her office, therefore, but was surprised when she arrived to find Ronon sitting at her desk, his back to the door.</p>
<p>"Hello. How was second breakfast?"</p>
<p>Ronon turned round to look up at her. "McKay was not exaggerating."</p>
<p>Like many of her conversations with Ronon she was not entirely sure how to respond, except with a smile and a small shake of her head. "That's good to hear." She moved round to her desk to sit at it and found Ronon was just finishing setting up a chessboard on it.</p>
<p>"You have e-mail," he informed her.</p>
<p>"Thank you," she said, sitting down and clicking off the standard SGC screensaver she had never quite got round to changing. Her heart sped up as she saw one was from Jack. She opened it straight away, wanting to at least put herself out of her misery.</p>
<p>From: j.oneill@airforce.gov<br />
To: e.weir@atlantis.gov<br />
CC: j.sheppard@atlantis.gov<br />
Date: Tues, May 2, 2006 11:09 AM<br />
Subject: Re: Re: You tortured Kavanagh?!</p>
<p>No, we've got bigger things to worry about. Like, say, aliens? Besides, it's he-said-she-said stuff, it's like trying to prosecute date rape cases.</p>
<p>If it were up to me, you three would be getting commendations.</p>
<p>Jack</p>
<p><small>This information is classified. Distribution to anyone without the proper security clearance carries consequences including and not limited to the following; fines up to $30, 000 or the equivalent; up to ten (10) years in federal prison; revocation of security clearance; revocation of citizenship or resident alien status; and/or deportment.</small></p>
<p>Upon reading it she closed her eyes, slumped back in her chair and breathed a sigh of relief. Her worrying suddenly seemed so silly.</p>
<p>"Everything okay?" Ronon asked her.</p>
<p>She smiled at him. "Yes, nothing to worry yourself over. I take it you would like a game?"</p>
<p>"Yes," he replied, pushing the board away from him, the white pieces towards her.</p>
<p>She sat up, moved her computer out of the way and advanced a pawn. Every time she thought she had Ronon figured out it always turned out there was more to him than met the eye. She could not quite remember how the conversation had started now but after discussing strategy in chess it turned out he wanted to find out more about it.</p>
<p>He had understood the goal of protecting the king while attacking the opposition's well enough but she had expected him to have had more trouble with the notion of the queen being the most powerful piece on the board. As it happened he had smiled and given her a look that she thought might have melted plastic. It was one of the few times when she had known exactly what he was thinking. After an initial shock she found that not only did she not mind but she reciprocated.</p>
<p>So, it had started with chess. Despite Ronon being a man of action and instinct he had picked the game up quickly. She supposed it was not that different from having to plan your life when it consisted of considering the next planet to go to avoid the Wraith. He was a willing pupil and she enjoyed teaching him. Their games always went quickly, though, as he never liked to spend too much time thinking, and if she did, or tried to, he would generally find a way of making sure she did not. Sometimes she did it on purpose and then the game would not end at all.</p>
<p>He had not completely mastered a poker face, not that it was entirely necessary for chess. But as he moved a knight he looked up and gave her what was definitely an evil grin, forcing her to concentrate on the board, to try and discover what she had missed. She could not find anything, though, which either meant he was better than she thought at chess or better than she thought at bluffing.</p>
<p>She peered up at him through her eyelashes. "You're getting good at this."</p>
<p>He slouched back in his chair, folded his arms across his chest and grinned at her. "I suggest the rock."</p>
<p>"Rook," she corrected automatically, even though he had long since refused to call it that. She had surprised herself by finding it endearing rather than annoying. Ronon reached an arm out to pick his king up and immediately put it back down again. She could not decide whether he was doing it on purpose to distract her.</p>
<p>"Okay," she said, giving in, "you got me. Why would I move my rook?"</p>
<p>"Then my queen can put you in check."</p>
<p>She glanced up at Ronon, who looked gazed back at her. She could not help but laugh in response, which felt good in comparison to the stress of the rest of the morning. She was still smiling when she spotted an opening, moved her rook as he suggested and looked back at Ronon to make his move.</p>
<p>He frowned at her and studied the board. "What did you do that for?"</p>
<p>She grinned at him. He had never won a game against her yet and refused to let her help him or go easy on him. So, although her move looked like it would benefit him, he would know that he had missed something. She thought that perhaps if he could just sit still long enough to consider all the possible ramifications of his moves then he would do much better.</p>
<p>He only thought for a couple of minutes before moving a bishop.</p>
<p>"Are you sure you want to do that?" she asked him, but at least he had realised why his suggested move was a bad idea.</p>
<p>"Yes," was his immediate answer, although he looked carefully at the board again.</p>
<p>Successfully knighting a pawn in exchange for one sacrificed earlier in the game put his king in check with only one way out. Anyone else might have given up at this point but not Ronon. There was something to be said for his determination: he always played to the bitter end. Given that he had nearly scored a draw on one occasion, she could not blame him.</p>
<p>"So, how's your morning been?" she asked him, now that the pressure was off her at least.</p>
<p>"Good."</p>
<p>Sometimes it was hard chatting with Ronon because he did not give anything away. But then it was not his sparkling conversational skills she liked about him.</p>
<p>"Any plans for this afternoon?" she asked, lightly.</p>
<p>"Sheppard said something about 'paperwork'."</p>
<p>Elizabeth smiled despite her disappointment. She was willing to bet that Sateda had not been as bureaucratic as Earth - or America, at least - and she did not envy him his afternoon.</p>
<p>"But I am free this lunch time," Ronon said as he moved his king to what would have been an excellent defense had he noticed her rook hiding on the other side of the board.</p>
<p>Moving it up, she grinned at him. "Checkmate."</p>
<p>Ronon gave a grunt and tipped his king over. "One day I will beat you."</p>
<p>"I'm looking forward to it." Not just because she liked spending time with him, but also because their chess games had a tendency to be a prelude for something else entirely. "Is there something good for lunch?"</p>
<p>"There is," he replied looking straight at her.</p>
<p>For a minute she was not entirely sure because Ronon never missed a meal. Then she remembered his second breakfast and gave him a slightly shy smile. "My quarters. One hour." Ronon's conversational skills must be rubbing off on her.</p>
<p>He gave her a smile back and left her with only one hour to spend with a pile of paperwork that she swore had grown larger since she'd been gone. Not to mention an e-mail to reply to.</p>
<p>Before she did, she read through the rest of the e-mails that seemed to have accumulated, even on a quiet morning. There was only one other on the same subject, from Teyla this time. When Elizabeth read it she discovered John must have e-mailed his team about Kavanagh, which suggested he might have been at his computer working. John did not really do sitting down and working quietly very well, so it seemed unlikely, but then she could not really blame him given what she had spent her morning doing.</p>
<p>From: telya@atlantis.gov<br />
To: j.sheppard@atlantis.gov, e.weir@atlantis.gov, ronon@atlantis.gov<br />
Date: Tues, May 2, 2006 11:31 AM<br />
Subject: Re: Fwd: You tortured Kavanagh?!</p>
<p>My apologies for not replying earlier. I am still unused to this technology.</p>
<p>I am glad that none of you are in danger any longer.</p>
<p>Teyla Emmagen</p>
<p><small>This information is classified. Distribution to anyone without the proper security clearance carries consequences including and not limited to the following; fines up to $30, 000 or the equivalent; up to ten (10) years in federal prison; revocation of security clearance; revocation of citizenship or resident alien status; and/or deportment.</small></p>
<p>The rest of her inbox confirmed that other people had taken the time to catch up too. It was hard to concentrate, with an entire hour to fill up but she simply had to get some work done while there was such a good opportunity. Her reply to Jack was not exactly a difficult one though. If he had been there in person she could have kissed him when she saw his last e-mail.</p>
<p>From: e.weir@atlantis.gov<br />
To: j.oneill@airforce.gov<br />
Date: Tues, May 2, 2006 11:58 AM<br />
Subject: We all owe you one.</p>
<p>Thanks.</p>
<p>Elizabeth</p>
<p><small>This information is classified. Distribution to anyone without the proper security clearance carries consequences including and not limited to the following; fines up to $30, 000 or the equivalent; up to ten (10) years in federal prison; revocation of security clearance; revocation of citizenship or resident alien status; and/or deportment.</small></p>
<p>She hit send and with a mischievous smile, wrote an addendum.</p>
<p>From: e.weir@atlantis.gov<br />
To: j.oneill@airforce.gov<br />
Date: Tues, May 2, 2006 11:59 AM<br />
Subject: Ronon</p>
<p>And he's better. In every way.</p>
<p>Elizabeth</p>
<p><small>This information is classified. Distribution to anyone without the proper security clearance carries consequences including and not limited to the following; fines up to $30, 000 or the equivalent; up to ten (10) years in federal prison; revocation of security clearance; revocation of citizenship or resident alien status; and/or deportment.</small></p>
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