"Give it back!"

"No, I won't."

Amelia went closer and peered round a tree. She saw a boy and a girl running through the woods. The boy held a jam jar above his head and the girl was stretching to reach it.

Amelia stepped out from around the tree. "What are you doing?"

They stopped and looked at her. The boy still held the jam jar up and the girl pulled at his arm. "She's keeping ladybirds in a jam jar," the boy said. "It's cruel."

"They're mine." The girl gave an insistent pull and Amelia took advantage of her height to reach up, take the jam jar and look inside. There were hundreds of ladybirds in there. Most of them were red, but some were yellow and a few were orange.

"I think we should let them go," she said, watching them crawl up the side of the jar and flutter their wings, only to hit the lid.

The boy smiled. She returned it when she passed the jar back to him, then turned to glare at the girl while he took the lid off. The girl shrugged, but they both watched the ladybirds as they found freedom. "Look at them fly," the girl said, amazed.

"They look happier now." Amelia was pleased that she could help.

The girl smiled at her and by the time all the ladybirds had flown away home, Amelia had made two friends in Leadworth.

~*~

Rory had been the first person she told. Amelia thought that he would believe her more easily than Melody would. He'd nodded at everything and asked questions, then put on her dad's blazer when she held it out. Now she had her Raggedy Doctor, all she had to do was explain to Melody, but at least she had Rory to back her up.

"He flies around in a blue box that has a swimming pool in the library and he saves the world from aliens."

Melody frowned. "And he looks like Rory?"

"Not really." The Doctor hadn't been as neat and nor did his jacket have the sleeves rolled up so many times that there was more roll than sleeve. "It doesn't matter, it's just pretend. Rory's the Doctor, I'm helping him and you can be the alien."

Melody thought about that before saying anything. Amelia hoped she wouldn't complain and want to be something else. But she didn't. "What sort of alien?" she asked.

Amelia shrugged. "Any sort you like." The Doctor hadn't really talked about those much, so she didn't know what type of aliens he usually fought. She hadn't seen any aliens herself.

Melody grinned. "Then I'll be a slimy alien." She ran a hand down Amelia's arm and Amelia made a face, pretending Melody had left a slimy trail on her sleeve. "You'll have to catch me before I slime anyone else!" She pushed Amelia over and ran off. Amelia laughed as Rory helped her up and they chased after Melody. This was going to be her new favourite game.

~*~

Mels pulled off the wrapping paper, not caring about what else she ripped. When she picked up the jumper she held it up and made a face at it. "Where did you get this?"

"I made it," Amelia said proudly. Her mother had been teaching her to knit while it was cold and dark outside. She'd wanted to make something for her friends for Christmas and she'd been excited about knitting jumpers with pictures on the front. It had taken over a year to make all three, but now they had matching ones.

Rory had by now pulled his out, hardly ripping the paper at all, and was looking at it curiously. Mels stared at the picture on hers and tilted her head to either side while Amelia waited. Finally Mels spoke. "I give up. What is it?"

Amelia sighed. "It's a Christmas tree."

"It's a very good Christmas tree," Rory said. "Thank you. No one except my mum's ever knitted me a jumper before."

Amelia beamed. Trust Rory to say the right thing. Mels never did. She wasn't like other people.

"It looks like a green blob with tentacles," Mels said.

Amelia's face fell. She knew she wasn't that good yet, but it wasn't that bad.

"Then it would be perfect for when we're playing Raggedy Doctor," Rory said.

Mels shrugged but Amelia no longer cared what she thought. Given Rory's lack of enthusiasm for their old game recently, she had thought he was getting bored of it. So she nearly knocked him over as she hugged him and forgot Mels' opinion of her knitting.

~*~

"I can't believe you've never done this," Amy said, sitting on a branch above Rory and Mels' heads and swinging her legs.

Mels shrugged. "Never thought of it."

Mels was odd sometimes. "Everyone knows how to climb a tree."

"We'll teach you," Rory suggested. "I'll give you a boost." He leaned down, his hands out for her to step into.

"Are you sure it's safe?" Mels asked, looking down at his hands, then up at the tree.

Amy frowned. "Since when did you care about safe? Anyway, if you break something Rory'll look after you. It'll be good practise for when he's a nurse."

"I won't let you fall," Rory promised.

"The tree might not like it," Mels said, but stepped onto his hands anyway. With her hand on his shoulder, him helped lift her so she could get up to the branch beside Amy. Rory followed the traditional way and straddled the branch opposite.

"Isn't it great up here?" Amy said.

Mels made a face and pulled a leafy twig out from her hair. "If you like bark."

"You can see further than when you're on the ground," Rory pointed out.

Mels cautiously looked around, hanging onto the branch with one hand and smiled at what she saw. "See you later." She dropped down and ran off.

Rory shrugged at Amy's questioning look. "At least she'll climb a tree again."

Amy had to be satisfied with that.

~*~

"Rory!" Amy could run faster than Rory now and she caught up with him at the front door. "Rory, I get it." She hadn't needed Rory or Mels to tell her the real reason he had never looked at another girl. Even if she had needed Mels to point it out and Rory to tell her he wasn't gay. She just hadn't thought about it like that before now.

Rory didn't say anything or take his hand off the door handle. He wouldn't even look at her. "Let's go out," Amy said.

"That's what I'm doing."

She smiled at his misunderstanding. "No, I mean us. As a couple."

Now he turned to her, doing his best not to look hurt, but she knew him too well to be fooled. "You said that was impossible."

She shook her head. "That was because I thought you were gay. All this time I couldn't think about you as anything other than a friend."

"And now?" He was starting to look interested at least.

"You're my best friend. And I meant it when I said you were gorgeous."

He dropped his head, but now it was to hide his blush.

Amy giggled. "Oh, come on. It'll be fun. Just the two of us doing date-like things."

"All right." He looked up at her now, his expression sceptical, but amused.

She smiled and he returned it. Then she leaned forward and kissed him, partly to see what he would do and partly because she wanted to know what kissing Rory was like. It was brief, but he kissed back and Amy definitely wanted to do more of that.

"Friday," he said after. "Now I've got to go or I'll be late." He rushed out and left her to watch him walk down the path. Once he was out of sight she shut the door and went back upstairs to ask Mels how she'd known.

Rodney hunches over his laptop and pretends not to hear the conversation on the next table. Not that it matters because it's all in Russian, but he's pretty sure they're talking about him. After two days he's learned the Russian for American and every conversation he's heard has included the word. No matter how many times he tells them, they don't seem to be able to understand that America and Canada are two different countries. That's the military for you - they don't recruit people for their brains. With the exception of Sam Carter.

Thinking about her makes him sigh and means he doesn't notice one of the marines approaching until he sits down opposite. Rodney hasn't bothered learning anyone's name; he doesn't plan on being here long enough to care. "Yes?" he says, shortly.

"I am scientist," the man says. "You tell me what I do and I help you."

Rodney opens his mouth to point out he doesn't need any help, but the idea of being able to order someone about is just too tempting to ignore. It's also possible, if unlikely, the marine isn't completely inept; if so, this might go quicker. The sooner he can get a few naquadah generators up and running, the sooner he can get out of here. So instead he says, "Get me some food."

The marine/scientist complies; a minute later he puts a plate of something on the table next to Rodney's laptop. Rodney looks at it suspiciously. "Is that food?"

"Is good." The marine starts digging into his own plate.

Rodney picks up something from the plate that he can't identify and bites into it. He quickly discovers that, although the mystery food looks soft, it's rock hard. "Ow!" He prods at his jaw gently. "I think I've broken a tooth."

"I take you to see doctor." The marine stands up, looking worried.

Rodney shakes his head vigorously. He's met the doctor on the base: he didn't speak a word of English and prodded Rodney until he hurt all over. He isn't going back there until they got a doctor who's sympathetic. "I'll go for a walk outside. It'll take my mind off it."

"Is snowing."

Rodney sighs again. He doesn't like the cold. He decides to go find the vodka instead. It's currently the only thing keeping him sane in this alien country.

2. Antarctica

Rodney's supposed to be working with the best scientific minds on Earth. He's seen their qualifications and knows they must all be brilliant. The only trouble is that none of them are showing it and all of them are acting like children. They constantly bicker and no one listens to a word he says. If only he had the Ancient gene: it would be so much simpler.

"I can't do it," Carson announces and stomps off.

Rodney knows how he feels. He's tried the chair twice and neither time could he make it do anything at all. At least Carson can get it to light up, which should count for something.

Around him, the other scientists speak to each other in a dozen different languages, but it's the ones speaking English who make the least sense. Talking to his cat gets better results, so Rodney's learned to ignore them all. It's not as it any of them know how to get Carson to get to the chair to do anything Carson can't, or won't, make it do.

Rodney's getting a headache, so he heads outside for some quiet. It takes ten minutes just to put on all the clothes that'll make sure he doesn't freeze to death, although he wonders if anyone would notice if he didn't bother. Outside, there's nothing but snow for as far as the eye can see. It reminds him of Russia in the winter. It's not comforting.

3. M3G-212

"Oh, look," Sheppard says, putting on those stupid sunglasses. He thinks they make him look cool. Rodney has given up telling him they don't. "It's an English village."

Rodney rolls his eyes and lets Sheppard explain to Teyla why the houses with the thatched roofs remind him of England. He doesn't think Sheppard has ever been to the place; he's probably only seen it in the movies.

"Why do all these planets look like Earth anyway?" Ford complains. "Everywhere we go the grass is green, the trees are green, the sky is blue. We could be on Earth for all we know."

Why is it that everywhere Rodney goes he's stuck with idiots? "The chlorophyll in the plants makes the leaves look green. The atmosphere scatters the blue end of the light spectrum, so that's what you see. If the atmosphere didn't have the same concentrations of elements we wouldn't be able to breathe. If the plants didn't have the chlorophyll they wouldn't be able to photosynthesize and there wouldn't be enough oxygen in the air to breathe."

"Thanks," Ford says. He sounds happy, even though Rodney made his explanation as short as he could and didn't slow down to take a breath. Maybe Ford likes the planet after all; maybe he's just bored with them all looking the same. Rodney doesn't really care.

The village green has park benches around it. Rodney sits on one of them and closes his eyes while Sheppard and Teyla make contact with the locals. He can almost imagine the sounds of distant traffic and yappy dogs being pulled along by their annoying owners. But those are things he's only seen in the movies and this is nothing like the Earth he remembers.

4. M4P-651

Rodney has his head bent over the life-signs detector as he ambles away from the Stargate. It's only when he hears Sheppard breathe "Wow" that he looks up. He blinks, wondering if his eyes have gone funny, but the look on Sheppard's face suggests he's seeing the same thing as Rodney

The grass is purple; the trees have multiple trunks and pink leaves; and the cloudless sky is white. It's the most alien landscape Rodney's ever seen. He half expects to be ambushed by little green men and carried off to be experimented on - except the life-signs detector tells him there's no one in the vicinity.

Ford once asked him why all planets looked the same. The answer had been so obvious that Rodney had been annoyed at having to spell it out. If Ford had been here now, Rodney's sure he would have asked why this planet was so different. Rodney doesn't know the answer yet and he hates to admit there's something beyond his understanding, but he still wishes Ford was here to ask the question.

"Makes a nice change," Sheppard says, breaking the moment.

Ronon and Teyla look at them, amused; they've seen it all before. As if by unspoken agreement, Sheppard and Rodney both try to act as nonchalant. But, as they start walking towards the nearest settlement, it's hard not to look at the unusual foliage.

5. Earth

They've been on Earth a week now and Rodney still isn't used to the view. Atlantis is floating in the Pacific Ocean and just outside the lab window is San Francisco. No one expects to be here very long but, while they are, they're taking the opportunity to get through all those little jobs they never seem to get around to when they're in imminent danger of attack from one race or another. Some people have gone home to visit their families and friends, but Rodney's been back on Earth recently enough and he's got more important things to do.

Except there's very little work going on. Too many of the people who've stayed in the city are spending too much of their time staring at the Golden Gate Bridge. In the end Rodney gives up trying to work and finds a balcony. Sheppard's already there, goodness knows why, but Rodney can't be bothered to go someplace else, so he leans on the railing beside him.

"It's not right," Sheppard says. "We shouldn't be here."

Rodney's been thinking the same thing all week. "I want to go home."

Sheppard nods. "We will. They can't keep us on Earth forever."

Rodney doesn't share Sheppard's optimism, but he hopes he's right. This isn't the planet he wants to live on any more.

1. Atlantis

When Rodney looks up into the sky, he can't pick out any of the constellations he's been used to seeing all his life. Even the Milky Way is no more than a bright smudge from here. The Ancients' database has names for all the stars visible from Atlantis, but he hasn't had enough time to learn many of them yet. The only one he can find without a computer is Sovegi, their pole star, at the end of the dragon's tail.

Zelenka's Czech swearing is still audible, even out on the balcony. But before Rodney goes back inside to fix whatever Zelenka has broken, he stays for a minute and listens to the lapping of the waves against one of the piers not far below him. The sound's supposed to be relaxing, according to an article he once read, long ago, before he learned not to read inaccurate pop science journals. Rodney's since decided the noise just makes him need to pee.

"Rodney." Zelenka's voice is loud enough that Rodney can tell, without turning round, that Zelenka's snuck out onto the balcony with him. "Are you coming back to work?"

"In a minute. Atlantis has been around for centuries. It'll wait a few minutes more." The whole city smells of history, the same way European castles do.

Zelenka comes up beside him and looks up at the sky. "It is a beautiful sight."

Rodney doesn't want to agree with him, because that will just encourage him. So all he says is, "It's home," before turning around and going back inside.

Now it was Daniel's bet and he'd zoned out again. Jack and Carter exchanged a glance over their cards.

"That's what, the second time he's done that?" Jack commented.

"Third," Teal'c put in.

Carter looked more worried and called Daniel's name softly, but there was no response.

"Daniel," Jack said, louder, and waved a hand in front of Daniel's face.

Daniel jumped and the creases in his face smoothed out as he focused on Jack for a moment, before looking round at the identical concerned expressions on Carter and Teal'c's faces. "Jack?"

"You zoned out again," he explained, a mixture of worry and fear in his voice. "For five minutes this time."

"Sorry." Daniel frowned, but didn't volunteer any more details of what he'd been remembering.

Jack hesitated to ask again. The last time this had happened they'd been on P2X 445 two days ago and despite Daniel looking like he'd been in pain when he'd come out of it, he'd refused to tell Jack what it had all been about, beyond it being a memory from when he was Ascended. Jack had been sure Daniel knew more than that, but he hadn't said anything, giving Daniel the chance to volunteer more information himself. When nothing had been forthcoming he'd hoped their weekly team night would help, what with being off the base and at Jack's house. Daniel had felt comfortable here once.

Teal'c broke the lengthening silence. "It is your bet, Daniel Jackson."

"Ah, right." Daniel straightened up and considered his cards. "I'll call." He added some more cash to the pile in the center of the table.

Jack was unsurprised to find that merely added to Teal'c's win and he was glad to hear the doorbell announcing the arrival of the pizza.

"I'll help you," Carter said, following him to the door. That last round had cleaned her out too and Jack wondered just how long Daniel could hold out against the might of Teal'c. Especially since Daniel had drunk over half of his beer.

Carter took the pizzas while Jack paid for them out of the money he'd been keeping back for the purpose. "What are we going to do about Daniel, sir?" she asked quietly, as the door closed.

Jack sighed. "Let him finish that bottle of beer?" he suggested, half-seriously, putting his change back in his pocket.

"I think you should talk to him."

He frowned and tried to take the pizzas from Carter, but she held on tightly to them. "Why me?" Jack had been very careful to keep his real feelings for Daniel hidden from Carter and Teal'c. If she had known what had gone on between them before Daniel Ascended, she'd never so much as hinted at it before.

"Have you seen the way he keeps looking at you?"

Even if he was sure she didn't mean in that way, his heart skipped a beat anyway. He was careful not to change his expression and Carter carried on without waiting for an answer.

"It's that same protective look you get about him sometimes. Whatever he's remembering from when he was Ascended, I'm sure it has something to do with you."

There was one thing it could be, but since it was something Jack didn't like to think about at all, he wasn't keen to discuss it with Daniel. "Then I'm the last person he should talk to." To forestall her argument, he snatched the pizzas off her and took them into the living room, where Teal'c had just won the last of Daniel's money.

Daniel smiled at the sight of the pizzas and they all dug in, while Teal'c explained just what he'd done to his Wii Fit to necessitate buying a new one with all the money he'd won tonight. Jack ignored Carter's pointed looks at him and told Teal'c he was banned from future poker games. At the rate he was going Teal'c would end up having to pay Jack's mortgage within a year.

Fortunately, Daniel suggested a game called senet, which he and Teal'c then waxed enthusiastically about for a good ten minutes. Jack established from their conversation that it was a game Teal'c had played as a child and Sha're taught to Daniel on Abydos. Apparently Daniel was sure he knew where he could get hold of a set and Jack ended up agreeing to play it at their next team night.

Jack allowed Daniel to finish his beer without comment, even though he had pointedly taken it away from him earlier in the evening. Daniel didn't even notice how warm it had gotten, which wasn't a good sign, even though he hadn't zoned out at all since they started eating.

Afterwards Teal'c suggested a game of Rock Band on the Wii he'd brought with him. Jack didn't remember who had first shown Teal'c the Wii, but he would bet anything it was now Teal'c's favorite thing about Earth. It had been a slippery slope from beating everyone at boxing and bowling, to Teal'c and Carter's arguments over who was better at Rock Band. Jack hadn't even known Carter was that musical, but that was typical Carter, being good at everything. Jack and Daniel were usually happy to just watch and not make fools of themselves. Jack knew this would be the perfect time to talk to Daniel even without the pointed looks Carter gave him as Teal'c set the game up.

Daniel sat in the corner of the couch, right where he used to sit before he Ascended. It was the first time Jack had seen him sit there since he came back and he couldn't help smiling at the sight before he settled back beside him, another beer in his hand.

Under cover of the song Teal'c and Carter were playing to, Jack turned to Daniel and, keeping his voice quiet enough not to be heard by the other two, said, "So, what is it?"

"Mm?" Daniel frowned and sounded like he was concentrating more on the game than on Jack.

"What you've been remembering," he clarified.

Daniel didn't say anything, just blinked, but Jack knew Daniel knew what he was talking about. When he still said nothing, Jack decided to up the ante a little. "You keep zoning out. I can't take someone off world who might not be concentrating when there are people are trying to kill us."

"I remembered Ba'al torturing you," Daniel said all of a sudden.

As much as Jack knew that it would help Daniel to talk about what he had been remembering, he just couldn't do it. "I've been trying not to," he said and turn his attention back to the television screen. The song came to an end with a new high score and Jack jumped up before Teal'c could click on 'Play again'. "How about a game of baseball," he suggested, and picked Wii Sports out of the pile of Teal'c's games.

"I will beat you, O'Neill."

Jack smiled at the challenge. "Don't count on it."

Carter sighed. "I'll sit this one out." She took Jack's place on the couch next to Daniel, who hadn't said anything. Jack didn't expect him to either.

Since it was Teal'c's game, Jack let him bat first. It was easier to eavesdrop on Carter and Daniel's conversation while he pitched. It wasn't that he didn't care what Daniel had gone through, it was more that he didn't want to dream about it tonight.

"Ba'al tortured Jack," Daniel said. Carter hadn't even had to ask anything.

"I know," Carter replied, almost too quietly for Jack to hear. "He spent a day in the infirmary when he got back."

Jack had spent half that day asleep and the other half trying to get Dr. Fraiser to let him out.

Teal'c scored a run and the Wii crowd went wild. Carter and Daniel said nothing and Jack wasn't sure if that was because they were used to Teal'c being good at all the Wii games or because they weren't really watching. He wasn't going to turn round to find out.

"I couldn't do anything to stop him." Daniel sounded frustrated. "The only thing I could do was to take away some of Jack's pain."

"And that's what you were remembering?"

Daniel must have nodded, because they were both quiet while Teal'c finished his turn at bat and Jack was up.

"There's something else important I'm forgetting. From before I was Ascended."

Jack completely failed to swing his bat, he was so busy listening to what Daniel might say next.

"Are you ready O'Neill?"

Jack nodded and this time he hit the ball far enough to get a double.

"I'm going to get some water," Carter said. "Playing guitar is thirsty work."

"I'll come with you," Daniel said, and Jack heard them both go off to the kitchen. Which at least meant he'd equalled Teal'c's score by the time the inning ended.

He could hear their low voices carrying over the sound of the game. He wasn't sure if he was glad or annoyed not to be able to hear the words. If they were talking about what Daniel had been remembering when he was zoning out, then Jack thought it was probably just as well they were in another room. It was in the past and he'd prefer not to know any more details now.

In the end, Teal'c did beat him. It was only because he was distracted, but he wasn't going to tell Teal'c the reason why, so he didn't offer it as an excuse.

As Teal'c packed up, Carter came back into the living room and gave him a sympathetic look. She'd been worried about him at the time, he got that, but he didn't want any of them to be reliving it now. She turned it into a smile when she noticed he was watching her.

Daniel followed her, looking happier, so that was something. Except that he frowned at the couch and stood there, unmoving, looking at the spot he'd been sitting in earlier.

"Something wrong with my couch?" Jack kept his tone jokey, wanting Daniel to relax enough to tell him what he was thinking.

"No," Daniel replied, slowly. "Just something I've forgotten."

Jack wondered if it was the same thing Daniel had mentioned to Carter earlier. He wanted to ask Daniel if he remembered anything about his feelings for Jack before he'd Ascended, but Carter and Teal'c were only in the hall and it wasn't a conversation he wanted to have with them listening. So instead he said, "If it's important, it'll come back to you."

Daniel nodded and smiled.

Jack was tempted to touch him, to help him remember, but he could wait. The moment would be so much sweeter when Daniel had all of his memories back of the time when he and Jack had been together. For now, Jack had to let him go and hope that the next time Daniel zoned out it was because of a memory from before he Ascended, rather than during.

Remus had once pointed out that mentally he'd never quite made it past sixteen when it came to sex, although Sirius thought he hadn't been that bad when Remus had updated him on current contraceptive methods so he could pass the information onto Harry. However, he could that tell the red colour of Harry's face was only based on his memories and not the humour of the situation, given that he didn't smile at all. It was one thing to laugh about the event with your contemporaries, but another to do so with your godfather. In an attempt to rescue the situation as quickly as possible once Harry had finished, Sirius pointed out, "There is more to contraception than condoms."

Harry instantly put the packet down and crossed his legs. For a moment Sirius fancied himself a bit of a teacher after all and sat up straighter on the bed. "There are potions girls can take to prevent them from getting pregnant and charms that do the same thing. Except they're not quite as reliable. So I hear." It's not as if he had any reliable evidence to back that up with, apart from Remus's say so. Not that Remus's word was unreliable, but if Harry asked him for proof of that statement, he couldn't rely on Remus's say so, what with Remus not being a girl.

"Oh, so there's nothing I have to do." Harry relaxed and breathed out a relieved sigh.

Sirius frowned. Harry was always so studious that he hadn't expected him to treat this like his father had. Although once Lily actually agreed to go out with James, he had suddenly found a pressing need to impress her with his contraceptive knowledge. "This is a serious business. What would you do if you found out you'd got a girl pregnant? Or caught an STD?"

"I know that." He squirmed anyway. "I just thought that would the the end of the Talk."

Frankly, Sirius felt the same way, but Remus had gone to so much trouble to make sure the others were out of the way - again - so he wasn't going to stop now. Besides, Remus would only ask how it went and he was rubbish at lying to Remus. So then he'd be forced to go back and finish the job and that would be even worse, despite it being his idea in the first place.

In the interests of making sure Sirius was thorough, Remus had left his visual aids in the top drawer of the bedside table. Sirius leaned back, reached over to open it and then fished around inside. When he pulled out a piece of parchment he was careful to make sure Harry didn't see the bottle filled with white liquid he and Remus had left at the front. "This charm's just as effective whoever casts it. I'd learn that one if I were you."

Harry took it from him and read it. "Can I take this away?"

Sirius nodded. He couldn't expect anyone to learn it that fast. Especially not with someone else watching what they were doing. "Of course. It's Remus's anyway, but I don't think he needs it back."

Although Harry frowned he said nothing, just rolled the parchment up and stuck it in the back pocket of his jeans.

When Sirius rummaged in the drawer again he nearly came to grief. For all he knew Harry would one day need lube, but there was no way he was going to discuss that now. He was still coming to terms with the idea of little Harry having sex at all. He managed to distract Harry from what he was hiding by laying down the two bottles on the bed between them. "These are for men to take. One's spermicide, the other prevents STDs."

Harry nodded, understanding, and picked the purple one up and studied it. "Which one's which?"

Sirius opened his mouth to answer but closed it again when he realised he wasn't sure. He looked between them but there was no brilliant flash of inspiration and he wouldn't be able to get away with calling Remus up to ask him. He was torn between guessing and telling Harry the truth, but he didn't want Harry to think he knew nothing. In the end he didn't have to make a choice because he was silent long enough for Harry to guess the reason why.

"It's alright. McGonagall told us condoms are always best because they prevent STDs and pregnancy at the same time." He smiled and Sirius wondered for a moment at Harry making him feel better. Not that it worked.

"I'm sorry, I'm a terrible godfather. These are the sort of things I should know." Even if Remus had never wanted the job Sirius wished James had given it to him anyway.

Harry shook his head and scooted closer to pat Sirius on the shoulder. "I don't mind. I mean, I'd rather you hadn't." Sirius smiled as Harry's blush reddened. "But it's the thought that counts."

At that Sirius pulled Harry into a hug. He was determined to be the best godfather anyone had ever had. Even if that meant knowing his own shortcomings. "I should still get Remus to fill you in on the bits I missed."

"That's probably a good idea," Harry agreed. "I reckon he'd be a lot less embarrassed than you were."

Sirius might have been inclined to agree had he not been able to vividly remember the events of a few days ago and how Remus's Sex Education lesson had ended.

~*~*~

Sirius has already forgotten the visual aids still laid out on the bed beside them. Potions and charms have certainly moved on since he was in Azkaban, so there's no doubt he needed Remus to catch him up on it all. He needs to understand this lot if he's going to be able to explain it all to Harry, even if not for any practical purpose. But he suspects that once upon a time, Remus had needed to know all about how to make sure not to get a girl pregnant.

He doesn't mind because Remus is here now, his head on Sirius's knee, enjoying the feel of Sirius's hands in his hair. After doing most of the talking Remus is quiet now and though that doesn't usually worry Sirius, it does make him think.

"Remus, if you're worried that I care if you-"

Remus shakes his head suddenly, Sirius's fingers bumping into his head as he does so. "I'm not."

"Because I don't." He had, for maybe a minute, before the first time they made love, that summer after they were reunited. But since then he's hated the thought of Remus being lonely all those years he thought Sirius was a traitor and never coming back.

"I know." Remus's voice is confident as he replies, but he closes his eyes and gives a happy sigh.

Sirius doesn't stop what he's doing but can't help testing. "I was gone for a long time."

"I know." This time Remus's voice is wistful and it reminds Sirius how much he missed him.

Since his other hand's been doing nothing up till now, Sirius uses it to brush his fingers along Remus's jaw and cheek. Remus turns his hand into Sirius's touch and brings his own arm up to slip his palm under Sirius's trousers to rub against his ankle and Sirius shivers at the touch. The moment threatens to turn nostalgic and they've had enough of those times, so Sirius returns to teasing. "You know, maybe if I had some practical experience with those charms..."

When he doesn't finish the sentence, Remus opens his eyes and looks up at Sirius with laughter in his eyes. Sirius loves that he knows Remus will know exactly what he's hinting at. Although given their recent discussion, it's hardly much of a change of topic. "The contraceptive ones?"

Remus knows what Sirius thinks about girls - has always thought about girls - and although he doesn't share those opinions, he never minds. "I'm quite sure those aren't necessary."

"Then again, some people prefer the old-fashioned method." Remus looks away, down the bed.

Sirius follows his gaze to where there are three discarded potion bottles: one purple, one clear, one white. He wonders where Remus gets the latter one from since he's always been embarrassed about that sort of thing when it's for himself. He frowned. "That lube..."

Remus smiles. "I may be pants at potions, but I make those fairly well."

Remus did always manage to come up with the goods when it came to exams, but that's not what Sirius is thinking of now. He knows Remus just needs a good reason and Sirius has always been an incentive. Sirius laughs and says, "I think they may need some product testing."

When he leans down it makes the angle awkward, but Remus puts an effort into the kiss that's only there when he hasn't seen Sirius for a while, and Sirius's toes curl, glad they have the house to themselves for a good while yet.

That's not the only surprise Remus has in store for him today and when he rolls his head off Sirius's knee and onto the bed he pulls Sirius down on top of him. Sirius is sort of sideways across him, but that doesn't stop Remus from kissing him fiercely and pulling Sirius's clothes all askew to rub his fingers along Sirius's skin. It's rare that Remus is so alpha male like this and Sirius likes it, so he lets him.

"I always liked you best," Remus whispers, relocating his mouth to Sirius's jaw and down his neck.

Sirius smiles because as much as he says he doesn't care - and he really doesn't - knowing that helps.

~*~*~

When the lesson started, Sirius had no idea what was in store for them. They'd all been expecting an ordinary Transfiguration lesson, but even Professor McGonagall handing out bananas gave them no clues. James had suggested what they might be changing it into, which they'd all laughed at, and Sirius had frowned at his small, straight and above all, slightly green banana. It was unlikely to be true because that was too simple for Fourth Years to be learning.

All became clear when she handed round little packets that at least some of the class recognised given from the titters the packets induced in some of the boys. The girls gave them looks that said they were above that sort of thing. Sirius was perfectly happy never to have anything to do with them. Remus, however, turned red on his cheeks and chin and, although he didn't mean it cruelly, Sirius laughed.

"Mr Black."

At McGonagall's voice Sirius's head snapped up and he was immediately silent.

"Perhaps you would like to explain these to the class instead?" McGongall stared at him, as she held up one of the still unopened packets.

Sirius shook his head, which for once McGonagall took as an answer and stepped backwards to address the whole class. "This," she explained," is the best way of preventing the spread of STDs and preventing unwanted pregnancy. Mr Black, can you name an STD for me?"

Horrified by this point, Sirius couldn't have told her his own name if she'd asked. Fortunately, Remus whispered, "Syphilis," and Sirius repeated it gratefully, not caring how Remus knew that.

"Thank you Mr Lupin." Sirius sighed - she never did miss a trick. "But you should have picked one without any 's' sounds, they always carry further when you whisper."

That explained a lot and Sirius was glad at least Padfoot and Mooney had no 's's in them. But Remus sank lower in his chair and Sirius was too busy envying Peter for being entirely 's' free to pay any attention to the names of any other STDs that lesson. It wasn't likely to be on their OWLs, so he wasn't going to worry about it.

"Now, it's very important that you put it on properly, otherwise you might as well not bother at all." McGonagall opened the packet and took out the colourless round shape inside. Sirius sat up straighter, having a sudden, horrifying, vision of what was going to be happening next. "A banana is a particularly good representation of the human penis."

There were a few giggles around the room at that, but McGonagll ignored them. Sirius looked disconsolately at his banana and then over to Remus's, which was long and bent in a nice banana-y curve. "Now watch as you carefully roll it onto the banana making sure not to stretch it too much or you'll make holes in it." She almost looked like she was caressing the banana.

"There's no way she learnt how to do that on the real thing," Peter whispered.

Sirius hoped not. Teachers having a sex life was a horrible thought.

James groaned. "I don't want to know."

"I'm never going to get that image out of my head." The whole lesson was going to be seared on his brain for life, particularly McGonagall bending over a condom-covered banana.

Once finished, she turned back to class to show off her banana. "Now it's your turn."

None of them dared move at first and Sirius, for one, was paralysed in fear. But McGonagall giving him the evil eye was enough to replace one fear with another and he tore open his packet. As he delicately put the condom on his own banana he looked of the corner of his eye at what Remus was doing and that gave him thoughts that weren't a good idea to dwell on in a public place, even if he was sat behind a desk. Worse was to come when McGonagall went round the class commenting on their technique and dispensing advice. Sirius wasn't sure he was all that pleased to receive only praise for his efforts.

After that, when Sirius thought he might die of embarrassment about the whole thing, she made it worse by going on to talk about male masturbation. In front of a class of girls and boys, if it hadn't been bad enough already. "It's a perfectly natural thing to do," she said and Sirius wondered how she could possibly know, since she'd never been a boy. Even the rumours didn't go that far.

And then, using the banana in a way that put Sirius off eating them for the rest of the term, she went on to use hers to demonstrate how it worked. Sirius didn't dare look away. It was like he was trapped, even though he didn't think for a minute his technique needed work given the number of times he practised it.

When at last, after what seemed like a week, the lesson ended she all too cheerfully said, "Throw those condoms away, they're no use now. But you can eat the bananas if you like."

None of them could leave the classroom quickly enough.

"I'm never eating a banana again," James said.

Nods and murmurs indicated everyone else agreed and Sirius thought he might be sick if he ever saw one again.

The worst of it was that after that, it completely put Sirius off wanking for a month: whenever he started he had an image of McGonagall in his mind and she was the biggest mood killer he'd ever known. It made him wonder for a while after that if it wasn't normal to do it that often after all, and the whole point of the lesson had been not to educate them about sex, but rather put them off the idea completely. If so, it had worked. Sirius made it all the way to seventeen before he cornered Remus and discovered just how good his masturbation technique was on someone else.

"I don't know. I rather think I might make something up on the spot." He gave her a wide, toothy grin.

Sarah smiled back and shook her head. By now she knew better than to take his words at face value and he was probably already thinking about what he needed to say to the Raagdal Tribe, who lived on the other side of the lake. But he liked to make people think he was more brilliant than he was and could talk his way through a delicate negotiation with no preparation.

They had been on their way to Scotland to answer the Brigadier's call and had somehow accidentally landed here. The aliens they'd come across had a morbid fear of something they called Cyclaus that the tribe who lived on the other side of the lake had set on them. Upon questioning it turned out none of them had ever actually seen it, whatever it was. However, it had meant no contact with the other tribe that shared this land and they were suffering from the lack of one particular nutrient in their food. Which was only found on the other side of the lake, of course.

The boat had come from the TARDIS, although goodness knows what the Doctor was doing with it in there. He sat down at one end and pulled his hat down over his eyes, thereby confirming Sarah's suspicions. Harry stood easily in the boat and she was only too happy to take his outstretched hand. Since she couldn't swim she wasn't entirely sure about there only being a small amount of wood between her and a lake of indeterminate depth.

The Doctor didn't appear to be paying any attention, so she said, "I'll help row."

Harry shook his head and only let go of her hand once she was seated at the other end of the boat from the Doctor. "I used to row at university," he said. "I'm quite looking forward to getting some practise in."

As she didn't know how to row, she couldn't really complain about that. Besides, Harry was off already and she wasn't at all sure it was a good idea to try and grab an oar from him. It was quite nice, she had to admit, to watch him work. She wondered what else he did to keep fit because those muscles couldn't have come from nowhere.

The trip across the lake was pleasant, if silent, until they neared the shore and Sarah could see the aliens on the other side. They also had four arms, and the only thing she could see that was different about these ones was that they lived on the opposite side of the lake from the tribe they'd landed among. It didn't surprise her, though. She rather suspected it was the usual case of a misunderstanding that would be easily cleared up. Assuming the Doctor didn't annoy them, of course. "I can see them," she said, softly, in case her voice carried.

The Doctor twisted round to look. "Aha!" Now she really was sure he'd been considering what to say, because he stood up, which rocked the boat more than Harry's rowing had. Sarah grabbed onto the side and Harry gave her a reassuring smile, although she didn't feel any more relaxed about it. The Doctor never got a word out because as soon as he spread his arms for a grand beginning something that looked distinctly like a giant frog made a sudden appearance in the water next to them.

Shocked, Sarah screamed. Harry jumped, lost an oar and grabbed her arm. The upshot of which was the Doctor losing his footing. In response, the boat rocked from one side to the other and the next thing Sarah knew she was trying to breathe in lake water. Fortunately, Harry was still holding onto her and blindly, she grabbed at him. As soon as she had, her head was above water once again and she breathed in big gulps of air.

"All right, Sarah?" he asked, but he was looking around him, not at her.

"I can't swim." She felt slightly safer now she had a firm grip on something, but still just as scared of drowning.

"Right, then." He twisted round in her grip and they ended up so her back was to his. "Keep still and I'll have you out of here in a jiffy."

She nodded and then Harry had her on her back, with him pulling her along. She concentrated on the sky and clouds overhead, which were the same shades of blue and white that were found on Earth. Although usually it was the sky that was blue and the clouds white. "I really must learn to swim," she said to him, mostly just for something to say. He just grunted in response and she kept quiet after that, guessing he was probably working hard.

When his grip on her changed she almost panicked, but he said, "You should be able to stand up now."

She didn't let go of him until her feet found the ground and then the water was up to her chest. Her nerves were still shot away, though, and she only let go of him reluctantly.

"Get out of the water before you freeze," he said. "I'm going back for the Doctor."

"What?"

Harry was already swimming back to where the boat bobbed along on the lake before he could answer her question. The Doctor was nowhere to be seen. Sarah had just assumed he'd swum for the side while Harry was helping her. Surely he'd have learnt to swim at some point in his lives?

She stayed where she was, worrying, and frustrated at not being able to do anything to help as she watched Harry dive under the water. His black socks were the last thing of him she saw and she held her breath waiting for him to come up again.

It was only when she was beginning to need to breathe out that at last she saw him again, and with the Doctor, she was relieved to see. Only now did she start wading out of the water and by the time Harry was back with the Doctor she was sitting shivering on the bank. The aliens had disappeared. She hadn't seen them go and she wondered if the appearance of the giant frog had something to do with it.

From here she could see the Doctor was unconscious, so she rushed back into the lake to help Harry pull him out. Once the Doctor was lying on his back on the bank, Harry bent over him and Sarah noticed he wasn't breathing. Although it was hard to tell with the Doctor: he didn't have a respiratory system quite like everyone else. It was enough to prompt Harry into action, though, because he started on what Sarah recognised as CPR, even if she didn't know enough to do it herself.

As she watched, she had one hand to her mouth, not noticing the smell of her wet sleeve and willing the Doctor to just hurry up and breathe. If he wasn't breathing and his hearts weren't beating then he was technically dead, wasn't he? They needed him to negotiate with these aliens and to get them home: she didn't have enough confidence to work the TARDIS without something going wrong. But more than that he was her friend and she didn't know what she'd do if he died. It was hard to swallow past the lump in her throat just considering it. So she tried to stop thinking and instead counted along with Harry as he pressed on the Doctor's chest.

Then, all of a sudden, just as Harry was giving the Doctor his two breaths, the Doctor drew in one of his own. Harry quickly turned him on his side and he coughed lake water onto the ground. He had barely stopped when he said, "Why, Harry, I never knew you felt that way for me," with a big grin on his face as if nothing had happened at all.

"Oh, Doctor." Sarah rushed forward from where she'd been sat to take hold of the Doctor's hand and reassure herself he was still there. "We weren't sure you were going to make it."

"Hello, Sarah Jane," he replied, then blinked. "Me, die? That would be an altogether too frivolous thing to do. Why, I've barely lived. I'm still on my first millennium, you know."

Sarah laughed tightly, relieved but not really amused by his remark.

The Doctor was already sitting up and looking round. "Well, we're on the right side of the lake, at least. Let's go and find the Raagdal Tribe, and then on to Scotland and the Brigadier!"

"You should take it easy," Harry said, nevertheless helping the Doctor up. "That was a nasty crack on your head, I don't mind telling you."

Now it made sense. The Doctor must have hit his head on the boat as it went over and they fell in the lake.

The Doctor waved a hand, gathered up his scarf and started walking, wringing it out as he went.

"He will be all right, won't he?" Sarah asked Harry as she took his hand up.

Harry looked towards where the Doctor was striding away and sighed. "Nothing wrong with the old chap."

However, he wasn't quite concentrating on what he was doing and instead of helping her up, she brought him down on top of her.

"Sorry, old girl," he said, moving away quickly and not catching her eye.

"Harry." She caught at his arm. "Why don't you wait here? You deserve a rest."

He looked toward the Doctor again, but by this time he was already disappearing into the distance. Although they could still hear his booming voice calling out to the Raagdal Tribe. "Jolly good idea," Harry said, settling down.

Sarah shifted over next to him, not quite up for a run just yet, and she was worried about Harry now. Her hair was still dripping everywhere and she started wringing it out.

Harry took off his blazer and made a face at it. "You should have said you couldn't swim. We'd have left you on the other side of the lake."

"Because you would have left me on the other side of the lake." Which was a pretty good reason, she thought. "But if I hadn't been there the Doctor wouldn't have almost died." She bit her lip.

He shook his head. "I don't think a few minutes would have made any difference. Maybe if he'd been a human." He shrugged. "No harm done anyway."

"What are you two doing sitting around?"

Startled, Sarah jumped up. "Done already, Doctor?" she asked, incredulously.

He grinned. "And I have a new boat. Goes with the TARDIS nicely, don't you think?"

The aliens were carrying a boat that was a little bigger than the one that now bobbed along in the middle of the lake. This one was blue.

She rolled her eyes. "Let's go home."

"It's been quite enough excitement for one day," Harry agreed.

On the way back, with a few of the aliens in the boat with them, Harry let her take one oar. Although given the way he pressed close to her, Sarah suspected it was mainly because he was afraid he'd have to rescue her again. She certainly had no intention of giving him the chance. Besides, she was shivering now it was all over and the adrenalin had worn off. She didn't fancy another dip, except in a hot bath.

"What did you say to them?" she asked the Doctor to take her mind off it. She couldn't think what he could have said to make them agree that fast.

"Well, it turns out that our friends here are just as scared of the Giant Frog as you are."

Sarah glared at him but he carried on regardless.

"Apparently, it's an ill omen and unless they meet with the other tribe they'll all die." He leaned closer and lowered his voice. "Although they also needed a nutrient that's only found on the other side of the lake so it was all quite amicable really."

She sighed. "At least the frog was good for something other than nearly getting us all killed." She would have preferred an ordinary diplomatic solution with no lives in danger, though.

"If you're going to help row, old girl, I'd really rather prefer it if you did your bit."

While the Doctor was talking she had got distracted and forgotten what she was supposed to be doing. "Oh, sorry." The rowing itself was not getting any easier, though, and her arms grew more tired with every stroke. Not that she was going to tell Harry that. But by the time they were safely back on dry land she was yawning.

"I think we all need a rest before we get to Scotland," Harry suggested.

"What's that?" The Doctor turned from offering jelly babies to various aliens. "Oh, you go ahead. I'll just stay and chat with these lovely chaps here."

Sarah smiled and shook her head. Sometimes the Doctor could just be so incorrigible, but she wouldn't want him any other way. She took the arm Harry offered her, although his sleeve was just as wet as hers. "You were quite the hero today, rescuing both of us."

He ducked his head, but she could see he'd gone red.

Although she meant it, she didn't say anything more on the topic. Except, when they stopped to open the TARDIS door, and Harry held it for her, she reached up and kissed him on the cheek.

Note: Cyclorana australis is commonly called the Northern Snapping Frog or Giant Frog

However, the place had taken a little getting used to: with its bright colors it looked like something his five year old nephew would paint. It hadn't seemed quite real to him at first, and then the clash of the bright green grass and the purple earth beneath made him feel ill. It was only now that they were headed back that he realized it had stopped bothering him, and he found he had forgotten what the countryside back on Earth looked like. Although perhaps that could be due to living in a city in the middle of an ocean for the past year.

The first he'd heard of this mission to escort Dr Weir during her negotiations with the Teurians was at the official briefing she'd given them that morning. Which had been followed by an unofficial briefing from Colonel Sheppard. Callahan was not going to admit it, but he had gotten lost during Dr Weir's briefing as to the specifics of what she hoped to accomplish. Since he was just the grunt it didn't matter too much. And he'd had no trouble understanding the Colonel's aims: make sure Dr Weir came back alive.

~*~*~

"Elizabeth doesn't have any combat experience, remember that," Sheppard said, looking closely at each of them in turn.

Major Dean straightened his shoulders and answered for them. "Don't worry, sir. I'm sure we can keep an eye on her between us." They were marines, after all, and that was what they were trained to do.

Sheppard brushed his fingers along his handgun. "Maybe you should take Ronon with you?"

"If you think that's necessary, sir." Dean's answer was diplomatic enough, but he scowled as he said it.

It was obvious that Sheppard didn't trust them. Which was unfair, because they'd only had that one screw-up, and that was months ago. Besides, no one actually died. Well, they were alive now, at least.

Anyway, they'd been on plenty of missions on their own without needing any help from an outsider. Especially from someone who might've demonstrated his ability to take any of the marines out in unarmed combat with one hand behind his back, but where it was impossible to tell whose side he was really on. Though Callahan certainly wouldn't want to find Ronon as his enemy.

Sheppard coughed and took his hand away from his gun. "Well, I'm sure you'll be fine without him." He didn't look convinced, though. "I think he has plans anyway."

After Sheppard let them go, Callahan wondered why he had bothered with the briefing at all. Only last week they'd accompanied some scientists off world just fine. Some of the doctors had been edgier than others, but no one had suggested their team couldn't handle the mission on their own.

One of them, a cute red-head called Maria Bennett, had constantly speculated about the relationship between Sheppard and Weir. Maria apparently knew it all, but he'd dismissed her tales as idle gossip. She'd even gone on about it when they'd had dinner together, although he'd quickly found far better things to talk about with her.

He'd put the whole thing out of his mind - until now. He was reminded of it as they waited for the Gate to dial. Sheppard was leaning over the balcony, the fingers of one hand drumming against his 9mm and he only stilled when Dr Weir looked up at him. From behind her, Callahan couldn't tell exactly what she said or did. When she turned back to face the gate, he took to drumming his fingers on the rail instead.

Now, Callahan wondered if there wasn't some truth to the rumors after all. He could ask Maria tonight. As he stepped through the gate with Dr Weir and the rest of his team, he smiled in anticipation of their date.

~*~*~

Following Sheppard's directive seemed simple enough, since all they did was sit around while Dr Weir negotiated - whatever that involved. Callahan didn't know, because they weren't allowed in. Turned out Teurian women made the decisions, and the men weren't allowed in on the deliberations. Dean had been unhappy about it at first, but Dr Weir reassured him she would be all right on her own. In the end, Dean made the rest of the team give their word not to volunteer information about this particular aspect of the mission to Sheppard. Callahan had no intention of telling the Colonel - explaining to the CO why you hadn't obeyed his orders to the letter never ended well. His future plans certainly didn't include demotion.

The only other excitement the whole time had been when Lieutenant Guthrie managed to accidentally annoy the locals. All he'd done was pick a flower, but the abrupt silence had immediately told them it'd been a bad idea.

Major Dean had managed to clear up the misunderstanding without having to interrupt the negotiations. But only by promising them all sorts of other plants from Earth, some of which Callahan was not even sure they had on Atlantis. It seemed to keep the Teurians happy enough, though, and Dr Weir could shout at them later.

Afterwards, on their way back to the Gate, the mood was easy-going, helped in part by Dr Weir telling them the negotiations had gone well. Guthrie even turned to walk backwards and joke with her.

"So, they've agreed to trade for shoes?"

Dean rolled his eyes, but Dr Weir saw the funny side. "The Teurian women take their shoes very seriously." She put her hands in her pockets. "In fact, the Teurian leader particularly admired yours, Lieutenant."

Guthrie's eyes flicked down briefly to study his sensible boots, before he turned back, suitably beaten. They were still laughing when they approached the Gate and Dean told Callahan to dial Atlantis.

He'd only managed the first chevron when Stubbs shouted, "Ambush!"

In the blink of an eye, Callahan had his P90 out and pointed at the enemy: Teurian warriors. Armed with only knives, but still dangerous. And so many. Always more to replace those that fell. It was impossible to tell how many more were lurking in the long grass. They seemed to spring up out of nowhere, their clothes - the same green with purple splotches as the landscape - camouflaging them much better than the Atlantean team. Bullets rained from their P90s but their ammo would soon run out. They had not been prepared for a battle like this.

One of the Teurians got past Callahan's guard while he was trying to aim in too many directions at once. He squeezed off a killing shot at the last minute, but the Teurian stuck his knife in Callahan's leg as he went down. Callahan had to grit his teeth to keep from crying out while he struggled to stay on his feet.

"What the hell?" Dr Weir's voice came from the other side of the DHD. Glancing sideways, Callahan saw her crouched beside it. She was low enough to protect most of her, but high enough she could still see what was going on. As he focused on her, he saw a Teurian racing towards her. Callahan turned and shot past her to take him out. Dr Weir dropped to the floor, her hands over her head.

"Stay down, ma'am," Callahan shouted back, over the noise. The Teurians screamed louder than the rattle of their P90s.

No time to look round to see if she was doing as she was told because, out of the corner of his eye, he saw Dean go down quite spectacularly, his guts spilling out of his stomach. His body hit the ground with a thud, making Callahan wince.

"Man down!" That was Stubbs. Dr Weir scrambled across the grass to the Major, fell to her knees and pressed her hands to his wound. Callahan expected she knew as well as he did it wouldn't make any difference, but it was hard to stand idly by and watch your colleagues die.

The red blood mingled with the bright green of the grass and Callahan could see it was not just Dean's. No way to win this; they had to get out of here. He shouted to Guthrie to cover him and turned to dial home.

He slapped his hand down on the DHD but only got as far as the second chevron. A sudden, sharp pain in his back forced him to his knees. He gripped the DHD, and his knuckles went white as he struggled to hold himself up. He wondered where Guthrie was but didn't have the strength to call out to him. Looking further down, he felt sick at the point of a knife sticking out of his stomach.

He wished the Teurians would leave him be, but could feel his skin crawl as he heard more massing behind him. Grunting with the effort, he lifted himself to his feet. One hand still gripping the DHD, he dialed with the other. There were cold knives against his skin, slashing through his clothes. The blood that dripped down his legs was warm and wet.

It felt like an eternity, but finally he punched the center crystal. Distantly, he heard the gate whoosh open. Job done, he let go and dropped to the floor. Rolling onto his side meant narrowly escaping a killing blow. His hand grasped his 9mm; the Teurian never saw him coming. He had to roll again to avoid being crushed when the Teurian fell.

He tried to take a deep breath, but the pain made him cough. The blood from his mouth added to the pool on the ground. But there was no time to stop. Looking up, he saw another Teurian standing over Dr Weir. He no longer had the breath to shout.

Stubbs was there, but three others were quickly onto him for his troubles. Dr Weir was too busy vomiting on her shoes to notice.

Callahan turned to Guthrie - his last hope. But he wasn't doing so well. As Callahan watched, the blood that spurted out slowed and stopped.

Callahan shut his eyes, his ears ringing in the sudden quiet. How could the Teurians possibly justify this?

He knew it was up to him. With a super-human effort he didn't even know he had in him, he rose to his feet. He stumbled over the bodies that littered the ground as he made his way to Dr Weir. She didn't protest as he scooped her up. The Gate was only a few steps away, but each step was a struggle. A cry behind him was repeated by the crowd of Teurians still alive. He shivered at the sound as he flung Dr Weir through the Gate and dived through not far behind her.

He got a brief glimpse of Atlantis - home - and Colonel Sheppard running towards them, before everything went black.

She was feeling much more enthusiastic about facing the day, having had the chance to spend an hour waking up and then pampering herself, rather than the usual rushed leap out of bed and into clean clothes. Knowing in advance that her usual 9 o'clock meeting was unlikely to be too onerous she had brought her breakfast with her. She turned up to find her department heads had the same idea and they all had matching cups of coffee and bowls of something that mostly resembled oatmeal. Even if it did not quite taste like it, it was all least nutritious and kept her full until lunch time.

After that she had been prepared to take Rodney's gripes with a smile but unusually, he did not have any. Probably because he finally had some time to do all the things he had been telling her for weeks he never got the chance to get to. The meeting had still taken just over an hour, however, but today it was because they had spent half of that time joking with each other, rather than trying to solve the latest crisis, as was more usual. It was not the first time this had happened but it had become rare enough that she was struggling to remember how long ago it had been. It had reminded her of the meetings they used to have in Antarctica when they were not under so many time pressures. She wished more of the ones they had here were like that.

In fairly high spirits after the meeting, and feeling cheered by the current turn of events (or lack of them), she intended to spend her morning working through a pile of paperwork that she had been meaning to do for days and was now becoming quite urgent. First, though, she checked to see if there was anything more important she needed to deal with. She was surprised to find an e-mail from General O'Neill had just arrived, for he didn't write often.

From: j.oneill@airforce.gov
To: e.weir@atlantis.gov
CC: j.sheppard@atlantis.gov
Date: Tues, May 2, 2006 10:18 AM
Subject: You tortured Kavanagh?!

Are you insane?

At least you didn't record it.

(Is this Ronon guy as impressive as he sounds?)

Jack

This information is classified. Distribution to anyone without the proper security clearance carries consequences including and not limited to the following; fines up to $30, 000 or the equivalent; up to ten (10) years in federal prison; revocation of security clearance; revocation of citizenship or resident alien status; and/or deportment.

attachments: akavanagh1.jpg, akavanagh2.jpg

It only took her a couple of minutes to read through the attachments and establish that Kavanagh had complained about her, unsurprisingly. She could not blame him. Even though Ronon had not touched him the threat was certainly there and even if he had been guilty it was still completely unjustified. They were supposed to be the good guys and that meant they did not torture people, even if it might mean the safety of the city. The only bright spot was that he had certainly complained before and probably on more than one occasion. With any luck he had cried wolf too many times and Jack would just ignore him.

That did not make it right, though, and was something she had been unable to justify to herself on the nights she had spent tossing and turning, trying to make sense of it all. Most of the time other events conspired to put it out of her mind, but eventually she had managed to reconcile herself to the fact that she could not change the past and she needed to be consider her options more carefully in future. She really did not need this bringing up again, even though she had felt guilty for escaping justice for it. In the cold light of day she wondered if she had been insane, or just desperate. She replied quickly, wanted to know Jack's perspective, even if he did not have all the facts yet.

From: e.weir@atlantis.gov
To: j.oneill@airforce.gov
CC: j.sheppard@atlantis.gov
Date: Tues, May 2, 2006 10:22 AM
Subject: Re: You tortured Kavanagh?!

Don't remind me.

Are we in trouble?

Elizabeth

This information is classified. Distribution to anyone without the proper security clearance carries consequences including and not limited to the following; fines up to $30, 000 or the equivalent; up to ten (10) years in federal prison; revocation of security clearance; revocation of citizenship or resident alien status; and/or deportment.

She tried to turn back to her paperwork, knowing it could take Jack a while to respond, depending on how busy he was, but she could not concentrate any more. She found herself looking round the room and staring for a while at the activity outside her office. Most of the technicians working there had turned round in their chairs to chat and were currently laughing. If she went out there they might stop and she did not want to spoil their fun. Even if they did not and they let her into the joke she was not really in the mood for it.

She could not argue that she did not know what she had asked Ronon to do because she knew what he was capable of and she had seen the after effects of torture on more than one occasion. It had not been pleasant. She had tried, in the past, to convince people it was not the answer to their problems and now she had expected it to solve theirs, when an evacuation would have saved lives, if not the Stargate and the way home.

If she was in trouble then there was no doubt in her mind that she would be asked to step down. She wondered if she should anyway. It was rapidly becoming obvious, in the face of first the Wraith threat and now the one from The Trust, that Atlantis needed a leader who would endorse more aggressive solutions to what were fast becoming military problems. It did not need one whose main focus was on finding allies. She almost wished for a crisis to break up the quiet day and take her mind off things.

Rubbing her temples it was clear that she was not going to get any work done with this hanging over her. And sitting at the computer, staring at her inbox was not going to get Jack to reply any faster. She wished they were not so far away so she could see him in person to explain it to him properly. Before her thoughts could depress her any more than they already were, she decided to go for a walk.

She did not have any particular destination in mind and just wandered through the corridors. She passed people as she went, some of whom were taking the opportunity to catch up on non-urgent tasks, and others were pursuing more social activities. She returned their smiled greetings and tried to remind herself that with the exception of Kavanagh, who was no longer in Atlantis anyway, they were all happy with her work. But if they had known what she had done would they still feel the same? If she left she would miss not only Atlantis but also all these people that had become her friends.

Thinking that exercise might help she turned towards the gym. She had only just got out of the transporter when she heard grunts, clashes and sounds of flesh meeting floor, and her heart sped up in slightly horrified anticipation, in case she had got her wish. Walking gingerly round the corner she found the door was open and practice was in full swing. She took a deep calming breath and peered in.

One of the new young marines was just pushing himself up from the mat on the floor and he touched foreheads with Teyla before grinning and returning to a line of men and women along the side of the room. Some jostling went on, no doubt he was getting ribbed about being beaten by a girl. Elizabeth smiled. No one who had been here for longer than a few days thought about going up against Teyla hand-to-hand and winning, no matter how much training they'd had. Real life combat was obviously a far better learning tool, as much as Elizabeth wished none of them had to go through that.

While she was distracted by the marines, Ronon had stepped up. Although Teyla held a stick in each hand, Ronon had no weapons and Elizabeth thought that must be an unfair fight. As she watched she discovered she had forgotten how good Ronon was; how good he'd had to be to survive. It still amazed her - she was not sure if any of her people would have lived so long if they had been in the same situation.

She had intended to watch the fight but her eye could not help but be drawn to Ronon. As he dodged and parried Teyla's sticks he made it look easy, although Elizabeth knew it was actually an instinct he would not soon lose. He had obviously not been idle while Teyla fought because there was already a layer of sweat coating his skin and he could not be working that hard yet. His muscles tensed and relaxed as he attacked Teyla and blocked her attacks in return. Elizabeth smiled as she remembered the workout she and Ronon had gotten two nights ago. Now it seemed like it was too long ago.

She allowed herself to get caught up in her memories, which eased her mood a little. But by doing so she was not concentrating on what was happening around her and missed Teyla taking Ronon down. Ronon seemed good-natured about it, though, and was laughing as he allowed Teyla to help him up. Elizabeth had to give herself a mental shake to pull her thoughts back into ones that were acceptable for company and more related to current events.

The class was dismissed and Elizabeth nodded back to the marines filing out as she stepped in.

"Doctor Weir," Teyla greeted her, as she left Ronon to tidy. "Is everything all right? Or are you interested in learning how to fight?"

"I already know," Elizabeth replied. She refused to elaborate, though. Ronon was not looking in their direction, on purpose Elizabeth thought, although she could not think why.

"Then was there something specific you wanted?"

"No, I think I just got so used to lurching from one crisis to another that I'm not sure I remember how to do nothing any more."

Teyla smiled. "I understand. But there is always something."

Having finished, Ronon interrupted their conversation to inform them, "McKay tells me there is something called 'second breakfast'," which was his way of saying goodbye.

Elizabeth smiled at his enthusiasm. Somehow Ronon always managed to lift her spirits, without even seeming to try. She wished she could find an excuse to join him but since she wanted something from him other than food she thought she had better not. She did not want to embarrass herself in front of whoever might be in the mess hall.

The rest of the gym done, Teyla had collected up her sticks to return them to the back in the window and Elizabeth rethought her exercise idea. She really needed some perspective from someone else. And to not have to pretend any more that everything was all right. Watching the Athosian she found herself twining her hands together in nervousness. Berating herself, she smoothed them against her pant legs.

"Teyla," she began, although she was not really sure where to start, "you heard I nearly had an innocent man tortured?"

Teyla had sat herself down as Elizabeth spoke, and waited until Elizabeth had seated herself in the window beside her before she answered. "I did. I am told it was necessary to save Atlantis."

Elizabeth wanted to get up and pace but settled for clasping her hands together tightly in her lap and not moving them. She shook her head. "It shouldn't have been. It should never be."

"I agree, Doctor Weir, but sometimes we have to do things we would rather not to protect our people."

Elizabeth wondered, for a moment, what Teyla might have had to do. But then Teyla had lived under fear of the Wraith all her life.

"You have a valid point, Teyla, but this man was innocent. I mean, suspicious, but innocent. And perhaps I did it because..." Teyla cocked her head and Elizabeth took a deep breath before continuing, not entirely wanting to admit what Kavanagh had suspected, "...because I didn't like him. Because I wanted it to be him. I let my emotions get the best of me and made a bad call because of it."

Teyla laid one hand on Elizabeth's arm. "You felt, and I believe still feel as if you let your emotions get in your way."

Elizabeth sighed in remorse and nodded. "Yes, on both accounts." In that accusation, Kavanagh was probably right but that was how she was, she did not know any other way to be.

"If you are asking for my opinion then I do not see anything wrong with that," Teyla said with a comforting smile.

She shook her head. "If I had been thinking rationally then perhaps we could have discovered who was responsible before it became critical and the situation wouldn't have arisen."

"You cannot put all the blame on yourself. If we felt you were wrong then we would tell you. You know we would not allow you to jeopardise Atlantis. Yes you may have made a bad lapse in judgement, but that in no means implies that you are a bad leader. You are after all still human, and still capable of making mistakes, leader of this base or not. "

She smiled at Teyla. "You're right." None of these people restrained themselves from giving their opinion when they disagreed with her or each other. "Perhaps it was justified but that still doesn't make it right."

"That is something I believe that only you can decide for yourself."

Elizabeth nodded. "Since coming here I've been finding I often have to change my opinions on what is right and what is not. My views and beliefs are constantly changing in front of my eyes and sometimes it's all just a little too much to take."

"Perhaps there is something about Atlantis that makes you think this way."

"Perhaps there is." With a smile she rose, feeling at least a little more cheered, even if she could not recapture her mood of an hour earlier. "Thank you for your advice, Teyla. I will try and take it."

She had only taken a few steps when Teyla called her back. Elizabeth turned in the doorway. "If there is ever anything else that you would wish a second opinion on, I am happy to advise you once more."

"Thank you, Teyla, that's a great comfort. I will keep you to your word."

A slight inclination of Teyla’s head was her reply and she left Teyla in her own devices.

Elizabeth returned to her office via the mess, pretending to herself that she was not disappointed that Ronon was no longer there. She got herself some more coffee, though, and stopped to watch the waves, trying not to think too much. The anticipation of a reply from Jack almost made her want to go back to her office and check her e-mail right that minute. Except that if it was bad news she did not want know. Good news and maybe she could put it behind her once more and chalk it up to experience.

She did not rush back up to her office, therefore, but was surprised when she arrived to find Ronon sitting at her desk, his back to the door.

"Hello. How was second breakfast?"

Ronon turned round to look up at her. "McKay was not exaggerating."

Like many of her conversations with Ronon she was not entirely sure how to respond, except with a smile and a small shake of her head. "That's good to hear." She moved round to her desk to sit at it and found Ronon was just finishing setting up a chessboard on it.

"You have e-mail," he informed her.

"Thank you," she said, sitting down and clicking off the standard SGC screensaver she had never quite got round to changing. Her heart sped up as she saw one was from Jack. She opened it straight away, wanting to at least put herself out of her misery.

From: j.oneill@airforce.gov
To: e.weir@atlantis.gov
CC: j.sheppard@atlantis.gov
Date: Tues, May 2, 2006 11:09 AM
Subject: Re: Re: You tortured Kavanagh?!

No, we've got bigger things to worry about. Like, say, aliens? Besides, it's he-said-she-said stuff, it's like trying to prosecute date rape cases.

If it were up to me, you three would be getting commendations.

Jack

This information is classified. Distribution to anyone without the proper security clearance carries consequences including and not limited to the following; fines up to $30, 000 or the equivalent; up to ten (10) years in federal prison; revocation of security clearance; revocation of citizenship or resident alien status; and/or deportment.

Upon reading it she closed her eyes, slumped back in her chair and breathed a sigh of relief. Her worrying suddenly seemed so silly.

"Everything okay?" Ronon asked her.

She smiled at him. "Yes, nothing to worry yourself over. I take it you would like a game?"

"Yes," he replied, pushing the board away from him, the white pieces towards her.

She sat up, moved her computer out of the way and advanced a pawn. Every time she thought she had Ronon figured out it always turned out there was more to him than met the eye. She could not quite remember how the conversation had started now but after discussing strategy in chess it turned out he wanted to find out more about it.

He had understood the goal of protecting the king while attacking the opposition's well enough but she had expected him to have had more trouble with the notion of the queen being the most powerful piece on the board. As it happened he had smiled and given her a look that she thought might have melted plastic. It was one of the few times when she had known exactly what he was thinking. After an initial shock she found that not only did she not mind but she reciprocated.

So, it had started with chess. Despite Ronon being a man of action and instinct he had picked the game up quickly. She supposed it was not that different from having to plan your life when it consisted of considering the next planet to go to avoid the Wraith. He was a willing pupil and she enjoyed teaching him. Their games always went quickly, though, as he never liked to spend too much time thinking, and if she did, or tried to, he would generally find a way of making sure she did not. Sometimes she did it on purpose and then the game would not end at all.

He had not completely mastered a poker face, not that it was entirely necessary for chess. But as he moved a knight he looked up and gave her what was definitely an evil grin, forcing her to concentrate on the board, to try and discover what she had missed. She could not find anything, though, which either meant he was better than she thought at chess or better than she thought at bluffing.

She peered up at him through her eyelashes. "You're getting good at this."

He slouched back in his chair, folded his arms across his chest and grinned at her. "I suggest the rock."

"Rook," she corrected automatically, even though he had long since refused to call it that. She had surprised herself by finding it endearing rather than annoying. Ronon reached an arm out to pick his king up and immediately put it back down again. She could not decide whether he was doing it on purpose to distract her.

"Okay," she said, giving in, "you got me. Why would I move my rook?"

"Then my queen can put you in check."

She glanced up at Ronon, who looked gazed back at her. She could not help but laugh in response, which felt good in comparison to the stress of the rest of the morning. She was still smiling when she spotted an opening, moved her rook as he suggested and looked back at Ronon to make his move.

He frowned at her and studied the board. "What did you do that for?"

She grinned at him. He had never won a game against her yet and refused to let her help him or go easy on him. So, although her move looked like it would benefit him, he would know that he had missed something. She thought that perhaps if he could just sit still long enough to consider all the possible ramifications of his moves then he would do much better.

He only thought for a couple of minutes before moving a bishop.

"Are you sure you want to do that?" she asked him, but at least he had realised why his suggested move was a bad idea.

"Yes," was his immediate answer, although he looked carefully at the board again.

Successfully knighting a pawn in exchange for one sacrificed earlier in the game put his king in check with only one way out. Anyone else might have given up at this point but not Ronon. There was something to be said for his determination: he always played to the bitter end. Given that he had nearly scored a draw on one occasion, she could not blame him.

"So, how's your morning been?" she asked him, now that the pressure was off her at least.

"Good."

Sometimes it was hard chatting with Ronon because he did not give anything away. But then it was not his sparkling conversational skills she liked about him.

"Any plans for this afternoon?" she asked, lightly.

"Sheppard said something about 'paperwork'."

Elizabeth smiled despite her disappointment. She was willing to bet that Sateda had not been as bureaucratic as Earth - or America, at least - and she did not envy him his afternoon.

"But I am free this lunch time," Ronon said as he moved his king to what would have been an excellent defense had he noticed her rook hiding on the other side of the board.

Moving it up, she grinned at him. "Checkmate."

Ronon gave a grunt and tipped his king over. "One day I will beat you."

"I'm looking forward to it." Not just because she liked spending time with him, but also because their chess games had a tendency to be a prelude for something else entirely. "Is there something good for lunch?"

"There is," he replied looking straight at her.

For a minute she was not entirely sure because Ronon never missed a meal. Then she remembered his second breakfast and gave him a slightly shy smile. "My quarters. One hour." Ronon's conversational skills must be rubbing off on her.

He gave her a smile back and left her with only one hour to spend with a pile of paperwork that she swore had grown larger since she'd been gone. Not to mention an e-mail to reply to.

Before she did, she read through the rest of the e-mails that seemed to have accumulated, even on a quiet morning. There was only one other on the same subject, from Teyla this time. When Elizabeth read it she discovered John must have e-mailed his team about Kavanagh, which suggested he might have been at his computer working. John did not really do sitting down and working quietly very well, so it seemed unlikely, but then she could not really blame him given what she had spent her morning doing.

From: telya@atlantis.gov
To: j.sheppard@atlantis.gov, e.weir@atlantis.gov, ronon@atlantis.gov
Date: Tues, May 2, 2006 11:31 AM
Subject: Re: Fwd: You tortured Kavanagh?!

My apologies for not replying earlier. I am still unused to this technology.

I am glad that none of you are in danger any longer.

Teyla Emmagen

This information is classified. Distribution to anyone without the proper security clearance carries consequences including and not limited to the following; fines up to $30, 000 or the equivalent; up to ten (10) years in federal prison; revocation of security clearance; revocation of citizenship or resident alien status; and/or deportment.

The rest of her inbox confirmed that other people had taken the time to catch up too. It was hard to concentrate, with an entire hour to fill up but she simply had to get some work done while there was such a good opportunity. Her reply to Jack was not exactly a difficult one though. If he had been there in person she could have kissed him when she saw his last e-mail.

From: e.weir@atlantis.gov
To: j.oneill@airforce.gov
Date: Tues, May 2, 2006 11:58 AM
Subject: We all owe you one.

Thanks.

Elizabeth

This information is classified. Distribution to anyone without the proper security clearance carries consequences including and not limited to the following; fines up to $30, 000 or the equivalent; up to ten (10) years in federal prison; revocation of security clearance; revocation of citizenship or resident alien status; and/or deportment.

She hit send and with a mischievous smile, wrote an addendum.

From: e.weir@atlantis.gov
To: j.oneill@airforce.gov
Date: Tues, May 2, 2006 11:59 AM
Subject: Ronon

And he's better. In every way.

Elizabeth

This information is classified. Distribution to anyone without the proper security clearance carries consequences including and not limited to the following; fines up to $30, 000 or the equivalent; up to ten (10) years in federal prison; revocation of security clearance; revocation of citizenship or resident alien status; and/or deportment.