Angelic Paranoia

Paranoidangel's Fanfic

The Bill

Worth It

Rating: General
Pairing: Boulton/Stanton
Summary: Everything goes as planned: Beech is in custody, Boulton is alive and CID all know Stanton's real job.

"You can't be here." Although John turning up at Claire's door wasn't unexpected.

When CIB walked into Sun Hill CID John had been out on enquiries. By the time he got back he was busting to get into the office, seen her and put the pieces together. She knew he'd turn up at her house sooner or later.

"There's an ongoing investigation. We can talk after CIB have interviewed you." She stood in the doorway, holding the door in case he tried to barge in.

"I'm not leaving."

Even though he was standing a couple of steps back from the door she could still smell the alcohol. She imagined CID had gone straight to the pub to discuss events and drown their sorrows. She didn't want to know what they'd said about her.

"Do you really want to do this on the doorstep, Claire?"

She stepped back. Although he sounded calmer she recognised that look of determination on his face. It usually meant he wasn't going to let a suspect get away or a crime go unsolved. Today it meant he wasn't going to leave until they'd talked.

He came in and shut the door. She leaned against the wall in the hall, arms folded.

"You've been lying to me this whole time." He stood opposite her, face set.

She shook her head. "Not about everything."

"Oh, so there were some truths in there, were there?" He was getting louder. "Your mother did have a stroke, you were in a relationship and I was just an opportunity to get close to Don?"

"No!" She stood up straight. "I wasn't using you, I swear."

"It certainly looks like it." He paced down her hall.

"You have a suspicious mind." Although she was starting to worry she wasn't going to be able to talk him round she didn't let it show.

He stopped and turned to face her. "I'm a copper, of course I have a suspicious mind."

"And a good sense of whether someone is telling the truth." She went over to him and said, softer, "I'm telling you the truth now, John."

"Really." He didn't look convinced.

She took a deep breath. "The reason - the real reason - we had to keep this secret was so my governor didn't find out. If he knew we were involved he would have considered me compromised, pulled me out and we'd never had got Beech."

He took a step back. "Oh, so it's all about getting a result, is it?"

"And it's never been about that for you?" she snapped back.

He stared at the floor.

"I'm sorry." She rubbed at her face. "If Hodges had found out I could have been out of CIB and transferred to goodness knows where."

"I don't believe you." He raised his head now.

"No, John..." She closed the gap between them, but he side-stepped her, heading back towards her front door.

"You used me, Claire."

"I didn't," she said desperately. "Trust me."

He shook his head, but stayed facing the door. "How can I ever trust you?" He sounded lost.

She didn't want to lose him, but didn't know how to convince him. She'd hated having to hurt him in the past. She hated it more now she could be honest with him. "I'll tell you everything, I promise. As soon as the investigation is over."

"No." That one syllable held a note of finality in it. "I never want to see you again."

"John..." But it was too late and he'd already gone, slamming the door behind him.

She leaned against the and let the tears fall. She'd got her man but lost everything else. It hadn't been worth it.